Black Heart (Cursed Hearts #1)(92)

“I’m not going back to the room until you and I have a talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” he said absently as he shifted to move her off his lap and do whatever it took to finish this when Shayne said, “We’ll be back in a few, lad. We need to discuss strategy and all that.”

Before he could argue they disappeared, prolonging something that was becoming harder and harder to do with every passing second. Why did she have to make this so damn difficult? He was doing this for her and their baby.

Right now it was hard to accept, but one day, hopefully, soon she would understand the gift that he was giving her. He’d do anything to see her belly swell with their child, to hold him and to be by her side as they watched their son grow up, but that wasn’t in the cards for them. This curse explained so much and made him wish that he’d listened to his fears and stayed away from her. Then again if he had, their child wouldn’t be getting this chance to escape.

He knew what it was like to be alone and defenseless. Just thinking about their child suffering like that was enough to make him sick to his stomach. No child should suffer and he was going to make damn sure that his child’s suffering ended now.

Letting them end his life was taking a huge risk, but right now that’s all he had. His only hope was that he wouldn’t have to wait very long before he had access to all the memories from his prior lives. That was one of the main reasons that he was doing this. They needed that information.

He knew that Marty was pissed with his plan and wanted to figure this out together, but if they had any real chance, this was it. It would hurt like hell to walk away from her, but he had no choice. As soon as he had all of his memories back, he was going to go through each one and try to find something that would help save his wife and child. It was the only way.

“You’re not doing this, Tristan.”

“It’s the only way,” he said tightly, refusing to look at her or touch her, knowing that it wouldn’t take much for him to lose his nerve.

“No, it’s not,” Marty stubbornly said and he knew that there was nothing that he could say to convince her otherwise, so he didn’t bother.

“I’ve made my decision.”

“And I’ve made mine,” she said as she cupped his face in her soft warm hands and moved to pull his gaze to hers, but he wouldn’t allow it. Not when he was so goddamn close to breaking.

“This is the only way to save you and the baby, Marty. It’s not a choice that I’m making lightly, but it is my choice,” he said evenly as he reached up with his good hand and gently removed her hands from his jaw, careful not to look at her.

“Uh huh, I tell you what, Tristan. Look me in the eye and tell me that this plan is our only hope and I’ll let you go, no questions asked.”

Without looking at her, he said, “When they remove me, I’ll get my memories back and hopefully some answers so that I can save you and the baby.”

“How very noble of you, Tristan,” she murmured. “Now why don’t you try looking at me when you say that?”

She knew him too damn well, he thought with a sigh as he closed his eyes and let his head drop back. “Marty,-“

“We need you, Tristan,” she said softly.

“I’m doing this for you,” he said, hating how his voice broke and wishing that Shayne and the rest of the cowards would get back in here and finish this. Honestly, he didn’t think that he could take much more.

“How can you be sure that this is the right thing for us?” she asked, cupping his face in her hands. Before he could push her hands away she was leaning over him and brushing her lips against his.

“For all you know, Tristan, taking yourself out of the game will trigger the curse and me and the baby will suffer,” she said, hitting on something that he’d forced himself not to think about, but now that she’d said it, that’s all he could think about.

What if leaving triggered something seriously f**ked up happening to her and their baby?

“Fuck,” he groaned.

He could feel her smiling against his lips. She was a smug little thing, he noted as he thought over what she’d said, trying to find an argument that would support his plan and admittedly not trying very hard. He didn’t want to leave her, but he also didn’t want her or the baby to suffer because of him.

“What’s your plan?” he asked, sighing heavily as he opened his eyes and raised his head, already knowing that she had one.

“I thought that you’d never ask,” she said, smiling as she readjusted herself on his lap, careful of his shoulder. “We interrogate your brothers,” Marty said, smiling as she easily said the word and making him want to roll his eyes, “and find out absolutely everything we can about the curse and the events that led up to the curse getting activated. That way we know what to watch out for and we can make plans.”

He reached up with his good hand and pushed a loose strand of her hair back as he gently cupped her face. “What if this plan doesn’t work?”

“Then we’ll learn from our mistakes and the next time-“

“I don’t want to put you or the baby through this again,” he said quietly.

She turned her face and pressed a kiss against his palm. “I would rather free the baby than to take the chance of sending him back to wherever he’s been, Tristan. If that means that we keep coming back until we get this thing right, then that’s what we’ll have to do.”