Jaded (Jaded #1)(51)

“Everyone at school is going to know,” I said faintly.

“Let’s play basketball or…I don’t know. Let’s go for a run.”

“We should call the cops now.”

“Shut up, Corrigan!” I yelled. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

He yelled back, “You don’t want to talk about anything!”

“Shut up both of you!” Bryce hissed, “We’re going to wake your parents.”

That shut us up.

I stood and spoke, “I’m going to shower.”

Corrigan glanced at me and then away. He closed his eyes and laid down.

Bryce watched me leave the room. When I turned the corner, I heard him ask, “You got more alcohol?”

“Yeah,” Corrigan said tiredly and got up.

I closed the bathroom door and leaned against it while I slid to the floor. My hands were chalk-white as I pressed them against my legs. It felt weird. I couldn’t feel my hands against my legs. I only stared at them in sick fascination. A person should be able to feel, but my legs had gone numb.

When I saw some spots on my shirt, it took a minute before I realized they were tears. I’d been crying and not known it. Then I watched as another one fell to my shirt and realized I was still crying.

Weak, I got up and turned the shower on. I turned the water to scalding hot and stripped my clothes off before I stepped inside. I slid to the floor and sat there, arms wrapped around my knees.

The water pounded on me and I watched the water slide to circle the drain.

It was slowly sucked downwards, like a vacuum.

I wasn’t surprised when the door opened and Bryce stepped inside.

I just looked up at him and he sighed. He moved me and sat behind where he wrapped his arms around me. I hugged his arms as they hugged me.

He rested his head in the crook between my shoulders and neck. His cheek grazed against the side of mine.

We both shuddered for a moment until I realized it was me. I was trembling and Bryce was trying to stop it.

A choked gasp sounded and echoed in the shower. That came from me too.

“Where’s Corrigan?” I asked, huskily.

Bryce soothed his hands up and down my arms. “He called the police. They’re going to come and get the letter.”

“I don’t—”

“They have to have it.”

I shut up. The fight had left me. I knew they were right, but…

“I don’t want that to happen. I don’t want…”

“You didn’t do anything,” Bryce insisted. “Whoever did that is sick and the cops have to know. He might do it to you.”

I closed my eyes as I finally felt the water hit my skin. Finally.

“Everyone at school is going to know,” I murmured, wondering why I said it.

“I know. They’ll just know that we found her. That’s it.”

“Her parents,” I said softly, haunted. “I bet they’ll be devastated.”

Bryce frowned next to me and said, “Your parents would be devastated too.”

“Would they?”

“Yeah,” he said firmly.

“Your mom would pray for me.” She should’ve prayed for Leisha.

Bryce laughed abruptly and then stopped just as quick. He swore.

I slid my hand into his and threaded our fingers. I asked, “Why don’t you want me in the mornings?”

“What?” he asked, startled. Distracted.

“In the mornings. We don’t have sex. Why not?” Bryce shrugged.

“Why not?” I pressed.

“Sheldon,” he sighed.

“I want to know.”

He burst out, “Because it’s too hard to make myself give you space if I make love to you in the mornings. It’s too hard to go back and remember your ‘hands-off’ policy.”

The emotional ties. That was why.

“I’ve never given you a hands-off policy,” I said faintly.

“It’s the same thing. No commitment, right?” Bryce cursed. “I swear, you get pissed if I don’t let other girls hit on me.”

I shifted uncomfortably.

“See,” he pointed out. “This is what Corrigan was talking about. You don’t talk about anything, especially you and me.”

“I just asked why we don’t have sex in the mornings.” I turned and glared at him.

Pissed. No, I was livid.

“No,” Bryce said firmly, daring me to argue with him. “I said ‘make love’ and you said ‘have sex.’ They’re different.”

“It’s not that different. It’s still screwing.”

“No,” he spelled it out, saddened. “You screw me. I make love to you.”

I pulled away and scooted directly underneath the water. It plastered my hair to my face, covering my eyes, nose, mouth, everything.

I sat there, stunned at Bryce’s words until he cursed and yanked me out of the water. He brushed the hair from my face and glared at me.

And then he softened and kissed me.

I moaned and clung to him, demanding. I needed this, I needed this kind of warmth.

Bryce grabbed me and lifted me on top of him.

I straddled him and sunk down until he was firmly sheathed inside of me. And then I moved.