Fantastical (Fantasyland #3)(14)

“I’ve decided I like eating bunny and my nightgown is perfectly fine, thank you,” I snapped, wrapping my arms around my belly protectively.

“You’ll need a bath. You like to bathe, I reckon.”

Oh shit.

I did, indeed, like to bathe. Actually, I was hoping I wasn’t already ripe.

“Noc –”

“You’ve earned breakfast with what you gave me on the hides. It was so good, love, you earned a trip to the river too. Anything else you want, you work for.”

I unwrapped my arms from my belly and planted my hands on my hips, leaning forward slightly myself.

“How much more of a jerk can you be?” I asked.

“Why don’t you see?” he returned.

“Ugh!” I grunted, my arms shooting straight down, my hands in fists, my head going back so I could stare in disgust at the ceiling. Then my chin tipped down sharply and I glared at him. “I hate you!” I yelled.

“You already told me that.”

“Well, I hate you more than I hated you before.”

“I don’t really care.”

“And I hated you a lot before,” I informed him.

“I repeat, I don’t really care.”

“Well, you’ve made that clear,” I snapped.

His head tilted to the side and he grinned.

“Is there something you need to do?” he asked.

“Plot your murder?” I replied.

His grin turned to a smile and it sucked that it was hot.

“Other than that.”

Yes, there was something I needed to do and that something was go to the bathroom. Then bathe (in the river, for God’s sake, yikes!). Then eat.

And I needed him for all those things, I was guessing. I mean, I could do the first and second myself but he had to protect me from vickrants or whatever else was out there while I did it.

I glared at him. He held my glare calmly.

Then I tore my eyes from his and asked myself out loud, “Why did I kiss this jerk? Why? Damn my pride! Damn it to hell!”

“I take it that means you agree to the terms of our continuing relationship,” he remarked and my gaze cut back to him.

“Jerk!”

His eyebrows went up. “Are you saying you don’t?”

“Go to hell!”

He shrugged and then moved to his shirt. “You could, of course, go forth on your own. The vickrants will be hunting you or The Shrew may send toilroys.” He shook his head and I didn’t like the idea of toilroys. Vickrants were bad enough. Furthermore, I didn’t know who The Shrew was but any shrew, I knew, was bad news.

Damn.

He pulled his shirt on as I clipped out, “Fine.”

He turned only his head to me.

“Fine?”

“Fine!” I snapped.

He grinned.

I glared.

He grabbed his boots and tugged them on.

When he straightened, he extended his arm to the hide-covered opening.

“Fancy a bath?”

I growled under my breath and stomped to the hides.

From behind me I heard a manly chuckle.

Seriously, I freaking hated this world!

Chapter Six

Written in the Sky

I had a plan.

It probably wasn’t going to work but at least I had a plan.

See, Noctorno took me outside into the overcast day. He also took me somewhere secluded and gave me privacy while I attended to nature’s call while I was in nature – not my favorite thing in this world or my own, in fact, I never did it in my own but once and that was bad enough so I never did it again. But it was the call of nature and nature was my only choice so I answered the call.

Then he took me back to the cave, lifted me onto his horse, Salem (who seemed to snort his greeting at me though I couldn’t sense this like I could sense what Aggie meant when he chirped, it was only the impression I got), he got on Salem behind me and we took what seemed to be a long ride to the river.

My bath wasn’t all I’d hoped it would be seeing as he took off his boots and waded in with me, we both got in fully-clothed, we had no soap and although the river was gorgeous (regardless of the gray day) and crystal clear, it was danged cold.

Sopping wet, we rode back, he stoked the fire while I sat by it, hugging my knees shivering then he informed me he’d be back and he took off.

That was when I decided on my plan. I sat there pulling my stiff fingers through my hair, detangling it and hopefully drying it as I alternately got up and fed fuel to the fire and decided what to do to get out of my latest dire predicament.

I was going to tell the truth.

He’d likely think I was mad but I didn’t care.

I had to do something.

I heard hooves on stone and knew he was back.

I bit my lip and felt a thrill race up my spine. I didn’t know if this thrill was fear or something else and I didn’t think about it.

I had to concentrate on what I would say to get him to believe me.

The hides were swept back and he walked in looking great even though his shirt was wrinkled and his hair was mussed. Or, maybe it was because of the latter. He was also carrying two jugs hooked to just one finger with the rest of his fingers wrapped around a rough sack and another rough sack in his other hand. He dropped the sacks and put the jugs on the table.