One More Chance (Chance, #2)(59)

“You’re right. About all of it,” he said as he started for the door. He stopped just outside the arched doorway. “I’m glad he found you. You’re worthy of him. He’s a lucky man.”

Then he left.

Nan

I held the invitation in my hand as I stood at the edge of the water and let the waves crash and wash over my feet. If I stood here long enough, my feet would sink in the sand to my ankles. It was an odd habit, but I did this almost every day, except in the winter when the water was just too cold.

Today I had come out here to think. I’d expected the invitation to arrive. It was happening. That much I had known even before I heard that Grant had knocked up Harlow. But seeing it was different. It was more final.

Once I had thought that Grant Carter was the one man who would see me. The me underneath. The me I was scared to show the world. The me who had been so emotionally bruised because I’d worn my heart on my sleeve as a kid. When I got older, I put that me on lockdown so tightly it made it impossible for people to hurt me.

But it made it easy for them to hate me.

There were very few people who didn’t just use me. My brother was Rush Finlay, son of the famous drummer Dean Finlay. For years, my so-called friends just wanted to get near my brother. They wanted an in. And I let them have it, because watching him screw them and throw them away was what they deserved. It was my way of taking revenge.

Then I had found out Rush wasn’t the only one with a celebrity father. Kiro Manning had been my dad all along. Yet he had never claimed me or tried to have any relationship with me. That had almost cracked me and the steel walls around my heart. His refusal to acknowledge me had almost made me completely lose my mind. Rush had been there, though, and he’d loved me. He had always been the one to love me. When no one else did, my big brother accepted me no matter how awful I acted. He didn’t approve, but he saw the me underneath.

Then Blaire had taken him from me. She’d won his heart and given him a son, and now he had little room for his messed-up sister. I hated Blaire for that. I hated that she took him away. I wanted to hate their kid, too, but damned if Nate wasn’t the cutest kid in the world. I couldn’t hate him. It was impossible.

Grant Carter had stepped in and been there when I needed someone to care. Rush was busy with his new family, and Grant had taken over his role with a different twist. Grant wasn’t my brother, and he was gorgeous. So we started screwing around, too—a friends-with-benefits thing. He didn’t expect me to be nice, and I didn’t expect him to just f**k me. He was so sweet at times, and he made things better when no one else could. Or even wanted to. He knew how to make me laugh.

But just like any good thing that comes my way, I pushed him away because I had let him get too close. I refused to accept that maybe he could love me. I was terrified to open myself up to rejection yet again.

While I was pushing Grant away, his head was turned by the complete opposite of me. A girl who had the love of her father. She was quiet and unassuming. She wasn’t mean to anyone. Ever. She was matter-of-fact but soft-spoken. She was the perfect person for Grant. I was not. I was the f**ked-up brat who didn’t feel secure enough to let herself get close to someone.

Grant fell in love with that girl, and it happened right under my nose. While I was screaming and cursing, she was quiet and calm. It would have taken an idiot not to choose her. She was the easy one to love. I was impossible.

I looked down at the invitation again. Harlow Manning had never done anything to me other than have the love of a father we shared. It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t beg for it or demand it—she just had it. I could blame her, but it would be pointless. From what I had seen, her life hadn’t been peaches just because Kiro Manning loved her. He still sucked balls at being a father. But then, having a rock star for a parent was never a positive thing.

I had been unfair to her . . . no, I had been cruel to her. But I had paid my dues. I made up for my wrongs with her. Now I could walk away and let Grant and Harlow Carter live their happily ever after. They had a baby girl and a house with a white picket fence. That was what they both deserved.

I didn’t deserve shit. I was alone in this world, and it was all my fault. I didn’t see that ever changing, because I would have to let the me I once was free, and I couldn’t do that again. Any more rejection, and I wasn’t sure I’d make it. Finding a reason to live was becoming more and more difficult.

This was my life. And I’d created it.

Grant

Harlow hadn’t even flinched when I’d said we didn’t need to send my dad an invitation to the wedding. He’d never mentioned his visit to our house, but Harlow had told me every detail. If he didn’t want to say anything to me about my baby girl, then he didn’t deserve to be a part of my wedding.

However, I had flinched when she’d said she wanted to invite Nan. Harlow’s whole attitude toward Nan had changed ever since she found out about Nan giving her blood. Although Nan was already back to her normal nasty self, as far as I could tell. I had seen her at the club bitching at Rush about something. Her haughty glares were also firmly in place. She hadn’t even acknowledged Blaire when she’d walked up to Rush. Didn’t seem to matter with Harlow, though. She would never forget what Nan had done. It was hard for me to forget, too. If she wanted to invite Nan and try to reach out to her, then I was more than willing to let her. However, all bets were off the moment Nan did anything that upset Harlow. I had my limits.