Conspiracy Game (GhostWalkers, #4)(77)

“He would have come after you and he would never—never—have stopped until he found you and got you out—or they killed him. Jack would never abandon someone who did what you did for him.”

“My brother helped him get out of Kinshasa. I just slept with him.”

Ken’s eyes darkened to a turbulent gray. “Don’t do that, Briony. Don’t cheapen what you did and don’t belittle yourself. You saved his life. He told me what happened.”

“He doesn’t owe me anything. If that’s why he’s doing this… ”

“You’re here because you’re carrying his child and he never wanted to walk away from you in the first place. He did it for you. He walked out of your life so you could have a normal life. And this time, if you want out—you’ll have to be the one to walk away, because he isn’t going to do it.”

Briony burst out laughing, but it sounded too close to hysteria, so she hastily crossed to the drawers and began looking through them for something to wear to the doctor’s office. “I don’t have a normal life, Ken. I can’t have a normal life because some megalomaniac dragged me out of an orphanage and experimented on me.” Her voice was getting louder, swinging out of control, but she couldn’t pull back. “And when he adopted me out, he made certain he could still experiment on me. And as an adult—well… ” She threw a sweater into the drawer and spun around, spreading her arms wide to encompass the room. “Here I am. Not like any other mother-to-be. No, I’ve got a man who doesn’t mind having sex with me because of the experiments, but would much rather I didn’t come near him, so no, Ken—my chances at a normal life frankly suck.”

“You in here upsetting my woman, Ken?” The voice was pitched so low—so soft—that for a moment Briony wasn’t certain she’d actually heard right, because those soft-spoken words sounded like a threat, but her body went still and her heart accelerated into high gear.

Jack moved into the room. His shirt was off, and a fine sheen of sweat covered his body as though he’d been working hard. Muscles rippled beneath scarred skin, and he crossed to her side, taking a T-shirt from the top of the bureau and wiping his face with it. He looked at his brother over the shirt, his eyes a peculiar silver.

“I thought you’d already done that,” Ken said easily.

Briony frowned. Ken sounded easygoing enough, but his body shifted slightly into a much more defensible position. She looked from one brother to the other. “Hello! Are you both morons? I’m pregnant. That means emotional. I’m not supposed to be the one with the cool head here. I’m supposed to fall apart at the drop of a hat; it’s my prerogative. You two are supposed to smile and nod and agree with everything I say.”

Ken’s eyebrow shot up, and a ghost of a smile played for a moment with his mouth, and then disappeared. “Was I upsetting you, Briony?”

“I’m in a perpetual state of upset,” she reiterated. “I’ve never been pregnant before. I never even thought about having children.” She sank down onto the bed again, looking up at Jack. “Never. I have such a difficult time being around people, it never occurred to me the opportunity would be there.”

Jack stood in front of her, forcing her chin up with his thumb so she had to meet his gaze. “You want this baby.”

She nodded, swallowing hard. “It’s just scary. Everything is so frightening right now. I wish I wasn’t such a coward.”

The pad of Jack’s thumb rubbed over her lower lip. “It’s all right to be afraid, Briony; fear doesn’t make you a coward. Why shouldn’t you be afraid?” He crouched down in front of her, framing her face. “I want you here more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. And I have every intention of seeing you through this. You came here because you trusted your own instincts. I’m sure your brothers objected.”

A faint smile teased her mouth. “Strenuously objected.”

“But you knew to come to me anyway. I may be a lot of things, Briony, and I’m hell to live with, but you came to me for protection and that is guaranteed. Just keep trusting me.”

Ken came up on the other side of her, looking so heartbreakingly like Jack. He put one hand on his twin’s shoulder and the other on her shoulder. “We’re in this together—all the way, Briony. Here, where we live, we have a policy that it’s okay to be who we really are. Jack gets a little dicey sometimes and I have my own demons. If you’re afraid or sick or want to stand outside and scream, it’s all good.”

Briony nodded, struggling not to cry. She didn’t know what acceptance was. She’d never had it. She had always fit into the circus world because her family needed her to—not because it was her choice. She’d fought every day of her life to appear normal. Here, with Jack and Ken, she felt no pain at all being near them. They both shielded her, not only from their thoughts, but Jack had been able to keep her from feeling the effects of violence up close.

Was it really that simple? She touched their minds and found sincerity. They both had concerns and both were a little leery of the new situation, a woman—nearly a stranger—in their comfortable, safe world, but both were more than willing to accept her and learn how to live with her.

How to live with her. They were willing to adjust for her. Was she willing to adjust for them? She looked up at Jack, at his peculiarly colored eyes that seemed to go from charcoal gray to glittering silver, depending on his mood. Could she put herself totally in his hands? She already liked and respected Ken. She might be willing to try for Jack—but could she hand Jack her heart when she knew the attraction was because of genetic manipulation? She needed to go slow—take one day at a time and see where it led her. She took a deep breath and let it out. “Thank you both.”