Back on Blossom Street (Blossom Street #4)(92)

“I really stuck out, didn’t I?” she said. She recalled how badly she’d wanted to win the Bible that was a prize for the kid who could recite the most verses from memory. She’d been willing to memorize a hundred of them. She’d won it, too, although she’d lost that Bible somewhere along the way. Her Bible and just about everything it stood for.

“Well, you weren’t typical of the children in Sunday School,” Susan confirmed.

“I still stick out, don’t I?” Alix asked, getting to the essence of the conversation. “That’s what you want to say, right?” Alix tried to make this as straightforward as possible. “Speaking plainly, you don’t think I’ll be a good wife for Jordan.”

“No, no, that’s not it at all,” Susan rushed to explain. “It’s just the church where you don’t fit in.” She sighed. “That sounds so unkind and I don’t mean it to, Alix, I really don’t. I’m thinking of Jordan a few years down the road when he’s a senior pastor.”

“In other words, you’re afraid I’ll be hindrance to him.”

“Being a pastor’s wife takes a special kind of woman.”

Alix took a moment to consider that. “You’re saying I need to be more like you.”

Susan shook her head. “It isn’t easy working in a church, that’s what I’m trying to say. People have no idea they’re being so critical. The congregation will judge Jordan when they look at you.”

“I see.” Alix hadn’t thought of it in those terms.

Susan glanced over her shoulder at her husband and son. “Larry doesn’t know we’re having this conversation,” she said in a low voice.

“Does Jordan?” If he did, Alix swore she’d get up and walk out right this minute.

“Heavens, no!” Susan said. “I wanted this to be woman to woman.”

Jordan’s mother didn’t need to say it; Alix already knew. She knew because she’d heard that one-sided conversation at the Donovans’. “Last month, a few days before I called off the big wedding,” Alix said, staring down at her lemonade, “I was over at Jacqueline’s. The two of you were talking on the phone and Jacqueline didn’t realize I was in the house. I wasn’t intentionally eavesdropping and should’ve left, but I heard my name mentioned. I got the gist of the conversation in about two seconds. You’d rather I didn’t marry Jordan.”

A flush of embarrassment rose to the other woman’s cheeks. “No, that’s not it at all! Oh, dear, I’m making a mess of this.”

“Then explain it to me,” Alix said, struggling not to sound defensive or angry.

“It’s just that…” Susan paused. “I’ll admit I’ve had some concerns and,” she added quickly, “it’s occurred to me that my son’s ready to marry a woman with connections to a hit man.”

“I know a few whores, too,” Alix said as if this were all a joke. “Actually, they were pretty decent people. I’ll bet that surprises you.”

Susan blinked a couple of times.

“Did Jordan ever tell you about when I was living on the street? Or how often I ran away from foster homes?”

“Alix, I’m sorry,” Susan whispered.

“Don’t be. You’re probably right. You expected your son to marry a pretty blond church girl. You certainly didn’t expect him to choose someone with a mother in prison and a father who walked out and never looked back. I’ve committed my share of sins, done drugs, lived on the edge. I’m a long way from that skinny little girl working so hard to earn a Bible in Sunday School.”

Jordan’s mother paled.

“That isn’t the worst of it,” Alix told her coldly.

“Please, this isn’t necessary,” Susan pleaded. “Jordan loves you and—”

“Listen. What you need to understand is that I’m not the person I used to be,” Alix said, swallowing the lump in her throat. She refused to allow Susan to see her cry. “Jordan knows that, but I don’t think you do.”

“Perhaps not,” Susan admitted. “But what am I supposed to believe when I hear about people coming to you asking to have someone killed?”

“Not killed, injured,” Alix corrected—as if that really made a difference. “Margaret wanted the man who attacked her daughter to hurt the same way he’d hurt her.” She must have raised her voice because Jordan glanced at them.

“Did Dad tell you about that?” he asked his mother, hurrying over to where they sat.

Susan met Alix’s eyes and silently pleaded with her not to divulge the rest of their conversation. “Yes, he did say something about it,” she said tightly. “Alix and I were discussing…the incident.”

Stepping up behind Alix, Jordan rested his hands on her shoulders. “Did Alix tell you what she told Margaret?” His voice was impassive but Alix could feel the intensity of his emotion.

His mother shook her head. “We hadn’t gotten to that.”

“She talked to Margaret about forgiveness,” Jordan said. “What a marvelous response, don’t you think? I’m pretty sure Margaret listened, too.”

“I hope she did,” Alix murmured, but she couldn’t know for sure.