Fallen Too Far (Rosemary Beach #1)(58)

Rush grabbed the blankets underneath me in both hands and closed his eyes tightly. "No. No. Please, don't."

I wanted to reach up and touch his face. To tell him it would be okay. He'd move on and get over this. Us. But I couldn't do that. How could I comfort him if I was empty inside?

Rush pulled out of me and I winced at the hollowness that echoed through my body. He stood up and didn't look at me. I watched in silence as he began to dress himself. This was it. Was empty supposed to hurt? When would the pain stop showing up?

Once he had his shirt back on he lifted his eyes to look at me. I sat up and pulled my knees against my chest to cover my nudity and to hold myself together. I was afraid I might literally crumble.

"I can't make you forgive me. I don't deserve your forgiveness. I can't change the past. All I can do is give you what you want. If this is what you want, I'll walk away, Blaire. It'll kill me but I'll do it."

What else could there be? I'd never be the same. The girl he'd fallen in love with was no more. He'd see that soon enough if he stayed. I didn't have a past. I didn't have a foundation. It was all gone. Nothing made sense and I knew it never would. Rush deserved more.

"Goodbye, Rush," I said one last time.

The pain that clouded his eyes was too much. I dropped my gaze from his and studied the blue plaid blanket beneath me.

I listened as he walked toward the door. His footsteps were muffled on the old faded carpet. Then the door opened and the moonlight poured into the dark room. There was a pause. I wondered if he would say more. I didn't want him to. Every word he said only made this harder.

The door closed. I lifted my eyes to see the empty motel room surrounding me. Goodbyes weren't all they were cracked up to be. I knew that now.