Existence (Existence Trilogy #1)(45)
Then I saw him. He stepped out of the darkness and walked directly into the fire. I broke free of Leif’s hold and ran toward the fire. He was here. Dank was here.
“Pagan, NO!” Leif’s voice called from behind me.
“STOP HER!” Miranda called out in a panicked voice, but I couldn’t stop. Dank was here! He was in there. The fire wouldn’t hurt him. I understood now. Arms wrapped around me and pulled me back as I fought against them.
“No, stop, I can’t — I need to get there! I need to see,” I begged as I struggled against Leif’s arms while never taking my eyes off the burning car. Dank emerged with two people by his side. It was a young couple. I started to call out his name as Leif held me tightly in his arms, unyielding.
“Please, please let me go. I need to go,” I begged, watching as Dank stopped and stared back at me. His eyes were a glowing, brilliant blue in the darkness as he watched me struggle and call out to him from Leif’s arms. He was there, so close, and the people beside him stood staring back at the burning car they had just escaped. He turned from me and with a wave of his hand all three of them were gone. I watched in horror as the darkness returned. The car continued to burn and I heard fire trucks drawing closer.
“Come on, Pagan, come back, baby,” Leif whispered in my ear.
“They’re dead,” I whispered, knowing why Dank had come.
Leif pulled me against him and held me in a tight hug. I let him. He had no idea what I’d just seen. No one did. All they saw was the burning vehicle. I had just seen the beautiful soul who had stolen my heart emerge from the darkness and take the souls of the people inside the burning car. He wasn’t a normal soul. He’d always told me he was different. I understood now what he meant. He was different.
His existence was cold and lonely. A sob wracked my body and I crumpled against Leif’s body. I wept at the realization that Dank was never given a chance to love. He lived within the sadness. He had to walk hand and hand with death. I heard Leif’s voice attempting to comfort me but I couldn’t accept his words. Nothing he said made any of this okay.
Dank wasn’t given a chance at life and happiness. My breathing came in gasps from the pain shooting through my heart. It was all too much. I had a limit and I was positive I’d just reached it.
“No, sir, she isn’t hurt. We weren’t close enough to the car and we all were wearing our seatbelts when I ran the Hummer into the mountain. She isn’t handling what we just witnessed well….” Leif’s voice trailed off.
An unfamiliar voice spoke from behind me. “She needs to be taken in and given some meds to calm her down. That kind of emotional trauma can leave devastating effects.” I tightened my hold on Leif. I couldn’t go to the hospital now. I didn’t want to see more sickness or lost souls. I shook my head violently against his chest.
“She’s terrified and I can’t just let her go without me. I can’t leave her.” I heard Leif argue.
“You can ride with her but she needs some medical attention. This is not a normal way of dealing with something like this. The other girl is handling it well. This one seems to be losing it.”
“Okay, but I’m not letting go of her.” Leif said with finality to his voice.
“I don’t want to go to a hospital,” I said, panicked. I pushed away from Leif, trying to get away so I could run to someone safe; someone who wouldn’t make me go. No one understood what I would see there. What I’d seen tonight.
“No, don’t,” I heard Leif protest and I thought for a moment he was talking to me when I felt the prick of a needle and the world went hazy before it faded to black.
* * * *
“No, they gave her a shot to knock her out. I tried to stop them but it happened before I could do anything.” I heard Leif’s voice in the darkness.
“I’ve called her mother and she’s terribly worried. I told her not to come. I’m having us flown out of here in a few hours.” Mrs. Montgomery’s voice sounded concerned.
“How are Miranda and Wyatt?” Leif asked before fingers gently caressed my arms. I knew it was his touch.
“Both are doing fine. Miranda’s fine. She’s very worried about Pagan. I reassured her Pagan was just resting.” There were a few minutes of silence. I let the caressing touch from Leif comfort me. It helped fight the horror I was only barely containing. I knew there was pain waiting for me but I wasn’t ready to face it.
“Honey, is she always this unstable? I realize it was a horrible thing to witness, but for her to completely fall apart like this, well, do you think she has some mental issues you might be unaware of?” Leif didn’t say anything at first and I wondered if he’d shook his head or shrugged.
I heard him sigh. “I don’t know, Mom,” he said quietly.
Leif always seemed completely blind to my problems. I’d always wondered if he’d just not noticed the way I’d stare and watch things he couldn’t see. Then there were my major mood swings he always seemed to overlook. Maybe he’d seen more than I realized. A swell of panic tightened my chest as I realized that I may be losing Leif too. This time he wouldn’t be able to ignore my serious issues. I wasn’t normal. I never had been.
“You may need to really think about your relationship with her. It isn’t healthy to get involved with someone who is this emotionally vulnerable. People this weak emotionally can be dangerous.” Leif‘s hand stopped caressing my arm.