Hold on Tight (Sea Breeze #8)(20)

Micah and I needed to talk first. “Give me time to help him understand. And then I’ll call you and let you know we’re ready. But I need to make sure that your mother didn’t get those letters. Because I sent them . . . and if she got them and . . .” I trailed off. I hated saying to her son that she could have known about Micah and hid it from Dewayne and his father. I’d sent those letters. They couldn’t have just vanished.

“She didn’t get them. How did you send them? Did you mail them from your aunt’s?”

I nodded. I had put them in the mailbox in the mornings.

“Would your aunt have taken them?”

No. Why would Aunt Cathy take them? She didn’t want us there with her. She was taking us in because she didn’t want us on the streets. I shook my head. “I can’t imagine she would have.”

Dewayne frowned. He didn’t look convinced. “Momma didn’t get them. Something must have happened to them. It’s possible someone intercepted them.”

I hoped he was right. Because more than anything, I wanted the Falcos to be a part of Micah’s life. I wanted him to know the people who were a part of his father. I wanted him to see pictures of his father growing up. All those things. I wanted them for him.

“You find out if she ever received those letters, and then I’ll talk to Micah. I need to know they want to be a part of his life first.”

Dewayne nodded and shoved his hands in his front pockets. “I’ll talk to Momma and let you know as soon as possible. But can we go ahead and confirm that I’m hanging out with Micah on Saturday mornings while you work? I want that time.”

Micah needed that, and it would save me money. I nodded. “Yes. That’s good. If you can’t one Saturday, just let me know at least a week in advance so I can make other arrangements.”

Dewayne grinned. “When you tell those people across the street that Micah is Dustin’s son, you will have free child care whenever you want it.”

Something else I wasn’t used to.

We said our good-byes, and I watched as Dewayne turned and headed for his truck. I may have watched his ass as he made his way to the truck, but that was my secret.

* * *

“What did he want?” Micah asked the moment I walked inside. He was sitting on the sofa with his arms crossed over his chest and his feet dangling because they couldn’t touch the floor yet.

“You were supposed to be playing in your room,” I reminded him as I made my way over to sit down beside my little man.

“I was watching out for you,” he said simply.

I reached over, pulled him against my side, and hugged him to me. It had been just us for so long. This past year had he started acting like he was the one protecting me instead of the other way around. A month ago he had asked me who kept me safe since I didn’t have a husband to do it. I informed him that I kept me and him safe. I assured him I was very good at it.

He’d changed that day. I was seeing it more and more every day. It was as if he’d realized I needed someone to take care of me, and he was doing that job. Sweet little boy of mine. I kissed his head and inhaled his outdoor smell.

“Did you enjoy your day?” I asked him.

He nodded slowly. “Yeah, but if Dewayne was mean to you, then I don’t want him to come back.”

He was about to have a whole new world opened up to him. One that would change his life. I squeezed him. “Dewayne wasn’t mean to me. Dewayne wants what I want. He wants you safe and happy.”

Micah leaned back and looked up at me. I could see the confusion in his little face. He wasn’t sure what I was saying, and the little bit of hope in those eyes of his just about undid me. He didn’t want me to know how much he wanted a man in his life, but I knew it and understood it.

It wasn’t time to tell him just how much Dewayne wanted him in his life and why. I still needed to know that Tabby Falco hadn’t gotten those letters. I had to be sure she was unaware of Micah. Because as much as Dewayne believed his mother would never do this, I knew I had sent her letters. They had to have gone somewhere.

“Will Dewayne come back again one day to play?”

He wanted Dewayne to come back. It was in his hopeful expression. I was glad he had enjoyed his time with Dewayne. “Yes. Every Saturday morning Dewayne wants to hang out with you while I work.”

A bright smile lit up his face. “He does?”

I nodded, and Micah punched his fist into the air with a cheer and jumped down from the sofa. I watched as he ran off to his room. Our conversation was over now. Smiling, I stood up and went to fix myself a sandwich.

“You want lunch?” I asked him.

“Mac ’n’ cheese,” he called back.

“You’re gonna turn into mac ’n’ cheese,” I replied.

“Good! Then I’ll eat myself.”

Shaking my head, I laughed and fixed my son some mac ’n’ cheese.

DEWAYNE

If I went home tonight, I’d only think about shit. So I went out to Live Bay, where I knew I’d have friends. People to distract me. It was where some of us always showed up on weekends. Even my married-with-kids friends.

I sat back with a beer and watched as Krit Corbin sang while eye-f*cking his girlfriend. It was like some strange turn in the universe. When Preston Drake had fallen in love with our best friend’s little sister, I’d thought he had lost his ever-loving mind. Now the Sea Breeze man whore and lead singer of Jackdown was completely f**ked over a girl. The world was going to shit.