Midnight Kiss (Virgin River #12)(75)

“So…” His low voice rumbled over her as she pulled on her coat. “Looks like I interrupted quite an evening.”

Elise glared at the remnants of her pity party before she rushed through the door, slamming it behind her. “Shut up.”

“Did you steal those beers from the bar?”

“No!”

Noah grinned and fell into step behind her. They were down the side stairs and out into the night before Elise’s cheeks finally cooled. She tugged on her winter hat, squared her shoulders, and took a deep breath. She was ready for battle.

NOAH DIDN’T FEEL THE COLD. He didn’t feel anything past the numbness that had slipped over him when Elise had stepped into the pale circle of the security light. Her skin looked white, her cheeks and mouth pink as roses. And with her blue knit hat pulled down over her forehead, she looked about eighteen years old and impossibly sweet. Like an angel.

That patently ridiculous thought shook him from his reverie, and Noah gestured toward the sidewalk. They walked in silence for a long while, but the quiet wasn’t content. It was a pulsing, straining quiet, squeezing them with unspoken thoughts.

Or maybe that was all in Noah’s head.

Without a word, they headed down a sloping trail that led away from the streets of downtown where bars spilled drunks out onto the streets. The farther they walked, the quieter it grew, until the only sound was the occasional music of the black river ahead.

“Noah,” Elise snapped, making him jump. She cleared her throat and shook her head. “Thank you. It’s nice here. Pretty.” The last word was hesitant, as if she weren’t used to using delicate language.

They left the safety of the trail lights, and now only the moon brightened their way. It glinted and flashed off the river, but it was still dark. Dark enough for what Noah needed to do, anyway.

“Two years ago, you kissed me,” he said.

Her shoes scraped roughly against the trail, but she caught herself before she stumbled. “I know. I’m sorry.”

His jaw tightened. “That’s not what I want you to be sorry for.”

“I don’t get it. Haven’t I been sorry enough? Haven’t I apologized and… It was just a kiss. Why do things have to be so difficult between us?”

“Because I’ve had a thing for you for two years, Elise.”

She stopped so quickly that pebbles skittered off the trail and rustled into the bushes. “What?”

“That’s why it’s always been so…tense. At least on my side.”

“Noah. That doesn’t make any sense. You never said anything. You never said anything!”

“You were in a relationship. A long one.”

“I…no…you had a girlfriend!”

Noah shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at the sky to give himself a moment. The sky stared coldly back. “I left her. For you. You kissed me and…”

“What?” she whispered, every inch of the word tight with disbelief.

Yeah, he had trouble believing it himself. “I had a thing for you, but I ignored it until the night you kissed me. I called my girlfriend that night and ended it. I knew it was over. And then…” He flashed her a pained smile. “I found out you were already involved with someone.”

“No,” she breathed.

“Yeah. Pretty pitiful, huh?”

She didn’t acknowledge his huff of laughter. “You pushed me away!”

The pain in her voice surprised him into a frown. “When you kissed me?”

“Yes, you pushed me away. I invited you to my room, Noah. And you said no. You didn’t want me. I don’t understand…”

“I didn’t want it to start that way. Not with you.”

“Oh, God.” She covered her mouth with both hands.

Noah shook his head in confusion. Why the hell did she look like she’d seen a ghost? “Look, that’s in the past. Obviously, if I was that into you, things were never going to work out with the woman I was seeing. And your relationship was, um, stronger than it seemed, I guess.”

She pressed her fingers harder to her mouth. Even in the dark, he could see her knuckles turn white.

“Elise.”

The moon glinted off the river behind her, then caught in the moisture in her eyes.

“Hey,” he said, shocked by the sight of tears.

“I didn’t have a boyfriend,” she whispered.

The words must have been warped by the pressure of her hands. He froze in the act of reaching for her. “What?”

“I didn’t have a boyfriend.” She lowered her hands, her eyes watched him with wide horror. “I was embarrassed. Horrified. I’d thrown myself at you, and…we were going to be working together for a long time. I didn’t want that awkwardness between us. Me liking you, and you feeling sorry for me.”

“What?” he repeated, disbelief buzzing behind his eardrums.

“I didn’t start dating Evan until two months later.”

“You’re kidding me, right? That’s a joke?”

“Noah, I’m so sorry. If I’d known… If I’d known…”

He just watched her, stunned and sorry for what they’d wasted.

“If I’d known,” she whispered, “I’d never have let you go.”