Burn (Breathless #3)(94)

“I had a lot of issues with the fact that Jace wanted me,” Bethany said quietly. “It baffled me that he turned the city over looking for me after that first night and that he went to such lengths to help me, to provide for me. He, like Ash, could have any woman he wanted. But he wanted me. Just like Ash wants you. We can sit here and analyze it and try to understand it, but at the end of the day, they want who they want and that happens to be us. And Jace made plenty of mistakes along the way, but we worked past those issues and I’m so glad we did because he makes me so happy. I’d never have this with another man. I wouldn’t want to.”

“So you think I’m making too big of a deal out of this,” Josie said ruefully.

Mia shook her head. “No, honey, I don’t. I think it’s obviously important to you and I absolutely think Ash should know that and recognize what he did was wrong. But at the same time, is it something you can’t forgive him for? Because really, what did he do that was so bad? His heart was in the right place even if he went about it all wrong.”

And there it was. In a nutshell. Was it really so unforgivable? Sure, she had a right to be angry, but moving out? Breaking up? That was so . . . permanent.

She dropped her face into her hands. “Oh God. I did overreact.”

Bethany slid her hand over Josie’s back.

“I should have confronted him, absolutely, but I completely overreacted. I shouldn’t have done what I did. Now he’s going to be so pissed at me, and I don’t blame him!”

“He won’t be pissed, Josie,” Mia said softly. “He’ll just be glad to have you back.”

She shook her head miserably. “It’s worse than what you think. He said . . .” She sighed. “He said he loved me and I threw it back at him. I said some pretty horrible things. Like that I couldn’t trust that he wasn’t saying it to manipulate me.”

“Was it the first time he told you?” Bethany asked gently.

Josie nodded.

“Then it’s understandable that you would have reacted the way you did,” Mia said. “Do you love him?”

“Oh yeah,” Josie breathed. “Completely and utterly in love with him.”

Bethany beamed. “There. You love each other. You can work this out. He’ll forgive you and you’ll forgive him.”

“You make it sound so easy,” Josie muttered. “I was such a hysterical twit. I can’t believe I marched into his office and said the things I said. I wish there was a Rewind button and I had it to do all over again.”

“Love isn’t perfect,” Mia said. “We’ve all made mistakes. Gabe, Jace, me, Bethany. And now you and Ash. It’s not supposed to be perfect. It’s what you make it. And you can make it really special, Josie. Go and talk to him. Or call him. Make things right and give him the chance to make things right.”

Some of the heavy weight lifted off Josie’s shoulders. Hope crept in and with it the realization that this wasn’t the end. Nothing Ash had done was unforgiveable. She’d make mistakes. There was no doubt she would. But she absolutely believed that Ash would be a lot more forgiving of her mistakes than she’d been of his.

“Thanks, you guys,” she said, smiling with relief. “I’m going to go home, take a shower and call Ash and hope he’s not too pissed to listen to me apologize.”

Mia smiled back. “Oh, he’ll listen. Come on. Let’s go. We’ll drop you back by your apartment.”

Josie shook her head. “Thanks, but I’ll walk. I need some time to get my thoughts together. I want to get this just right.”

“You sure?” Bethany asked.

“Yeah, I’m sure. It’s not that far and it will give me the chance to work up my nerve to call him.”

“Okay, but you have to swear to text me and Bethany and let us know how it goes!” Mia demanded.

“I will. Promise! And thanks again. This means a lot to me. That you’d be willing to kick his ass when we’ve only known each other a short time.”

Mia grinned. “What are friends for?”

Josie rose, hugged both of the women fiercely and promised again to text them the minute she got things worked out with Ash. Then she walked out with them and waited while they got into the car and waved as they pulled away.

Slinging her purse over her shoulder, she started walking in the direction of her apartment. Her thoughts were a whirlwind, but excitement and relief replaced her earlier gloom.

Now she just had to hope that Ash would forgive her and that he really did love her.

The walk took longer than she’d thought and by the time she reached her apartment she was tired from not having slept the night before and she was impatient to get inside, take a shower and call Ash.

She cursed the fact that she’d left her cell phone in her living room. She could have already read her texts and listened to her voice mails. They would give her a good idea of Ash’s mood and whether it would be a simple matter of apologizing to him.

She put her key in the lock, frowning when she realized she must have forgotten to lock it on her way out. But then the last thing on her mind hadn’t been whether she locked up or not. She really needed to be more careful. Of course if she and Ash reconciled, she wouldn’t have to worry about that because he always made certain she was protected. For that matter he had still made sure she was protected, even though she’d left him. But then she hadn’t noticed her two shadows when she returned to her apartment. Had they given up? Had Ash given up?