Fever (Breathless #2)(72)

She spun around, laughing as they landed on her nose and cheeks and caught in her hair. He was transfixed by the picture she presented. So lovely she took his breath away.

“Do you know, this is the first time I’ve ever been excited about snow?” she said in a wistful voice. “Before, I knew if it snowed I’d be cold and wet and I’d never get warm. But now? I can enjoy the beauty and elegance of snowfall because I know I’ll be warm and dry afterward.”

The simple words cut him to the quick. It physically hurt him that she’d led such a spartan, lonely existence. He didn’t know how she’d survived. If he thought too long about what could have happened to her, he came undone. He tried to focus on the fact that the past no longer mattered. That she was here with him and he wasn’t letting her go. That she never had to go back to that life.

But it wasn’t so simple, because that life had shaped her, made her into what she was today. She had wounds that hadn’t healed. Scars that ran soul deep. Insecurities that only time would appease.

He pulled her roughly into his arms, wanting her against him, more to comfort him than her. She was a lot more accepting of her past circumstances than he was.

“Thank you for this,” she whispered. “I’ll never forget tonight. The tree is beautiful. And that I got to see it with someone who cares about me . . .”

Care? He didn’t goddamn care. He loved her. With every part of himself. It was crazy. Insane. Lunatic, even. Shit like this didn’t happen in real life. You didn’t meet a woman and fall instantly and completely in love with her after only knowing her a little over a week.

But it did and he had.

Jesus.

“Jace?”

Her worried voice cut through his thoughts.

“Is something wrong?”

He slid his hand over her cheek and then bent his neck to kiss her. “Nothing’s wrong, baby. Things couldn’t be more right.”

She smiled, her eyes brightening and reflecting the glowing lights. Then she leaned up on tiptoes and kissed him. It was rare that she initiated any affection with him. Not because she didn’t want to. But she was reticent. Always conscious of doing the wrong thing at the wrong time.

He lived for times just like this, when she forgot to worry about doing the wrong thing and she just let herself go.

Her lips moved warm over his, a contrast to the cold. So damn sweet. He wrapped his arms around her, lifting her so their mouths were on the same level. She laughed in delight as her feet dangled down his legs. Resting her arms on his shoulders, she looped her hands around his nape and then kissed him again.

“This was the best Christmas ever.”

He smiled. “I’m glad.”

Her expression sobered and the light died in her eyes. “I’m sorry I ruined things at your sister’s.”

“You didn’t ruin things, baby,” he said gently. “It was a lot to ask of you. I should have introduced you to them separately and before I threw you to the wolves at Christmas. I wasn’t thinking. I was too caught up in wanting you to meet them and spend time with them.”

She pressed her forehead to his and sighed softly over his lips. “I’m working on it, Jace. I swear I am. I’m trying not to overthink things and freak out. I want to be someone you can be proud of.”

At that his frown was fierce and quick. “I am proud of you, damn it,” he growled. “There isn’t a single goddamn thing about you that I’m ashamed of.”

“Okay, so maybe I want to be someone I can be proud of,” she whispered.

He squeezed her and then slowly put her back on the ground again. “One day you’ll see you like I see you, baby. If it’s the last thing I do, I’m going to make it happen.”

She turned up her face and then stuck out her tongue to catch a drifting snowflake. Her laughter rang out when one melted in her mouth.

He suddenly wanted nothing more than to have his dick where that snowflake had been. Him melting on her tongue. Him coming all over her mouth.

Despite the cold and the snow, heat flushed through his body. Sweat bathed him.

“We’re going now,” he ground out.

“Okay,” she whispered.

“My place.”

“Okay.”

“I’m going to f**k you senseless, Bethany.”

“O-kay.”

Her response was shaky and drawn out but her eyes told the real story. She was excited. It was all the encouragement he needed.

Grabbing her hand, he tugged her back in the direction of the car. It would take a lot of doing not to f**k her in the backseat of the car. Tonight he would take her his way. Not that the last week hadn’t been his way. He’d definitely dictated the pace, the how and where, but he’d still been . . . conservative.

Even after she’d been clear in that she would be a willing participant to whatever he wanted to do to her, he’d still held back, because he was deathly afraid of screwing up.

But enough of that. Maybe if he’d been more forceful she wouldn’t still be so insecure. She was a woman who needed stability and security above all else. She needed structure. Routine. All the things she’d been denied.

She needed love.

His love.

They got into the car and for the entire drive to his apartment, it was silent and tense. Sexual awareness was taut and crackling, a tangible aura that surrounded them. Bethany’s eyes glowed in the dim light cast by passing streetlights. Her hair was delectably mussed and her lips were swollen from his kisses. Just the way he liked them.