Fools Rush in(31)

“It’s cream,” Katie gritted out, slapping our plates onto a tray with a clatter. “Would you like to inspect the cow?” She stomped off. God, I was so sorry I had to put her through this. Hopefully, we could have a laugh later on. Maybe she would forgive me. Maybe if I took Mike and Corey for an overnight…or a month.

Lorenzo and I were alone again. Although I now knew that I never wanted to see Lorenzo of the Crabs again, I also sensed that we were being watched. By Joe. With a sigh, I leaned forward and fake smiled. “So, Lorenzo, do you have brothers or sisters?” I asked.

“Yes,” he answered, still looking pissy. “Two brothers and two sisters.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” I said, though, based on his expression, it was not. Toying with my fork, I laughed again, hoping it looked as if we were having fun. “I have a sister.”

“Really.”

And speaking of my sister, in came her ex-husband! In his uniform, no less! How handsome he looked, how alpha and official! Oh, yes—I remembered now. Sam had to check on me. I took another slug of vodka and tonic, watching Katie greet Sam and gesture my way. Sam came over to the table.

“Hello, Officer,” I said, turning my head to look up at him. Whee! The room spun and my vision blurred.

“Hello,” Sam answered. He looked at Lorenzo in his cop way, assessing, judging, intimidating. “Is that car with the Florida plates yours?” he demanded, very bad-cop. Unfortunately, his question epitomized the Cape Cod accent that Lorenzo found so amusing, coming out as Is that cah with the Flarrider plates yaws? And Lorenzo, the ass**le, smirked.

Sam flicked his glance to me. “You left your lights on, buddy. Battery’s dying.” With that, Sam left the table.

“Whoops,” I said, pleased beyond belief. “I’ll give you a jump. Well, your battery, anyway.”

Katie came over with our cheesecake and coffee. She tossed down the little bowl of creamers—light cream—and quickly left. Lorenzo picked up his fork and watched her go.

“Boy,” he said. “That waitress is a real bi—”

“Okay, hotshot,” I interrupted, smacking my hands down on the table and standing up. “Get out.”

“Excuse me?” Lorenzo said snottily. “Are you crazy? I’m not going anywhere.”

“That bitchy waitress,” I ground out, “happens to be my best friend. You’ve been sitting here all night, insulting everyone around you, complaining and whining about how nobody likes you, and I’ll tell you why. Because you’re an ass. Now go. I’ll pay for dinner. It will be worth it just to get rid of you.”

The restaurant had fallen absolutely silent.

“Well, too bad,” Lorenzo said, glancing around at the frozen patrons and leaning back arrogantly in his chair. “I’m not going anywhere.”

What to do but pull out the trump card?

“Officer!” I called. “This man is disturbing my peace.”

That was enough for my brother-in-law. He came over instantly.

“Let’s go, pal,” Sam said, taking Lorenzo’s arm.

“But she—I didn’t—this has to be against the law,” Lorenzo stammered. I enjoyed a thrill of appreciation as Sam, my hero, hauled Crab-Man out of his chair and guided him to the door, which was held open by a smiling Katie. As they left, the customers began applauding.

I looked around, adrenaline zinging through my elbows and knees. My face began to burn. Had I really just…Was everyone really…? There was Joe, clapping along with the rest of them, laughing and nodding.

“Thank you,” I said, wobbling drunkenly. “I’ll be here all week.”

And then I plopped back into my chair, covering my mouth with my hands, laughing as the applause died down. Katie came over, swiping a clean fork from an empty table. She sat down. “Thanks for defending my honor,” she said dryly. “Christ, what a jerk.”

I smiled at her, my throat closing with drunken love. She took a bite of my cheesecake.

“Dinner’s on the house, Millie!” called Chris. More clapping. I waved my thanks. When Sam came back in, there was yet another round of applause. He came over, pulled up a chair and helped himself to Lorenzo’s untouched cheesecake.

“I think I deserve this,” he said, grinning.

“Taste better than donuts?” I asked. “And thank you for saving me, Officer Sam.”

“Got yourself a spine, there, Millie,” he answered. “And you’re welcome.”

And then, yup, you guessed it, Joe Carpenter came over.

“Wow, Millie,” he said, also pulling up a chair. “What did he do?”

“Joe,” I said, pretending to be casual though my heart was soaring, “some guys just need an ass-whipping. Are you one of them?” My toes curled in my shoes as I smiled.

He laughed. “Not me, Millie, not me. Way to go, though. Right, Sam?”

Sam just nodded.

“Joe, I saw your truck at Mrs. Bianco’s house the other day,” I said casually, carefully enunciating. “Are you doing some work for her?” Mrs. Bianco, an ancient little old lady who used two canes to get around, lived around the block from my parents.

“Well,” Joe replied, ducking his head bashfully, “not really. I was just fixing her back stairs. They looked a little wobbly.”