Life and Death: Twilight Reimagined (Twilight #5)(20)

“Hey, Edythe,” I said.

She turned her head half an inch toward me, but her eyes stayed focused on the blackboard. She gave me one little half-nod, then turned her face away from me.

And that was the last contact I’d had with her, though she was there, a foot away from me, every day. I watched her sometimes, unable to stop myself—always from a distance, though, in the cafeteria or parking lot. I watched as her golden eyes grew noticeably darker day by day (then abruptly, they were honey-colored again. And the slow progression toward black would start over). But in class I gave no more notice that she existed than she showed toward me. It was miserable. And the dreams continued.

She wished she hadn’t pushed me out of the way of Taylor’s van. I couldn’t think of any other explanation. Since she obviously preferred me dead, she was pretending that I was.

Despite my outright lies, the tone of my e-mails got my mom worked up. She called a few times, demanding to know I was okay. I tried to convince her it was just the rain that had me down.

McKayla, at least, was pleased by the obvious coolness between my lab partner and me. I guessed she’d been worried that the shared trauma would have bonded us or something. She got more confident, sitting on the edge of my table to talk before Biology class started, ignoring Edythe as completely as Edythe ignored us.

The snow washed away for good after that one dangerously icy day. McKayla complained that she’d never gotten to stage her big snowball fight, but she was happy that the beach trip would soon be possible. The rain continued heavily, though, and the weeks passed.

I hadn’t really been aware of how much time was passing. Most days looked the same—gray, green, and more gray. My stepdad had always complained that Phoenix didn’t have seasons, but as far as I could tell, Forks was much worse. I had no idea spring was anywhere near appearing until I was walking to the cafeteria with Jeremy one rainy morning.

“Hey, Beau?” he asked.

I wanted to hurry out of the rain, but Jeremy was barely shuffling forward. I slowed my pace to match his.

“What’s up, Jeremy?”

“I was just wondering if anyone’s asked you to the spring dance yet. You know, it’s girls’ choice.”

“Oh. Um, no.”

“Huh. Do you want… I mean, do you think McKayla will ask you?”

“I hope not,” I said, maybe a little too fast.

He looked up at me, surprised. “Why not?”

“I don’t do dances.”

“Oh.”

We shuffled forward for a minute in silence. He was thoughtful. I was impatient to get out of the drizzle.

“Do you mind if I tell her that?” he asked.

“No. That’s probably a good idea. I don’t want to have to tell anyone no if I don’t have to.”

“Okay.”

“When’s the dance again?”

We were close to the cafeteria now. He pointed to a bright yellow poster advertising the dance. I’d never noticed it before, but it was curling around the edges and a little washed out, like it had been up for a while.

“A week from Saturday,” he said.

I was pretty sure Jeremy had already said something when, the next morning, McKayla was not her usual bubbly self in English. At lunch she sat away from both Jeremy and me, and she didn’t say much to anyone. She stayed quiet as she walked with me to Biology, but she came over like usual to sit on the edge of my lab table. As always, I was too aware of Edythe sitting close enough to touch, but still so far away she might as well have been a product of my imagination.

“So,” McKayla said, looking at the floor instead of at me. “Jeremy said that you don’t do dances.”

“Yeah, that’s true.”

She looked at me then, her expression hurt and a little angry. I hadn’t even told her no yet, and I already felt guilty.

“Oh,” she said. “I thought maybe he was making it up.”

“Uh, sorry, no. Why would he make up a story like that?”

She frowned. “I think he wants me to ask him.”

I forced a smile. “You should. Jeremy’s great.”

She shrugged. “I guess.” Then she took a deep breath and looked me straight in the eye with a quick, nervous smile. “Would this ‘I don’t dance’ thing change if I was the one asking you to go?”

From the corner of my eye, I saw Edythe’s head suddenly tilt in my direction. Like she was listening to my answer, too.

It took me a little too long to respond. I still felt guilty, but mostly distracted. Was Edythe listening?

“Um, sorry, again.”

McKayla’s face fell. “Would it change if someone else asked you?”

Did Edythe see how McKayla’s eyes flickered in her direction?

“No. It’s a moot point anyway. I’m going to be in Seattle that day.” I needed to get out of town—two Saturdays from now was the perfect time to go.

“Does it have to be that weekend?” McKayla asked.

“Yeah. But don’t worry about me. You should take Jeremy. He’s much more fun than I am.”

“Yeah, I guess,” she mumbled, and she turned to walk back to her seat. I watched her shoulders slump forward, and I felt horrible. I closed my eyes and pushed my fingers against my temples, trying to force McKayla’s dejected posture out of my head. Mrs. Banner started talking. I sighed and opened my eyes.