In The Afterlight (The Darkest Minds #3)(146)

Not Liam. Not now. Not ever. He wasn’t a killer. Losing himself in a single moment would fracture him at his core. It would be a bone that healed crookedly inside him, until it changed his shape.

I saw the moment he came back to himself, the way his nostrils flared and his eyes cleared. When he looked up at the PSF running toward us again, this time he threw a hand out, sending the soldier crashing back into the nearest wall. Knocking him out cold.

He released a shuddering breath as he looked down at me again. Gently, with a level of care that seemed at odds with his actions only a second ago, he inspected the cuts on my arms and swore. I was trembling, but he must have mistaken the pain for cold because he ripped his jacket off and drew it around me, zipping it up my throat to trap the warmth inside. I bit back the sob welling up in my chest.

“Why did it have to be you?” he demanded. “Why did it have to be you?”

“Sorry,” I whispered. For Cole, for making him come here, for everything, in case the darkness came back and I couldn’t say it then. “Sorry, love you, love you so much...”

Liam kissed me again. “Can we get the hell out of here now?”

Another figure in black appeared at the head of the stairs, his shoulders heaving as he caught his breath. I scrambled for my gun, but Liam gripped my hand. “Over here—”

I saw a flash of black skin, a handsome, grizzled face as he rushed toward us. “Is she all right?”

“Not...really,” Liam said, leaning back so his stepfather could see my leg. To me he insisted, “but you’re going to be fine, you hear me?”

“Ouch, darlin’,” Harry said, crouching down to examine it. “We’re going to get you out of here, all right?”

“I have to walk out of...I have to walk out of here,” I told him, mind fogging over with the pain. “I have to walk out of here. My own feet.”

He exchanged a tense look with Liam.

“We need something to brace it with,” Liam started, looking around.

“There’s no time for that,” Harry said. “They’ll have medics at the meet point.”

“I have to walk out.” I didn’t care how crazy it made me sound, they needed to understand. Cole would understand—would have understood. Cole was past-tense now. I squeezed my eyes shut.

When I opened them again, Harry reached over to a radio clipped onto his left shoulder. “This is Stewart. We have her. Proceeding to exit. ETA three minutes.”

There was a flurry of static responses.

“Okay, darlin’, I’m gonna get you up,” Liam said, rising to his feet. “Put your arms around my shoulders, that’s right, just like that.” True to their word, once they had me up, they adjusted me so I could stand on my good leg.

I don’t remember the hallway as it passed us, only how it felt each time my right leg swung forward. The frigid air on my skin as we stepped out into the night, the first touch of rain. I smelled smoke. The air hung heavy with it.

Up ahead, there was a river of green and blue moving out of the camp’s front gate. The kids walked quickly, waved on by figures in black, their white bands stark against their sleeves. I was proud of how calm they were, the way they listened to the instructions they were given, even half-terrified or in shock. Thurmond, at least, had trained them to do that much.

“Reds—” I tried to say. I saw the warm glow of a fire at the far end of the camp, where the Factory was burning.

“They’re secured,” Harry said, giving the hand I’d hooked around his neck a gentle squeeze. “Put up one hell of a fight.”

“Hurt?”

“Everyone’s okay,” he promised. He let out a sharp whistle, and the nearest figure in black turned around expectantly and ran toward us. She moved with a kind of animal grace, arms pumping at her side, boots spraying mud everywhere as she trampled through the puddles and thick, black mud.

I couldn’t see her face through the curtain of rain, but I knew. Vida.

She would have crashed into us if Harry hadn’t put out a strong hand to catch her.

“Careful!” Liam warned, drawing me closer to his side as Harry pulled back and untangled his grip. Vida filled in the spot he’d vacated, wrapping both arms around me.

“Holy shit,” she said. “I’m going to kill you, I’m actually going to wring your little neck. I’m going to—to—”

“I’m going to sweep through the Mess one last time to check for stragglers,” Harry said. “Mac, John, and I will bring up the rear.”

“See you at the meet point,” Liam said. “Ruby, let me carry you, please—”

“I have to walk.” My throat ached, the words coming out in a croak. “Can you help me?”

He had already started to adjust his grip when Vida stopped him by taking the other half of my weight. “Whatever you want, as long it means getting you out of this goddamn nightmare factory. I mean, holy shit, boo.”

Our progress was slow and awkward through the mud, but we staggered forward, drifting into the rush of kids moving out, heading toward the gate that was blown wide open.

It rained the day they brought us to Thurmond.

And it rained the day I walked out.

I knew I was in trouble when I couldn’t shake the cold. Couldn’t stop trembling. As we walked through the woods, following the kids ahead of us, the black uniforms with white bands at the front, my shivering made my muscles lock and limbs seize.