Games of the Heart (The 'Burg #4)(96)

I saw with Clarisse’s reaction there was another dynamic at play in the Haines household. Rees felt overshadowed by the number of her brother’s clear talents. She bickered with her brother but good-naturedly so I didn’t feel it was the dysfunction I had with Debbie. It wasn’t No rubbing in his abilities and popularity.

It was something else.

And I figured I knew what it was.

Things were coming clearer with Rees. She had a Dad who adored her, a brother she was close to but no mother who recognized and praised her. Daddy’s little girl and big brother’s little sister, those were a given if you had them all your life. But Mom could guide you on the journey to understanding who you were and help you cement your value as a woman.

Audrey Haines was not doing that and Clarisse was lost.

Treading cautiously, I said, “That’s okay, honey. Not your gig, not your gig.”

We lapsed into silence.

Then, “No said you’d teach us how to ride horses.”

“Sure,” I glanced at her, “you want that?”

She nodded.

I looked down at the clay. “Wanna start Saturday?”

“That’d be cool.”

I shot her a grin, “Then we’re starting Saturday.”

She grinned back.

I looked back at my wheel. “Doing me a favor. My baby girls like company. They’ll love you.”

“Awesome,” she whispered.

More silence.

Then, “Um…Dusty?”

“Yeah?”

“I, uh, have some jeans to take back. And my grandparents sent some money. I really like that bracelet you bought me and I don’t wanna know what it costs or anything but I’d like to know where you got it. Would you, um…maybe like to, uh…go shoppin’ with me?”

That time, I shot her a smile. “Fan…freaking…tastic. I’d love that. My girl Jerra is down in Texas and I don’t have anyone to shop with me here. We’ll kick some mall butt then we’ll do something girlie like drink seven thousand calorie coffee drinks and people watch. After your horseback riding lesson Saturday. Is that a plan?”

She smiled and it was genuine, no hesitancy, her beautiful brown eyes alight. “Definitely.”

I looked back down at my wheel, muttering, “Something to look forward to.”

“Cool,” she whispered then more silence then, “Uh…I, well, you know, you’re teachin’ me to ride your horses and takin’ me shoppin’ and all and maybe…” she trailed off and I positioned my hands so even though the clay kept moving the shape would not change and my eyes hit her.

Softly, I said, “Clarisse, honey, you’ll learn as you get to know me but there is nothing you can’t talk to me about, nothing you can’t ask. I can’t say yes to everything and you gotta know, no matter what we talk about, I’ll be honest, straight up. And some of my honesty you may not wanna hear. But I’ll be nice about it. Always. So if you have something to say or ask, say it. I have all the time in the world for you, honey, I promise. So take it. It’s yours.”

She stared at me, lips parted then blurted, “I want you to teach me how to do my makeup like you did it for my birthday party. No one ever…” She paused then finished on a rush, “I taught myself and I’m not very good at it. But you are. So I thought, if you don’t mind, you could teach me.”

I felt something hit my throat and it burned at the same time it took everything I had to keep my hands where they were on the vase and not get up, hunt Audrey f**king Haines down and kick her goddamned ass.

In front of me, a fifteen year old who had no idea the force of her beauty had been cast adrift.

It wasn’t about makeup.

It was about everything.

I shuddered to think what happened when Rees started her period. Her friends probably gave her advice and the very thought scared the hell out of me. Mike could not go there. He didn’t want to, for one thing. For another, he knew the workings of the female body but I doubted he could extol the virtues of tampons versus pads or different tampons versus other tampons and vice versa with pads. He could not commiserate with, educate about and thus help alleviate cramps. He could not discuss mood swings, how to feel them coming on and how to attempt to control them.

Fucking Audrey Fucking Haines.

Bitch.

“New plan. You come Saturday morning, I teach you to ride horses. Then we clean up and I give you pointers on how to make beauty even more beautiful. After we wring that miracle, we go to the mall, try on a bunch of stuff, trade out your jeans, drink coffee and people watch. We on?”

She grinned at me and whispered, “Yeah.”

“Excellent,” I murmured then looked back at the vase.

There was more silence. This lasted longer.

It lasted so long I was about to fill it when Rees piped up, “Dusty?”

“Baby,” I whispered, grinning to my vase, “I haven’t moved.”

She giggled.

I liked it. It was soft and beautiful just like her voice.

Then she asked, “You said I can talk to you about anything?”

“Yep.”

“Um…Fin asked me out.”

My hands slid through the clay, ruining the vase and Clarisse jumped.

“Oh no!” she cried, her eyes filled with horror. “I made you ruin it!”