Blackbird (A Stepbrother Romance #1)(37)

I buried my face in his shoulder and cried.

“You should stay with me tonight. I have my own room.”

I swallowed, hard. “Is that a good idea?”

“I’m not going to pressure you to sleep with me.”

“That’s… that’s not what I meant, I didn’t mean it like that, I…”

“I didn’t mean it like that, either. Stay with me, Eve.”

“Okay.”

“Let’s get something to eat.”

We drove out to a pizza place on the highway and ate there, split a medium with sausage and pepperoni between us. I don’t know how Victor stayed in such amazing shape, eating the way he did. I felt calmer after I had some food, but I was still rattled and felt like someone was watching me as I tucked some clothes into my smallest bag and told Jennifer she had the room to herself that night. Victor parked the car while I was inside and met me out front, and walked with me across campus to the upperclassmen’s dormitories. His room was bigger than the one I shared with Jennifer. There was an extra bed. He had it taken apart and stacked up in the closet. After I came in, he started pulling out, meaning to put it together for me.

“You don’t have to do that,” I said. My voice was calm, but my body was in turmoil. My stomach was doing backflips, my heart was pounding.

I curled upon his bed without asking and took out a geography textbook. I had to study for class the next day.

The words danced on the page. I suddenly didn’t care much for arid and semi-arid lands.

Victor sat down next to me and I closed the book. Gently, he took it from my hands and set it on the other end of the bed. He put his arm around me and I leaned on him, sighing deeply.

“Say what you want, when you’re ready.”

I didn’t know what to say for a long time.

When I finally blurted something out, it was just there.

“I wish I had a mom like yours.”

Victor was quiet. I laid down with him, curled up against his side. He didn’t press me or say anything. He just let me lay on his arm and rested his hand on my hip.

“I want my mom,” I choked out, my voice tight with anguish.

“It still hurts,” he said, finally. “I miss my father every day of my life. I’d give up the house and the car and everything else to have him back.”

“I thought everyone was like me,” I said. “I thought everyone’s father was like mine. Jennifer told me about her father. He died not long ago.”

Victor nodded.

“He never hit her. He took her and her sister to the beach. He bought them candy and ice cream and he never hit her with a belt or burned her. She could watch TV and read whatever she wanted and she went to school.”

It just poured out of me.

“I don’t know how to be a person. All I know is math and history I had to memorize. I don’t know what to do or what to say about anything. I don’t…”

I trailed off, and wept softly.

Victor rolled onto his side to face me and took me in both arms.I wept softly in to his chest for what felt like hours.

“This is a co-ed building. You can get cleaned up in the girl’s bathroom if you want.”

I nodded, but I didn’t want to go anywhere. Victor gave me a washcloth and I cleaned up my face. My eyes were red and puffy and raw and my lip split when my father hit me.

“If he ever hits you again, I swear I will kill him.”

I tensed. “You can’t. Victor, you can’t.”

“Just because he’s your father-“

“They’d take you away,” I said. “I can’t lose you, too.”

“Eve,” he murmured, embracing me from behind.

I leaned back into him.

“You always know how to make me feel better. Make me feel better.”

I felt him tense up now.

“Eve, what do you mean?”

I turned around, feeling his arms slip around me. I chewed my bottom lip and unbuttoned the top of my shirt. Victor’s eyes went wide but he said nothing. He leaned back and I straddled him, sitting up a little, leaning on his chest with one hand while I undid the buttons with the other. I was not terribly proud of my body and my hand shook so much by the time I was halfway down that I couldn’t work the buttons. I took Victor’s hand instead and guided him.

“Please,” I said.

I sat up as he spread the top over my shoulders and tugged the sleeves free of my arms. I wasn’t dressed for seduction, and there was nothing sexy about the plain white t-shirt bra I was wearing, but his rough warm hands were shockingly gentle as he pulled the straps down my shoulders and reached behind me, sitting up a little, to unclasp it. My heart pounded as he pulled it away and drank me in with his eyes. His hands cupped my breasts, and he circled his thumbs lightly around my nipples. It was a hard shock, and made my legs jerk as I sucked in a breath. He sat up and pulled me to him, and kissed me and kept kissing me for what felt like hours, his hands pressed to my back. Finally he rolled onto his side, lowering me to the bed, and tugged my jeans down, took off my shoes and socks.

The more of my skin was exposed, the faster my heart began to beat. I could barely speak by the time he was slowly drawing my panties down my thighs.

“Oh wow,” he said.

The hair between my legs was darker than on my head, but not much.