Illuminae (The Illuminae Files #1)(34)



Mason, E, LT 2nd: Damn, I still remember first day in her class. You were checking me out HARD, Grant.

ByteMe: U. R. DELUSIONAL. u kept asking me stupid questions about hydrogen bonding

Mason, E, LT 2nd: confession: hydrogen was not the kind of bonding on my mind

ByteMe: o rly? am I to understand it was highly sophisticated courting behavior? did i misinterpret it, with my backwater ways?

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Mock if you will. I’ll refrain from pointing out you DID end up falling madly in love with me

ByteMe: …

Mason, E, LT 2nd: I’m nice like that

ByteMe: madly as in it was complete insanity to do it. and i was misled on the whole “wishing-to-bond” front by the way you kept sticking your tongue down jodie kingston’s throat

ByteMe: it was like you were trying to make up for missed biology lessons with practical experience. ew.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: you know Jodie’s dead, right?

ByteMe: i … jesus

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Way to go, mood-killer

ByteMe: okay, sorry

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Lol, you’re so bad at this, Grant

Mason, E, LT 2nd: That’s one of the things I love about you

ByteMe: f*ck off, I was trying to make you feel better

Mason, E, LT 2nd: …

Mason, E, LT 2nd: You kiss your mother with that mouth?

Mason, E, LT 2nd: How is your mom anyways? I would literally swim the few thousand klicks of vacuum between Alexander and Hypatia for some of her dessert

ByteMe: Yeah, I always knew what you were really at my place for.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Hey, you should thank her. I owe this manly physique almost entirely to her home cooking

Mason, E, LT 2nd: *flexes*

ByteMe: I was totally just in it for your manly physique, u know. I watched so many boring geeball games for that physique. And all before u even asked me out

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Boring? Ok NOW you’re hurting my feelings.

ByteMe: i’m flattering you, idiot.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: You know, you’ve REALLY gotta think of a better pet name for me than “idiot.”

Mason, E, LT 2nd: What about “sweetiepuff”

Mason, E, LT 2nd: “sugarpants”?

Mason, E, LT 2nd: NONO WAIT. “CUDDLEPIE”

ByteMe: I will hack the Alexander comms system and let them know you prefer to be known as Cuddlepie immediately, my love

Mason, E, LT 2nd: noooooooooooooooo

ByteMe: u look as good in your uniform as you did in your geeball gear? if not please lie.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Well the pants are tighter, if that counts for anything

ByteMe: mmmmm go on

Mason, E, LT 2nd: u sure?

Mason, E, LT 2nd: We’d need waaaay more than seven minutes for that ;)

ByteMe: Always took about 2 mins as I recall

Mason, E, LT 2nd: 0_o

ByteMe: Set yourself up for that one son.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: …

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Well played, madam.

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Well played indeed

ByteMe: speaking of 7 mins, time to split

Mason, E, LT 2nd: Yeah

Mason, E, LT 2nd: i miss you, you know

ByteMe: you too

ByteMe: and seriously, things r only going to get more intense. be calm. be smart.

ByteMe: stay safe, shnookums

Mason, E, LT 2nd: see now you’re just being silly

COUNTDOWN TO LINCOLN INTERCEPTION
OF ALEXANDER FLEET:

58 hours: 41 minutes

Date: 07/27/75

Text: alone

I’m not ready to die.

If the Lincoln catches us, she’ll destroy us. There’s simply no other reason she’d chase us for months on end if it wasn’t to hide the last of the evidence. Wipe out the only witnesses with a chance to tell the universe BeiTech attacked another corp, hijacked their illegal processing plant and oh yes killed thousands of people.

That, or we’re on the lam because the Lincoln’s captain is secretly Torrence’s angry ex-girlfriend and they have unfinished business. He’s totally the kind of guy who’d leave the toilet seat up.

I think my jokes are getting worse. Weirder, anyway. The sleep dep is really getting to me. But I can’t miss a chance to peek inside AIDAN and help out Byron, and that means jumping onto a new ID every time a tech takes a break. And in the spare minutes I’m supposed to be sleeping, I’m thinking about what we might find if we make it out of this alive instead.

I figure it this way: WUC’s operation on Kerenza was illegal, so they can’t tell the UTA we stopped reporting in. When Kerenza was attacked, our alarms would’ve been relayed through the closest waypoint, and then on to Heimdall Station. But the only ship that showed up—the Alexander—was on patrol nearby. Which means our SOS never made it out of the system. And if Heimdall didn’t send the cavalry, that has to mean the station itself was taken as part of the BT attack. Which means my dad might be dead. I am not okay with that.

I am NOT OKAY WITH THAT.

We’ll never make it as far as Heimdall, says my brain, and if we do, Heimdall’s been taken anyway. It says nobody made it off the Copernicus alive—or not alive in any way I’d recognize. I lie in my bunk, pretending I’m at home, and just return those thoughts to sender. They show up, and try to get their claws into me, and with a mental NO I push them back. Force myself somewhere safer. Counting rivets. Tugging at the loose threads along the edge of my sheet, winding them so tight around my fingers my nails turn blue.

Amie Kaufman, Jay Kr's Books