Four Years Later (One Week Girlfriend #4)(74)

“She hates me.” I pause because I’m finding it hard to breathe. “She doesn’t even kn-know m-me.” My teeth are chattering and I will them to stop. I refuse to fall apart in front of him. He shouldn’t matter so much.

But he does.

“She hates me, too.” He exhales roughly and hangs his head. “And I don’t think she really knows me either,” he mumbles.

I stare at him, dumbfounded. I wonder if I really know him. Did I ever? I believed I did. Only a few minutes ago, I thought I did. “Where’s Fable?”

“Back at my house, chasing our mom out of there.” His expression crumples and I swear, he looks close to crying. My already broken heart threatens to crack deeper and I take a sharp breath, trying to keep everything together. “I should’ve told her Mom was back,” he says. “I’ve kept it from her for months.”

“You should’ve told the both of us. You should’ve been honest with me, Owen.” I turn on my heel and start to walk but he doesn’t chase after me. Not that I expected him to, but … well. Fine.

I did expect him to.

Turning, I look at him. He’s still standing in the same place I left him, in front of someone’s house, standing next to a white picket fence and staring at me as if he can’t believe I would leave him.

But he leaves me no choice.

“So you’re a drug addict, too,” I whisper, wrapping my arms around myself.

He winces. “I smoke pot sometimes. It’s no big deal.”

“You smoke pot more than I think you let on.” I pause. “Is it a problem for you?”

He says nothing, which is answer enough. We both remain quiet and I want to walk away, but I can’t.

I’m not strong enough. Not yet.

“You haven’t been honest with me either and you know it.” His voice is so cold. “You have your secrets. Just like I have mine.”

I say nothing because he’s right. I do have my secrets. But he wouldn’t understand. Not now. If I confessed everything to him about Dad, he’d think what he did for his mom was okay. He’d think I understand because of my no-good father. That I’d have no problem with Owen for enabling her. Giving his mom drugs, giving her money, keeping their relationship from Fable, from everyone. It wouldn’t be fair.

My secret will remain my secret.

“You can’t walk away from me like this, Chels,” he says. “Give me another chance.”

“I don’t want to be with someone who gets high all the time,” I murmur. “You’re just trying to escape your reality. And that makes me feel like you’re trying to escape me.”

“Never,” he whispers. “So I get high. So what? It’s no big deal, right? I can quit whenever I want. I haven’t smoked much this past week.”

Only a week. I just … I don’t even know what to think.

“You’re not who I thought you were, Owen Maguire. Not at all,” I say.

“Neither are you.”

I flinch. Those three words lash at my heart. Tear at my soul. I waver, my knees threatening to buckle, and I press my lips together to stifle my cry.

And with that, I turn and run. Escaping my troubles, my problems, the boy I love.

Same difference.

Owen

“It’s been a week, man.” Wade’s voice reaches deep within me, grabbing at my insides and trying to wake me up. “You need to get the f**k out of bed and start living again.”

No. Hell, no. That sounds like a nightmare. I’d rather stay in bed and sleep. Or wake up and drink. Smoke a little. Get high. Forget the pain. Forget Mom is mad at me. That Fable’s mad at me and won’t talk to me. Forget that Chelsea hates me.

“Where’s Des?” I croak, reaching toward my bedside table and knocking over the half-empty beer bottle that was sitting there, the golden liquid spilling all over the carpet. “Shit.”

“He’s gone. I kicked him out last night. Told him I was sick of how he’s keeping you on the shit when we should be getting you off it. I was wrong about him and you were right. Des is our friend but I’m tired of dealing with his … dealing.” Wade walks farther into my bedroom, his nose wrinkling in disgust. “It f**king stinks in here.”

It does. Like beer and weed and sweat and desperation. “I need Des.”

“You don’t need anything Des can give you, trust me.” Wade strides toward my window and yanks the blinds open, letting in the early afternoon light. I hiss like a f**king vampire, my entire body recoiling as though I’m going to disintegrate into a pile of dust the moment sun makes contact with my skin.

“Why the hell did you do that, ass**le?” I sit up in bed, squinting my eyes against the brightness while rubbing the back of my neck. It aches. Everything aches. I’ve hardly left this room, let alone the house, since the night Mom ruined my life.

Correction. Since the night I ruined my life.

“Because you need to see some light instead of sleeping the day away. After you put in all that time trying to get your grades up and you actually f**king did it, you let it all go straight to hell over a girl.” Wade says the last word with disgust.

“Three girls, really,” I say, thumping the back of my head against the wall. Mom, Fable, and Chelsea.