Bitter Spirits (Roaring Twenties #1)(74)

She inhaled sharply on an unexpected sob. “What else can I do? It is the only work I know.” Sniffling, she wrestled with her emotions, and lost. Her fears jumped off her loosened tongue before she could censor them. “I will not stay here and play mistress to you until you grow tired of me and find someone blonder or prettier or more glamorous.”

“Why the hell is our imaginary breakup my fault?”

Because she couldn’t fathom herself finding anyone else she could want more than him. But she didn’t say that. “I’ve built a reputation—club owners are seeking me out, not the other way around. I don’t have to beg for work or try to prove myself. If I don’t take advantage of it, my time may pass. Can’t you understand that? This is all I have. I’m not fit for anything else but this life.”

He surged up from the stool, biting back a reply as flames danced behind mismatched eyes. The surface of the water shook under his angry footfalls as he left the bathroom.

• • •

Winter fought the urge to throw something against the wall. Goddamn New Orleans. If he never heard the city’s name on her tongue again, it would be fine with him.

Find someone blonder . . .

What the hell was wrong with her? Had the fire melted her brain? Why the devil would he want someone—

His gaze fell on the silver picture frame lying facedown. Paulina. He picked it up and looked at her photograph. Aida was jealous of a dead woman? Did she think he kept this here out of grief or love? Far from it. He kept it out of respect. Maybe it would be more accurate to say that he kept it to feed his guilt. Because if he didn’t see it every now and again, he found himself forgetting what she looked like.

Even worse, he found himself not thinking about her at all, which wasn’t much different than when she was alive. Sometimes he wouldn’t see her for days at a time when they were married, even living in the same house. And that had never bothered him.

He should’ve let her go when she wanted the divorce.

Was he now so quick to repeat the same mistake with Aida? Her association with him made her a target. His fault.

Again.

He thought of the numbing panic that unfurled inside him when he’d gotten the call from Bo: Someone tried to burn down Aida’s apartment with her inside it. Death by fire. Few things were worse.

But she didn’t die. She was safe, here with him. That was all that mattered for the moment.

Exhaling heavily, Winter picked up Paulina’s photograph and headed to his study. He sat in front of the windows, looking out over the city as dawn broke. After a few minutes, Astrid peeked inside the door, her arms filled with clothes.

“I heard all the commotion,” she said. Her slippers slapped against the floor as she walked, nightgown billowing behind her. “Bo told me what happened. I thought Aida might need some clothes.”

“Tack, mitt hjärta.”

“You’re welcome.” She laid the clothes on the windowsill. “Bo said it was faulty wiring that caused the fire, and that she lost everything.”

“Mmm.”

“But I have a feeling it had something to do with the bootlegging.” When he didn’t answer, she perched on his lap. “I can tell you’re upset. I’m sorry.”

He ran his fingers along one strand of her lemony blond hair. “Someone is trying to scare me into giving up the business. I don’t want you to be frightened. I’ll take care of things.”

“I know you will.”

“But until I put a stop to it, I’d like you to be mindful when you’re out. Not frightened, but mindful.”

“I always am.”

“Use good sense and have someone with you at all times, but if we allow ourselves to be intimidated, then—”

“They win. Got it. I’ll be sensible.”

“Good girl. How do you feel about another shopping trip?”

“For Aida?”

“I’ll call the department store and coax them into letting you in before they open to the public. Bo can ride with you. And Jonte.” And a couple of extra guards to man the doors, and take a circuitous route in one of the old cars. Better safe than sorry.

“Count on me. I can be ready in an hour.” She gave him a sleepy smile and clasped his hand. “Will Aida be moving in here permanently?”

“She leaves for New Orleans in a week.”

“For good?”

He shrugged.

The tips of her slim fingers folded over his. “Are you in love with her?”

His stomach tightened. Was he? He remembered how miserable he’d felt those few days when they’d been apart after the fight about Sook-Yin. And he knew how relieved he felt now, knowing she was only a few yards away, safe inside his home. He wanted her to sleep in his bed . . . wanted to see her when he woke up.

He wanted all of her, not just an affair.

And he definitely didn’t want her to leave. The thought of it filled him with a black despair that rivaled the pain of losing his family.

“I might be,” he finally answered honestly.

“I think she might be in love with you, just from the way she was looking at you that day when she tried to give the coat back. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone look at you that way. Definitely not—”

“Don’t say her name.”