Just To Be With You (The Sullivans #12)(69)

A light through the fog about a half mile away in the direction of town caught their eye and they headed toward it.

“What a gorgeous lighthouse!” Tatiana’s eyes were wide with wonder as they came close enough to see it clearly, the red-roofed lantern room rising from the trees that surrounded it.

“Dylan used to make us visit every lighthouse he could find when we were kids. I’ve always been amazed that they were able to create a light that was bright enough and strong enough to cut through even the darkest, fiercest storms. The light, the strength, the hope,” he found himself saying, “reminds me of you.”

Rain spiked her eyelashes as she turned to face him and her cheeks were flushed from the cold. “I know I promised you I wouldn’t talk about certain things while we’re here.” She moved closer and turned to face him. “But I have to do this.”

She lifted her mouth to his and in her kiss he heard and felt the words of love she’d promised not to say aloud.

What, he wondered when she pulled back, had she heard, and felt, in his kiss?

And was it more, even, than he was ready to admit to himself?

* * *

The island’s shoreline was green and rugged, and so was Ian in the raincoat and gumboots that Tim had left outside their door. Every time she’d seen Ian before today, he’d always been perfectly clean-shaven and polished. Both looks suited him, she realized. The master of the universe in the tailored suit and the rugged outdoorsman with dark scruff on his face, and muddy boots.

They walked past the lighthouse and toward the tiny little strip of stores, and as they came closer, she could see lights on inside the post office and grocery store. Though she and Ian remained the only ones out on the street, would he pull away when they got close enough to be seen together? He’d clearly been on edge when he’d asked if she’d told her sister about them, so how would he feel if the rest of the world found out that he’d made her his?

A little sigh escaped her, one that puffed white in the air around her mouth and had him turning to give her a questioning look. But they’d agreed not to talk about their relationship—what it was, what it wasn’t, what it could be—and just be with each other in this storm. So she simply said, “While we’re here, why don’t we pick up a few things to eat?”

He stared at her for a few seconds longer, continuing to hold her hand as they stood in the middle of the empty, rain-filled street. She wanted to kiss him, wanted to declare her love for him not only in front of the shop owners, but the rest of the world that would surely be alerted within seconds once they saw who she was.

But since she suspected it would break her heart if he let go of her hand, she made herself do it first before heading inside the store.

“How do you feel about meatloaf?”

“Sounds good.”

For the first time all day, things between them felt strained. In their room above the barn, they’d been entirely in their own world. But this little grocery store felt more like the real world than anything else had since they’d landed. There was a rack of magazines, a couple of which had her face on the cover, and a flat-screen TV on in the corner.

She’d already loaded up her hand basket with ground beef, ketchup, a bell pepper, garlic, and onions when she rounded the aisle and saw the cutest display of jewelry. “Look, they’re perfect little replicas of the lighthouse.”

Ian took one off the display and, without a word, walked up to the front counter to pay for it. She stood right where she was, unable to move, barely able to breathe, until he came back to where she was standing. They were hidden from the man at the checkout by a tall shelf, so no one could see Ian undo the clasp and lay it against her collarbone, then lift her hair and move it to the opposite shoulder so that he could close the clasp. It was such an intimate gesture that for one brief, perfect moment, she felt as though they were a real couple.

“I never got you a gift to celebrate your nomination. Nothing was right. Not until now. Not until this.”

“I didn’t need a gift,” she replied in a soft voice, “but I’ll cherish this one forever.” The lighthouse charm necklace was better than jewels for her. Sweet and fun and a memory she’d have forever of the most wonderful days of her life. No matter what happened between them in the future, she’d always treasure these precious, stolen hours with him.

She recognized the look in his eyes—he wanted to kiss her—along with the frustration that he felt because he couldn’t.

“Do we need anything else to eat?” he asked.

She’d temporarily forgotten all about why they were in the store and when she looked down at the basket in her hands it took her brain a few seconds to click back into gear. “Maybe some fruit. Cheese and crackers might be good, too.” Her stomach grumbled. “And bacon.”

Quickly, they gathered up the rest of the groceries. It had been good to get outside, to walk in the rain together, to see the pretty lighthouse. But now, they both wanted to get back to their own private world. One where they didn’t have to worry about what the man at the checkout would think seeing them together, or whom he might tell.

“Wicked storm, eh? Hoping it will blow out just as fast as it blew in, the way it usually does.” The grizzled man didn’t wait for them to pipe in, just kept talking. “Thought I saw a piece of blue sky earlier.” He peered out the window. “Thought maybe the rain slacked off for a bit there.”