Lacybourne Manor (Ghosts and Reincarnation #3)(104)

That was not what he expected to hear and it so surprised him, he momentarily forgot his desire.

“Why would I leave you?”

Her dazed eyes found his.

“Who in their right mind sells their body for a minibus for oldies?” she burst out breathily, frustrated, tracing his arm to his hand to force him back to where she wanted him but he was now more interested in what she said than what they both wanted. She swiftly reminded him, “I told you, Colin, and you promised. Now I want it back,” she demanded and he pushed her on her back and loomed over her, spreading her legs with his thigh and pressing against her.

“You didn’t want me to leave?” he asked.

This was definitely something he wasn’t expecting and he found himself enjoying an entirely different sense of triumph.

Her gaze was soft on his face, her expression filled with longing but he could see fear there as well.

“No,” she whispered.

“Why?” he pressed.

“Colin, please. Don’t ask me these things.”

“Why didn’t you want me to leave?” he demanded, ignoring her request, now wanting more than ever to hear what she had to say, indeed, he found he needed to hear it.

“Because I thought you might be…”

She stopped, her hand drifted down his abdomen with seductive intent and he grabbed it and pulled it to his chest.

“Sibyl –”

“Someone special!” she suddenly shouted, losing her battle against him, her stubbornness and her body’s desire. “I thought you were someone special and I didn’t want you to think I was some crazy woman and leave. I mean, it isn’t every day someone sells their body and with it their soul and all they feel is good and right about themselves for a minibus! Don’t you find that odd? Strange? Utterly ludicrous? Do you want to be with a woman like that? I think not,” she snapped, not letting him react. Her words tore at him, lacerating his heart.

All they feel is good and right about themselves...

All of his desire to torment her fled as he stared at her, his heart clenching with guilt.

He had nothing to say except to point out the very important fact that she was exactly the kind of woman he wanted to be with but she didn’t give him the chance to say it.

She reared away from him, yanking her wrist out of his grasp, but he caught her and rolled to his back, pulling her on top of him, his thigh still pressed between hers and he lifted his knee.

“I’ve got to get out of here!” she cried desperately.

She was near tears, he could see them shimmering in her eyes.

“Sibyl.”

He knew then that, regrettably, he’d lost control of the situation and she’d lost control of her emotions. This wasn’t about desire anymore but about something else, something he was powerless to control, something that was totally Sibyl. The only thing he could do was ride it out.

“What?” she snapped. “You’re ruthless, you know. Just plain old mean.” Not allowing him to respond to those true, awful (but also rather adorable) statements, she tried to pull away again and grunted with the effort then stopped at once, for seemingly no reason, caught in her own turmoil, her weight collapsed on him and this time, he grunted.

“My parents warned me, after the animal shelter debacle, they warned me I’d end up doing something stupid and here I am. I should have said yes to you when you asked me out after the night at the club. But how was I to know you were, well… you!” she exploded. “That you were the type of man who could, and would, with a couple of phone calls, have gotten that vile minibus driver sacked. Or that you could be gentle and tender, sweet and generous. I didn’t know who you were, what you could do or that you’d even do it! I would have done anything in these last few weeks to take all of this back so you wouldn’t think I was a worthless, money-grubbing slut. But, back then, I thought you were insane. Now I know everything and…” She stopped abruptly, deciding again to fight, she pushed against him then just as suddenly gave up and crumpled on him, promptly lost control and burst into tears.

Finally given the opportunity to get a word in edgewise, he was speechless at learning what he did in her shouted, abject confession. He could do nothing but hold her as she cried against his chest, moving only once to press her face between his shoulder and neck. Her body was wracked with her tears, tears wrought by something far beyond her confession, something deeper, more painful. He was not certain he understood it and definitely didn’t know what to do about it.

Colin was not used to not knowing what to do. In fact, he was pretty certain there was never a time when he didn’t know what to do.

Then she started speaking again, her words stunted and jerky with tears. “It was just Meg,” she said and this made him all the more confused because he didn’t know who the hell Meg was, until she spoke again and it became dreadfully clear as to what had been tormenting Sibyl for weeks.

And what Sibyl Godwin said next began to melt Colin Morgan’s brittle, cold heart.

“When she broke her hip falling out of the bus. I yelled at the minibus driver a few days before, letting my stupid, stupid temper get the best of me. Kyle told me I would make it worse for them if I upset the minibus driver and I did. I made it worse! So much worse! And Meg got hurt because of it. Because of me! It was all my fault so I had to fix it, no matter what it meant. I had to fix it. And then you came in and gave me a way to fix it and it was the worst way possible but I had to take it because it was the only choice I had and it was all my fault!”