Bad for You (Sea Breeze #7)(66)
“Eight?” It took ten hours driving time to get here.
“Eight,” he repeated.
“But it’s a ten-hour drive.”
He ran the hand he was holding along his cheek. “Not when a man is going after his woman, it’s not.”
My heart squeezed. His sweet words always managed to get to me. Hearing them and knowing he really meant them would be hard to walk away from. I’d had two weeks to think. Two weeks to realize that so many things I’d thought were true weren’t. But I’d also had two weeks to face the fact that I wouldn’t be a hindrance to a child having their parent.
“I’m sorry I left without telling you. But I didn’t expect to be gone so long. Then things happened, and I decided to stay. Me being here gave you time to adjust and for you and Britt to make plans.”
He scowled. “I’m not making plans with Britt. I’ll take care of the kid if it’s mine. Hell, she’s yet to prove to me she’s actually pregnant. But the only plans I need to make are with you. I’m empty without you, love. Completely f**king empty.”
God, how did I tell this man no and walk away from him? He was so determined, and I loved him so much. Not taking what I wanted when it was right there in front of me was almost impossible. “I grew up thinking I had no one. No one wanted me or loved me because I thought I had no family. I accepted the fact that I was a burden on the Williamses. They gave me a roof over my head, and I should be thankful for that. They didn’t have to love me. I took verbal abuse from a hateful woman and believed every word she said. I thought I was evil and ugly. I thought I was unlovable because that’s all I’d been told. But the entire time I had been living with my father. The man who helped give me life. He let this happen to me. He didn’t show me love. He didn’t love me. I’m marked because of that, Krit. It will be something I carry with me my entire life. I won’t be the reason another child doesn’t have the love of a parent.” Tears were burning my eyes, and I pulled my hand out of his and held it tightly with my other hand.
“Blythe,” he said quietly. “Your father is a sad son of a bitch. He had you, and he didn’t love you like you deserve to be loved. I can’t comprehend how anyone couldn’t love you. Fuck, I can’t comprehend how anyone couldn’t want to cherish you and protect you. And I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive the man. So you’ve been warned. If you want to form a relationship with him, fine, but I don’t want to be near him. I’ll wait in the other room or outside in the car when you visit him,” He reached over and tilted my head up so I had to look at him. One lonely tear rolled down my face, and he caught it with his thumb. “I will love my kid. I can love my kid and be a dad and not love its mom. People do it all the time. It’s not a package deal. If the baby is mine, I will love it. I swear to you. I wouldn’t do to that baby what was done to you. But I will be a shell of a f**king man if I have to live the rest of my life without you. So, if you’re worried about me being a good dad, then know I need you in order to be whole.”
Another tear escaped, and then another. My vision got blurry as the tears filled my eyes and began streaming down my face. “I love you,” I choked out, unable to say anything else.
He jerked the car door open and jumped out, then took off running around the front of my car. He opened my car door, swinging it wide, then pulled me out of the car and into his arms as his body trembled.
I clung to him as he buried his face in my neck and held me. He didn’t say anything, but the slight trembling of his body was so out of place with him. “Say it again,” he said against my neck after several minutes.
I reached up and ran my hand over his hair. “I love you. I’ve loved you for a while now.”
“Fuck,” he groaned, and pulled back to look at me. “I really wish you’d told me when you realized it.”
“I thought it would scare you off,” I admitted.
He shook his head, soaking me up as he began caressing my arms and back. “You just might be the only person on Earth who doesn’t know how f**king insane I am about you. People who don’t know us can take one look at me and know I’m completely owned. It’s all over my face when I look at you.”
“I’ve missed you,” I told him.
He cupped my face the way he had before he kissed me the first time. “Good, because I’ve been lost without you,” he said, then his lips touched mine and opened on a sigh. The sigh was mine.
His mouth slanted over mine as he deepened the kiss. I felt light-headed as I held onto his arms and molded myself against him. I wasn’t sure if I would ever have this again. Now that I did, I knew I couldn’t let it go.
“Where are you staying?” he asked against my mouth. “I need to be inside you. Soon. Now.”
“The house I grew up in,” I said, not wanting to go there. It was filled with bad memories, ones I didn’t want to feel now. Not anymore.
“Go get in the passenger seat. We’re going to get a hotel room,” he said with one last kiss and a pat to my bottom.
I hurried around the car to get in, when I noticed a girl my age standing by her car watching me. I’d gone to school with her, and she’d been a member of the church. But she’d never once been nice to me. She had been one of the many to make jokes about me and make me feel even more unwanted than I already had felt. She had been watching me kiss Krit. She’d seen the way he held me, and a smile touched my lips. I guess I just gave her something to talk about. I lifted my hand and waved at her before climbing inside the car.