Just To Be With You (The Sullivans #12)(75)

The flight back was as smooth as the trip there had been rough, which should have been great news...and yet…Ian found himself wishing that they’d hit rough air again so that he could have another chance to hold Tatiana’s hands and be close to her.

With every mile they covered, as the distance between them grew bigger and bigger, Ian knew that all he would need to do to make her change her mind about leaving him was to pull her back into his arms and kiss her. One kiss and she’d feel, she’d remember, what was between them—how extraordinary it was. And then she’d come back to him and give him the chance he’d all but begged for, and he wouldn’t have to face the thought of a night without her in his arms.

But how could he do that when he knew she’d done exactly the right thing by getting out before he eventually destroyed the light inside her?

Finally, the plane landed, but once they’d both unbuckled and stood, Tatiana stayed standing before him. “Ian—” Her mouth trembled and she pressed her lips together for a moment before continuing. “Before we get off the plane and the real world swallows us up, can I ask you a few last questions?” She laughed a little then, but he could hear how shaken she was beneath it. “Really, I mean it this time. These will be my last ones.”

“Anything, Tatiana.”

“If I call you tonight. Tomorrow. Next week. Next month. Will you promise not to pick up? And if—” Tears welled up in her beautiful eyes. “—if I come by your office, if I tell you I need to do more research, will you promise not to let me in?” She lowered her head to brush tears away. “And if you find me standing on the tarmac again waiting to spin you a tale about needing to get on your plane with you for a role, will you promise not to fall for it?” She pulled her canvas bag up and held it in front of her chest like a shield. “One day I hope I’ll be my old self again and the memories will have faded enough that I’ll be strong enough to resist you on my own. But until then...I’m going to need your help, and your promises, not to fall for any other ideas I might come up with in the middle of the night when I’m missing you like crazy.”

He’d told her he’d do anything for her. But he hadn’t known—hadn’t truly known what it was like to love until now. Not until the most beautiful woman in the world stood so close and just out of reach, at the same time as she asked him to help her stay away from him.

It nearly killed him to say the words, “I promise.”

He watched as she forced the corners of her lips up. “Thank you.” But she still didn’t walk away. “I also wanted to wish you good luck with your meeting with Flynn today, although I know you won’t need it. He’s going to sign the deal.” Her smile was genuine now. “And I’m going to be so, so happy for you when he does. Let him know I said hello.”

When she finally turned to go, Ian felt as though his insides were tearing in two. “I don’t need to do the deal, Tatiana.” She turned back to him in shock as he said, “If I walk away from it, I’ll have more time to spend with you.”

Tatiana had surprised him right from the very first time he’d met her, but even though he now knew her better than he’d ever known anyone else, the very last thing he expected to see on her face was anger.

“Would you ever ask me to give up acting?”

“Of course not.”

“Then why do you think I would ever in a million years want you to give up on your own dreams?” She shook her head. “I saw firsthand how excited you are about Flynn’s company, and about working personally with him. I know how much you thrive on your work, and I love that you do. Can’t you see that you’ve never let me, or anyone else, down before by being true to yourself? But if you blow this deal on purpose, if you walk away from working directly with Flynn after you gave him your word, all because you can’t get it through your thick skull that you’re already perfect just the way you are...well, then, you won’t just be letting me down. You’ll be letting yourself down, too.”

As she turned for the door and he followed her, he felt like he was watching them both on screen, like all of this was happening in a movie, rather than his real life. Because how could he have finally found something so beautiful, so incredible, and then lost it so quickly?

“T!”

Tatiana had called Valentina to let her know they were finally coming back to Seattle, and now Valentina and Smith were standing at the bottom of the steps waiting to fold Tatiana into a hug.

“I’m so glad you’re back safe and sound.” Ian watched Valentina brush the hair back from Tatiana’s forehead so that she could look into her sister’s face to make sure she really, truly was okay. “But you’re crying. Why are you crying?”

“I’m just so happy to see you.”

Valentina pulled her sister closer and lifted her questioning gaze to Ian’s face. He’d barely been able to hide what he felt for Tatiana a week ago.

Now he simply didn’t have a prayer.

Valentina paled even as Smith, who had clearly already put two and two together, came forward with hands curled into fists.

“What the hell, Ian?”

His cousin was clearly spoiling for a fight, but when Tatiana said something in a voice that was too soft for Ian to make out, Valentina cut Smith off with a hand on his arm. “Tatiana’s ready to head home now.”