Heaven and Hell (Heaven and Hell #1)(166)
Oh. My. God.
He couldn’t live without me.
His face got close. “You cannot leave me. You can’t. I can’t live without you.”
He couldn’t live without me.
He was in hell, just like me.
And just like he did for me, I showed him heaven.
“Sam,” I whispered, melting into him, “I said okay.”
“Never,” he returned immediately.
“Sorry?”
“Promise you will never leave me.”
“Sam, honey, I love you.”
“But you left me.”
“Right, because you left me. But now you’re back and you just gave me all of you. I needed it; you came all the way to England and gave it to me so now that I have you, all of you, I promise you, honey, I will never leave you.”
He stared at me and I let him.
Then he said, “You went on a date.”
Oh man.
“It wasn’t a date,” I told him.
“Looked like a date,” he told me.
“Well, it wasn’t. We had coffee. I was only there fifteen minutes. That’s not a date.”
“So who was he?”
“Some guy I met at a museum. He was nice, friendly, asked me for coffee so he could tell me what parts of London I should see. He’s from here.”
“It was a date.”
I felt my eyes narrow and snapped, “Sam! He was just being friendly!”
“To you, because you’re clueless about bein’ beautiful. To him, he wanted in there.”
He was, of course, right.
But…
Seriously?
We just had a month of separation and an emotionally charged drama and we were here?
I took my hands from his neck and planted them on my hips.
“Honestly? I see you for the first time in a month, I think we’re over, my heart is broken, I cry myself to sleep every… single… freaking night knowing I’ll never have all of you, wanting all of you so much it hurts to breathe and knowing even what you gave me will be better than what I could get from anybody, worried that I made a huge mistake but knowing in my heart that I couldn’t live with the secrets. Then you come back, give me all of you then you give me shit about some stupid guy who means nothing to me, so much of nothing I didn’t even remember his name. A guy who I will never again see instead of, oh… I don’t know,” I said the last sarcastically, “maybe kissing me?”
Sam glared at me.
Then his gaze shifted over my features, his face went soft, his eyes went warm, his lips twitched and his hands slid back into my hair.
“You didn’t remember his name?” he asked.
“No,” I snapped.
His lips twitched again.
Seriously!
Then he whispered, “You want me to kiss you, baby?”
It was my turn to glare at him and I returned, “I did. Now I’m thinking, not so much.”
His lip twitch turned into a smile as his hands in my hair tilted my head one way, his head slanted the other and his lips muttered against mine, “Tough.”
Then he kissed me.
It was heaven.
* * * * *
Naked, lying next to a na**d Sam in his huge, posh hotel room, my cheek to his shoulder, I was drawing random patterns on his chest with my fingertips while my eyes watched.
Sam was drawing random patterns on my hip but I doubted his eyes were watching.
After Sam kissed me, he dragged me out of the house, down the street and he hailed a cab. Then he shoved me in it, told the driver his hotel and ordered me to text Celeste to let her know I wouldn’t be home until the next morning. Late the next morning. And when I went there, it was only to pick up my stuff.
I texted Celeste, the taxi took us to Sam’s hotel then Sam dragged me out of the cab and up to his room.
The door barely closed before he was kissing me. Half my clothes were gone before we got to the bed.
And there we stayed for hours as Sam welcomed me home and I returned the favor.
Now was now.
And I was watching my hand move on his fantastic chest thinking a year ago I had nothing and now I had everything.
Everything.
And I wasn’t talking about millions of dollars, a ridiculously expensive robe and a beach house.
All that could be gone and the man who was lying beside me all that was left and I’d still be a girl with everything.
On this thought, Sam’s voice came to me.
“You want it all?”
I stopped drawing, lifted my head and looked at him to see his eyes on me.
They were sober.
All he gave me before, he wasn’t done.
Oh man.
Well, the only answer to his question was affirmative.
I wanted it all. The dark, the light, the good, the bad, the laughter, the fights.
All of it.
When it came to Sam, I was greedy that way.
So I lifted up, shifted and then settled down mostly on his chest, my gaze never leaving his.
Then I whispered, “Yes.”
“I’m in a situation.”
Great. He was not an ex-commando, he was a current one.
This could mean anything.
“What situation?” I asked carefully.
“Got a dead best friend, a dead brother and now, lyin’ on me, a woman who’s worth it. I don’t need the money so I don’t need the work. It’s time to leave the unit.”