If The Seas Catch Fire(113)

As he drove. Sergei tried not to think about whether he regretted that they hadn’t taken the time to go to bed once more. Now that the truth was out, and they both knew what had to happen, he just… couldn’t.

And the hit… It didn’t even have to happen today—his contacts all knew big hits took planning. He had time. But making this go on longer benefitted no one.

So Sergei drove. And didn’t look at Dom. And tried not to notice the outline of the pistol pressing into his leg.

A few miles past the mile marker where he’d met Katashi last time, Sergei pulled over. Wordlessly, they got out of the car, and Dom followed Sergei into the woods. As they picked their way through the underbrush, Sergei caught himself hoping this was an ambush. That Dom was waiting for the right opportunity to pull out a gun of his own and drop him.

But he didn’t. Damn him.

At a clearing, Sergei stopped. “This… this should be far enough from the road. No one will hear anything.”

Dom pulled in a long breath through his nose. “Just don’t make me dig my own grave.”

“That’s not funny.”

Dom faced him, his expression completely serious. “I’m not joking.”

Sergei raised his eyebrows. “I… wouldn’t. No way.”

“Thank you.”

Though he knew he was only making it worse for both of them, Sergei wrapped his arms around Dom. “I’m sorry. I wish there was another way.”

“Me too.”

Sergei cupped his face and kissed him, and held him tight. When they separated, they held each other’s gazes for a few seconds, and then pulled apart completely.

Here we go. This is it.

Sergei slid the pistol out of the holster.

Dom gulped. “Just promise me you’ll leave after this.” He eyed the gun, and then met Sergei’s gaze. “Get the f*ck out of Cape Swan and never look back.”

Sergei nodded, nausea rising in his throat. “I promise.” He glanced at his pistol. “I… I’ve never done this with someone who’s…”

“Not fighting?”

“Yeah. That.”

Dom avoided his eyes. Without a word, he knelt on the ground in front of Sergei. “Just make it quick, all right?”

Sergei flinched. “Shouldn’t…” His mind raced, searching for any means to delay the inevitable. “Don’t you want to see a priest first?”

Dom lifted his gaze. “After everything I’ve seen, do you really think I still believe in God?”

So much for that stalling tactic.

“Please, Sergei,” Dom breathed. “Don’t drag this out.”

Heart thumping and stomach twisting, Sergei stepped closer. He was tempted to kiss him, or touch his face one last time, but that just seemed like unnecessary torment for both of them.

Dom tilted his head back. Sergei pressed the muzzle up under his jaw.

He curled his finger around the trigger. One pull. All he had to do was give it one pull, and this would all be over.

But his hand shook. Goddammit.

He forced his emotions back. He could break down afterward. Not while Dom was still alive. While he could see him, hear him, realize how much this hurt. No, he’d wait until he was sure Dom’s heart wasn’t beating anymore.

Dom put his hand over Sergei’s. “Just do it.” His finger slid over the top of Sergei’s, and when he swallowed, his jaw pushed against the muzzle. “Please.”

Just one shot. Once his heart stops, I can lose it.

Just one shot.

One bullet.

One—

He jerked the gun away. With shaking hands, he dropped the magazine and cleared the chamber, and then tossed all the pieces on the ground. “I won’t.”

“Sergei—”

“No.” He met Dom’s gaze and clenched his jaw. “They killed people I love. If they want you dead too, I’m not doing that dirty work for them.”

“But they’ll kill you too.”

“I know.” He dropped to his knees and touched Dom’s face, tears falling freely down his face as he whispered, “And I’d rather have a bull’s eye on my head than your blood on my hands.”

“You’re insane,” Dom said, wiping Sergei’s tears. “I don’t want—”

Sergei cut him off with a hard kiss. He gripped the back of Dom’s neck until he knew it had to hurt, and refused to let go.

Dom’s lips softened, and he opened to Sergei. One hand appeared on Sergei’s cheek. The other arm snaked around his waist. Sighing in unison, they pulled each other closer.

When Sergei’s lips left Dom’s, his voice was thick with tears, but he managed, “There has to be another way. I’m not doing this.”

Dom exhaled, touching his forehead to Sergei’s. He didn’t argue, though. Instead, he drew Sergei in, and for the longest time, they just leaned on each other. With his head against Dom’s chest, Sergei could feel every beat of Dom’s heart, and just like each beat pushed blood through Dom’s veins, it pushed relief through Sergei’s. Dom was still alive. They were both still alive. God knew where they went from here, but the bullet was lying harmlessly on the ground, still unfired in its casing.

After a while, Dom smoothed Sergei’s hair and said, “If we can’t go through with this, then the only thing we can do is take them down with us.”