Chosen (House of Night #3)(71)

"You have to let me go, now." Stevie Rae's voice was rough and strained and sounded totally unlike her. So it had the desired effect. Damien and the Twins instantly stopped hugging her.

"You do smell funny," Shaunee said, trying to smile through her tears.

"Yeah, not to be mean or anything," Erin said.

"But we don't care," Damien added.

"Hey, nerd herd members who are still alive," Aphrodite called from where she'd retreated to under the big oak tree. "I suggest you step away from the undead dead kid. She bites."

"You bite!" Shaunee snapped.

"Bitch!" Erin said.

"She's telling you the truth," Stevie Rae said. Then she looked from Damien and the Twins to me. "Explain it to them."

"Stevie Rae has an issue with blood. She has to have it. Or she gets kinda cranky." Under the tree Aphrodite snorted.

"Tell them the truth," Stevie Rae said.

I sighed in resignation and gave them the short version. "She's just one of a bunch of fledglings who died and then came back like this. They're what killed those Union football players last month. And they almost killed Heath. Getting Heath away from them was how I found out about Stevie Rae. Only she is different than they are. She still has a hold on her humanity."

"But it's slipping," Aphrodite chimed in.

I frowned at her. "Yeah, you could say that. So what we need to do is to heal Stevie Rae so she can be like she used to be."

The Twins and Damien were quiet for what seemed like a long time. And then Damien said, "You've known about this for a month and you haven't said anything to any of us?"

"You let us think that Stevie Rae was dead," Shaunee said.

"You acted like you thought she was dead, too," Erin said.

"Morons! She couldn't tell you. You have no idea what kind of forces are at work here," Aphrodite said.

"You sound like a bad Sci-Fi Channel movie," Shaunee said.

"Yeah, we're not buying, bitch," Erin said.

"You've known about this for a month and you haven't said anything to any of us." This time Damien didn't phrase it like a question.

"Aphrodite is right," I said. "I couldn't tell you about her. There were extenuating circumstances." There still were. It was better for them not to know Neferet was behind the whole thing, even if it made them hate me.

"I don't care what Aphrodite said. We're your friends. Your best friends. You should have told us," Damien said.

"Extenuating circumstances?" Erin said. "Seems Aphrodite is suddenly a part of those circumstances."

"Were there extenuating circumstances when you kept Loren a secret?" Shaunee said. Her voice was guarded. Her dark eyes narrowed at me warily.

I didn't know what to say. I could feel them slipping away from me, and the worst part of the whole thing was that I knew I deserved them to all turn their backs on me.

"How are we supposed to trust you if you keep things from us?" As usual, Damien summed up everyone's feelings in one simple sentence.

"I knew this was a bad idea," Stevie Rae said. "I'm outta here."

"What? You got people to eat-places to terrorize?" Aphrodite said. Stevie Rae spun around and snarled at her. "Maybe I should start with you, hag."

"Jeesh, relax. It was just a question." Aphrodite tried to sound nonchalant, but I could see the fear in her eyes. I grabbed Stevie Rae's hand again and held tight when she tried to pull away. Ignoring her, I looked from Damien to the Twins. "Are you going to help me heal her or not?" After only a little hesitation Damien said, "I'll help you, but I don't trust you anymore."

"Ditto," said the Twins together.

My stomach had rolled back into a sick, tight little ball and I wanted to plop down right there in the grass and cry and beg them, Don't stop being my friends-don't stop trusting me! But I didn't. I couldn't. After all, they were right. Instead I nodded and said, "Okay, let's cast a circle and get her healed."

"We don't have any candles," Damien said.

"I can run and get some," Jack said. He didn't even look at me, but spoke directly to Damien.

"No. We don't have time for that," I said. "We don't need candles. We have the ability to manifest the elements. Candles are just ceremonial." I paused and added, "But I think you should probably go, Jack. I'm not sure what all's going to happen and I don't want to take a chance you might get hurt."

"O-okay," he stuttered. He put his hands in his pockets and walked slowly away.

"Looks like tonight we do away with ceremony," Damien said, giving me a hard look.

"Yeah, tonight we do away with a lot of things." Shaunee was watching me, but it felt like her eyes were those of a stranger. Erin nodded in silent but complete agreement with her. I clamped my jaws shut to keep from screaming my pain and sorrow and fear. My friends were all I had. If I lost them, how would I survive? How would I stand against Neferet? How would I face Loren? How would I deal with the loss of Heath and Erik?

And then I remembered something I'd read in one of the old, musty books I'd been poring through when I was trying to find a magic bullet to help me heal Stevie Rae. A quote from one of the ancient vampyre Amazon High Priestesses had been written under her fierce, beautiful picture. She'd said, Being Chosen of our Goddess is as much pain as it is privilege. I was beginning to understand what that ancient priestess of Nyx had meant.