Before We Kiss (Fool's Gold #14)(41)

“Darling, I know a much better brand of condom,” his mother called. “And where is that pink vibrator I sent you last Christmas? The one that’s shaped to reach a woman’s G-spot. I don’t see it anywhere.”

“Mom, get out of my bedroom.”

She appeared in the doorway, her expression one of genuine confusion. “I was just exploring your life, darling. It’s how we reacquaint ourselves after being apart for so long.”

“Some people just have a conversation,” he mumbled.

“I’ve got the martinis ready,” Taryn called from the kitchen.

“Wonderful,” Lark said.

They went to the living room. Reggie carried in a tray of drinks while Taryn followed with some appetizers Sam had picked up from Angelo’s, the local Italian restaurant.

Taryn pointed to the drinks on the tray. “Straight up with a twist, straight up with olives, straight up with a hint of lavender for the beautiful woman I love so much.”

Lark smiled at her.

“Straight up seems to be a theme,” Jack whispered, taking one of the drinks.

“As long as it takes the edge off,” Sam told him, and grabbed one for himself.

He swallowed half of his in a gulp and glanced at Taryn. She grinned and pointed, as if saying yes, there was a pitcher waiting in the refrigerator. Something he would need to get through the visit.

Once everyone was settled, conversation seemed to flow more smoothly. Lark and Reggie talked about Sam’s sisters and how well they were doing. Most of the talk was relatively normal and there was only one mention of his sister Lottie’s vagina, which Sam considered a win where his parents were concerned.

“You’re on a book tour?” Kenny asked.

Lark nodded. “I never wanted to go on one before. Not when I had to be apart from Reggie for so long.” She smiled at her husband. “We try to never be apart for more than twenty-four hours and our goal is to make love at least once every forty-eight hours.”

“Mom,” Sam said sharply. “TMI.”

“You always say that. It’s not possible to have too much information. Knowledge is important.”

“Not when it’s about my parents’ sex life.”

“You should be happy,” Reggie said. “You have the Ridge sports equipment, as my dad used to say to me.”

Sam felt the familiar sense of hopelessness that always seemed to swallow him when his parents were around. It wasn’t that he didn’t love them; it was that he didn’t know how to survive them.

Taryn leaned close. “Maybe Kenny or Jack could flash her,” she murmured. “That would be a distraction.”

“Not a good one.”

She patted his hand and took his empty glass. A minute later, she was back and the glass was full.

“You’re a good woman,” he told her.

Lark leaned against Reggie. “Now that your father is retired, he can travel with me, so we’re going on tour together. We’re driving and that makes it fun. This country is so beautiful and we’ve been to the most interesting places. You wouldn’t believe all the places we’ve had sex outdoors.”

Reggie chuckled. “We’ve been caught a few times, but that adds to the fun.”

Sam felt the beginning of a headache.

Kenny leaned forward. “Like where?”

Jack laughed. “Any arrests?”

Reggie shook his head. “We had cops tell us to move it indoors once, but then the guy admitted he was pleased to know people of our age still did it. Plus, Lark is a beautiful woman. Anyone would want to see her naked.”

Sam glanced toward the door and thought longingly of Mexico.

Conversation continued for another half hour or so. Sam lost track of the number of martinis Taryn poured for him. Finally his friends said they had to leave. Kenny and Jack both said they’d be walking and coming back for their cars in the morning, which meant Taryn had to call Angel for a ride.

“Don’t forget, I want to talk to you about that new technique,” Lark told her.

“I can’t wait,” Taryn said.

Lark looked around the room. “Anyone else want in on the discussion?”

Jack and Kenny glanced at each other, as if not sure what to do. Taryn was already following Lark and Reggie. For Sam, it was a no-brainer. He headed for the front door and didn’t once look back.

* * *

“I LOVE IT,” Dellina said, feeling some of her stress fade away. Whatever else was happening, she could count on her sisters to be there for her. It was, she thought, one of the advantages of family. Knowing that she didn’t have to deal with any single crisis alone.

Ana Raquel preened as she tore off a small piece of bacon and fed it to Caramel. The tiny dog took it delicately, woofed down the piece, then spun as if to say not only was it delicious, she would very much like some more, please.

Fayrene made a couple more notes, then tasted the last mocktail. “I agree. These drinks are perfect,” she told her twin. “With all the different ingredients, the kids can make different flavors and figure out what they like.”

“Using different juices is genius,” Dellina told Ana Raquel.

“I’m glad you think so. I’m going to use what’s left over to flavor the sorbet for the next night so the children can tell their parents how they squeezed juice or used the juicer to extract liquid.”