Elsewhere(32)

Liz nods tensely. She watches Betty's red car drive away, fighting the urge to run after it. The Division of Domestic Animals is housed in a large A-frame building across the street from the Registry. The building is known as the Barn. Liz knows she has to go inside, but she finds she can't move. She breaks into a sweat, and her stomach feels jittery. Somehow, it reminds her of the first day of school. She takes a deep breath and walks to the entrance. After all, the only way to absolutely ensure things will go badly is to be late.

Liz opens the door. She sees a harried woman with kind green eyes and a mass of frizzy red hair.

The woman's denim overalls are covered in a mix of dog hair, cat hair, and what appears to be greenish feathers. She holds out her hand for Liz to shake. "I'm Josey Wu, the head of the DDA.

Are you Aldous's friend Elizabeth?"

"Liz."

"Hope you don't mind dog hair, Liz."

"Nah, it's just a little present dogs like to leave behind."

Josey smiles. "Well, we've got a lot to do today, Liz, and you can start by changing into these."

She tosses Liz a pair of denim overalls.

In the bathroom where Liz changes into the overalls, a medium-sized, rather rangy, blondish dog of indeterminate lineage (in other words, a mutt) is drinking from a toilet.

"Hey, girl," Liz says to the dog, "you don't have to drink from there."

The dog looks up at her. After a moment, the dog cocks her head curiously and speaks. "Isn't that what it's for?" she asks. "Why else would they fill a low basin thingy with water? You can even get fresh water by pressing this little handle, right?" The dog demonstrates, flushing the toilet with her left paw.

"No," says Liz gently, "it's actually a toilet."

"Toilet?" the dog asks. "What's that?"

"Well, it's a place where people go."

"Go? Go where?"

"Not where,'' Liz says delicately.

The dog looks at the bowl. "Good Lord," she says, "you mean to say all this time I've been drinking from a place where humans pee and . . . ?" She looks on the verge of throwing up. "Why didn't anyone ever tell me? I've been drinking from toilets for years. I never knew. They always had the door closed."

"Here," says Liz, "let me get you some fresh water from the sink." Liz locates a little bowl and fills it with water. "Here, girl!"

The dog laps up the water excitedly. After she is finished, she licks Liz on the leg. "Thanks. Now that I'm thinking about it, I think my two-leggers tried to tell me about the whole toilet thing before.

My man, Billy he was called, was quite conscientious about shutting the lid." Lick lick lick. "Had I known, I certainly would have stopped drinking from toilets a long time ago," she says. "I'm Sadie, by the way. What are you called?"

"Liz."

"Nice to meet you, Liz." Sadie holds out her paw for Liz to shake. "I just died last week. It's weird here."

"How did you die?" Liz asks.

"I was chasing a ball and I got hit by a car," Sadie says.

"I was hit by a car, too," says Liz, "only I was on a bike."

"Did you have a dog?" Sadie wants to know.

"Oh yes, Lucy was my best friend in the whole world."

"You want a new dog?" Sadie cocks her head.

"You mean you, don't you, girl?" Liz asks.

Sadie lowers her head shyly.

"I don't know if my grandmother will let me, but I'll ask tonight, all right?"

Josey enters the bathroom. "Great, Liz, I'm glad to see you met Sadie," Josey says as she scratches the dog between the ears. "Sadie is your first advisee."

Sadie nods her soft yellow head.

"Aldous didn't mention you speak Canine, by the way," Josey says.

"About that," Liz stammers, "I don't."

"What do you mean?" asks Josey. "I just heard you have a whole conversation with Sadie."

And then it dawns on Liz. She was speaking to Sadie.

Liz grins. "I've never spoken it before. Or at least, I never knew I was."

"Well, looks like you're a natural. Remarkable! I've only met a handful of natural Canine speakers in my whole life. You're sure you weren't taught somewhere?"

Liz shakes her head. "I just always seemed to understand dogs, and they always seemed to understand me." She thinks of Lucy. She thinks of that dog in the park. "I never knew it was a language, though. I never knew it was a skill."

"Well, looks like you were destined to work here, Liz," Josey says, patting Liz on the back. "Come on, let's step into my office. If you'll excuse us, Sadie."

Sadie looks at Liz. "You'll remember to ask your grandmother, right?"

"I promise." Liz scratches Sadie between the ears and leaves the bathroom.

"So, as a counselor for the Division of Domestic Animals, your job basically entails explaining to the new dog arrivals everything about life on Elsewhere and then placing them in new homes. For some of the dogs, speaking to you will be the first conversation they've ever had with a human. It can get rather hairy, in both senses of the word." This is obviously not the first time Josey has made this joke.