Goddess of Love (Goddess Summoning #5)(74)

The thought shocked him. He'd never seriously considered a future with any of his lovers or girlfriends or whatever they called themselves. Venus was different. She made him feel different. And it wasn't just because she was incredibly beautiful and witty and intelligent and kind. She had that elusive something. Actually they had that elusive something - together. That extra spark that changed friendship to love and lovers to soul mates.

Soul mates? Was that what they were? The idea shook him, but he didn't back away from it. Everything within him was telling him insistently, This is the one! She's mine! The one I've been waiting for!

He grabbed his bathrobe and hurried down the stairs. She didn't notice him until he touched her shoulder, then she jumped and wiped at her eyes hastily. Cali meowed shortly at him, and jumped haughtily off the couch. Little traitor, he thought.

"I didn't mean to startle you." She was wearing the sweater he'd had on last night. It was way too big for her, making her look young and very, very sexy.

"Do you have coffee?" she asked.

He frowned. Did he have coffee? He didn't want to talk about coffee. He wanted to take her in his arms and tell her he loved her and that he would fix whatever it was that was making her cry, but her tears threw him off, almost as much as his thoughts of soul mates and futures.

"Yeah, I have coffee," was what he said instead.

"Would you make me some?"

"Yes." Thoroughly confused, he went to the kitchen and started a pot of coffee. "Do you want a muffin or something to eat?" he called.

"No," she said. "No, thank you."

He ground his teeth together. She was being awfully damn polite. He waited impatiently for enough coffee to brew to fill two cups, and then hurriedly returned to Venus. She was still sitting on the couch, still staring at his sculpture, but she'd stopped crying.

"Is black okay? I have milk and sugar if you want it."

"Thank you, it's fine like this." She took the cup from him and sipped. Griffin sat next to her and, on impulse, leaned over and kissed her softly. "Good morning." He was pleased that she leaned into him and accepted his kiss.

"Good morning," she said.

They drank their coffee in silence until Griffin couldn't stand it any longer. Then he put his cup down and turned to her.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

She sighed. "It's hard for me to put into words."

"Is it me? Did I do something to upset you?"

"No. You've been perfect."

Well, hell. She said it like it was a bad thing. He drew a deep breath and asked the question he dreaded. "Are you sorry about last night?"

"No, of course not!" She finally looked at him. "Last night was wonderful."

He brushed his knuckles across her damp cheek. "Then why are you sitting here crying?"

She looked back at his sculpture. "You were right," she said slowly.

"About?"

"About Venus."

"And that makes you sad?"

She nodded. "It makes me sad because recently I've realized that I have too much in common with her."

"What do you mean?" For some reason her words, or maybe it was the resigned sound of them, made his stomach tense.

"You said that it seemed Venus didn't need a man, which made her untouched and untouchable, which is especially tragic because Venus is Love."

It was his turn to nod.

"I've been like that." She sounded introspective, almost as if she'd forgotten he was there and was simply talking aloud to herself. "I've helped countless others find love. I've been asked over and over again to make their passions and obsessions and desires come true, but when it came to me having those things in my own life..." She moved her shoulders restlessly. "Love has brushed by me, passed over me, gone around me, and sometimes even visited me briefly, but in the end Love moved on without me."

Griffin took her hand, and she turned to face him. Never in his life had he wanted anything as badly as he wanted to make the sadness leave her eyes, and as he tried to figure out what to say to her to make her melancholy better, he realized that his well-guarded freedom from relationships and his avoidance of love in general had been nothing more than empty steps taken in a life only partially lived. He wondered, briefly, if the artist in him hadn't recognized his loneliness long before now - wondered if maybe that was why the subject of most of his art was women...even though commitment and relationships were what he'd avoided so diligently for most of his life.

Griffin realized that he was afraid to say what came next, but he was more afraid of not saying it.

"I've never been married. I've never even been engaged. The truth is I've avoided love as much as you have. After seeing my sisters' and my mother's troubles with it, I thought it was best to just live without the damn emotion."

At the mention of his sisters, Venus's lips tilted up, lightening the sadness in her expression a little. Griffin forged ahead.

"Then I met you. And now I see a chance to have what's been missing in my life. I see the chance to have love."

"Even if love comes with complications and troubles and...how did you put it...too much damn emotion?"

He smiled and caressed her cheek again. "Even if."