Beat of the Heart (Runaway Train #2)(55)
I smirked down at her. “What I’m always thinking—how to get you flat on your back underneath me.” Leaning over, I brought my mouth to hers. I nibbled and sucked at her bottom lip. Her resolve began to momentarily waver. I shifted to pin her arms over her head. It put us in a position we hadn’t been in before—I was straddling her.
With my thighs on each side of her hips, my weight kept her firmly underneath me. Seizing the opportunity I snatched the keys from her hand. “Ha, gotcha.”
“Let me up, you ass.”
“Nope. Not until I hear you say ‘AJ, you are the master of the universe’.” I quirked my brows before looming over her—my face mere inches from hers. “On second thought, you need to say, ‘AJ, you are the master of my universe and my master orgasm donor.’”
Even though my tone was completely lighthearted, Mia’s expression transformed into one of panic. Instead of squirming playfully beneath me like before, she began to thrash back and forth. Her eyes took on a wild gleam, like that of a trapped animal. And then something within her snapped. “Get off. Get off. GET OFF!” she screamed, pounding her fists against my chest so hard that she knocked the air from my lungs.
Wheezing, I stared frozen in disbelief at her erratic behavior. I remained unblinking and unmoving until she sent a stinging slap so hard across my cheek that my jaw popped. Out of my stupor, I finally rolled off her. The instant she realized she was free she leapt to her feet and began sprinting away from me. “Fuck,” I groaned as I hauled up out of the grass to take after her. “Mia!”
She bypassed the four-wheeler, and instead, continued barreling down the overgrown path. “Mia, wait!” When I finally caught up with her, I reached out and grabbed her arm, causing us both to skid to a stop. I realized a second too late that it was the wrong f*cking thing to do when she lunged at me, clawing and slapping my face, shoulders, and chest.
Defensively blocking her hits, I then grabbed her shoulders. “Mia, it’s me, AJ.” Her frenzied gaze darted around the clearing. “Look at me,” I commanded. “You’re safe here with me. Nothing or no one is going to hurt you. I swear.”
When her eyes finally locked on mine, the sheer panic in them caused my chest to ache. But slowly that look receded. It was the pain, coupled with embarrassment, shining bright in her eyes that followed that made my stomach muscles clench like I’d taken a physical kick to the gut, rather than an emotional one.
A shaky hand went to cover her mouth as tears streaked down her cheeks. Her head shook so wildly back and forth I feared she might get whiplash. “Oh God…Oh AJ, I…”
“Look, it’s—“
“I’m s-sorry. I’m s-so, so sorry,” she replied, her voice choking off with her sobs.
“Baby, you have nothing to apologize about.” Tentatively, I reached out to cup her cheek. When she flinched, I dropped my hand. Feeling a f*cking mess of confusion and helplessness, I kicked at a few stray pebbles and waited for her to give me some sign as to what the hell I should do.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” she kept mumbling absently.
“Mia, please don’t say that.”
“It’s just you had me pinned down like he…” A chill ran through her body, causing her to shudder so hard that her teeth chattered.
Closing the distance between us, I ached to wrap her trembling body in my arms. “Amorcito mio, please talk to me. Tell me what I can do to help you,” I begged.
Her only response was to swipe the back of her hand across her running nose while making these pitiful hiccupping sighs. I started tapping my hands nervously against my short pockets when she became still as a statue. It seemed like she stared dead ahead of us for a small eternity before she finally whispered, “I never wanted you to have to see this side of me.”
This time when I reached out for her, she didn’t cower away from me. Trying to take it slow, I swept a strand of hair out of her face and smiled. “Mia, there isn’t a single side of you I don’t want to see. I want to know every inch of you—inside and out.”
Her lip trembled like she was about to burst out crying. “Trust me, you don’t want to know this.” Her expression then turned sour, like she had a bad taste in her mouth. Her emotions were ricocheting so fast I could barely keep up. “Dammit, we were just supposed to have that night together—then you wouldn’t have had to see me like this. It wasn’t supposed to turn into me being inadequate for yet another guy!”
My sympathy quickly turned over to frustration, and I threw my hands up in exasperation. “Would you stop lumping me with all these *s you’ve had the misfortune of knowing? That’s not me, Mia. Do you see me bailing or shrinking away like some *? Fuck no! I’m right here, right now, wanting to know what the hell just happened so I can help you—to comfort you emotionally and physically.”
She cut her eyes over at me, pinning me with a hard stare. “Yeah, I see right through your little ‘knight in shining armor’ routine. You think I’m broken, and by giving me a few moments of your precious time, you might be able to fix me. But trust me, you can’t do shit, AJ! I’m not broken—I’m f*cking shattered into a thousand jagged pieces. Pieces that will slice a perfect, pretty boy like you in two.”