Broken Dove (Fantasyland #4)(172)

He didn’t let me go but he straightened and looked over my head at the door as if he wanted to burn holes in them with his eyes.

Even though I didn’t want to, I thought it prudent to get it all out there, so I added, “They said a few things about your mother, your father and, um…his wife.”

He looked back at me and when he did, it was me who felt like I’d go up in flames at the heat of his glare.

Thus, I blurted, “I’d kind of like to talk about you being in love with me again.”

“Do you still wish to go to the other world?” he asked abruptly.

“We have more to talk about,” I answered.

“Do you still wish to go to the other world?” he pressed.

I stared into his eyes.

Eyes that looked annoyed.

But they were the eyes of the man who loved me.

Then I whispered, “No.”

“Do I have your love in return?” he asked.

Oh God.

God!

I swallowed.

Still staring into his eyes, I whispered, “Yes.”

He slid his fingers up into my hair and instantly stopped looking annoyed.

He looked something a whole lot better.

Something that made a beautiful man impossibly more beautiful.

God.

“You love me,” he whispered back.

I didn’t repeat my response.

I repeated something else.

“We have a lot to talk about, Apollo.”

“Yes, for instance, why you love me.”

I was back to staring but it turned to glaring when I saw his lips twitch.

I didn’t find anything funny. In fact, suddenly all that was happening overwhelmed me, all I’d held back feeling slammed into me, and I closed my eyes so I could focus on not letting it consume me.

He was in love with me.

Apollo Ulfr, general of a queen’s army, man of many enterprises, father to two great kids, was in love with me.

I opened my eyes again when I felt his forehead come to rest on mine.

And the instant it did, he stated, “You have my vow that I will not speak to you in that manner again, Maddie. No matter what is on my mind, what I’m feeling, how significant the things are that are troubling me. Like my son, I lashed out at someone I loved, hoping they’d take the pain I was inflicting so I could release some of the pain I was feeling. I should be old enough to know better. You know I regret it. What I must know is that you trust it won’t happen again.”

“I…you…I,” I stammered, pulled it together and finished, “Trust is built.”

He moved away half an inch and stated, “Yes. But in this case, it must be earned. This I’ll do.”

Okay.

Yes.

This man loved me.

And I loved this man.

He pissed me off. Shit was crazy and it was extreme.

But I still loved him.

I didn’t know if this was awesome or scary as shit.

Apollo’s next words didn’t help.

“Our last conversation prior to you doing something foolish and me retaliating by being cruel,” he paused and stated severely, “something neither of us will repeat,” he paused again and waited until I agreed to this demand by nodding before he continued, “was the beginning of a discussion about you moving to Karsvall. Alas, with things as they are with my son, you cannot do this. He is still struggling. This would not be wise.”

I nodded because he was right.

It wouldn’t be wise.

“However I would like you to come to dinner,” he carried on. “For myself. For Élan. She misses your presence at our meals, as do I. We’ll dine together, watch and assess Chris’s reaction. After, we’ll discuss how we move on from there.”

I missed him too.

And Élan.

And Chris.

But I didn’t think dinner was a good idea.

So I told him, “Uh…Chris heard what the maids said as well. It was clear it freaked him. And when I, um…had words with him, they were kind of…” I paused to draw in a deep breath and finished, “Final.”

I watched Apollo’s jaw clench again before he released it and replied, “Then you will not come to dinner. You’ll return to the dower house. I’ll speak with my son about what he heard. Going forward, I wish Christophe to have my attention and presence and I hope you understand he must have both without you for a time. That said, it would be imprudent to continue your complete absence for he must get used to you. But from this time forward, for his sake, we will take it much more slowly.”

At that, I nodded.

“Tonight, I’ll come to you after he’s asleep,” Apollo declared.

He’d come to me when Christophe was asleep.

I swallowed.

Then I nodded yet again.

“When I do, you and I will discuss all the things you wish to talk about,” he concluded.

I found my voice and used it to say, “Okay.”

He held my gaze and repeated my, “Okay,” but his was way better.

It was way better because his eyes were warm, his voice was soft, and he was using his hands to pull me closer.

When he was a breath away, his gaze boring into mine, he whispered, “You love me.”

I did.

I didn’t say that.