Awakened (House of Night #8)(53)

At first she didn't understand what it was she was seeing. Yeah, she could tell the crying person was a woman, and she was outside the House of Night gate. As Stevie Rae got closer she could see that the woman was kneeling in front of the gate, just off to the right side of it. She'd leaned what looked like a big funeral wreath made of plastic pink carnations and green stuff against the stone pillar. In front of that she'd lit a green candle and, as she continued to cry, she was pulling a picture out of her purse. It was when the woman brought the picture to her lips to kiss it that Stevie Rae's eyes found her face.

"Mama!"

She'd barely whispered the word, but her mom's head came up and her eyes instantly found Stevie Rae.

"Stevie Rae? Baby?"

At the sound of her mama's voice, the knot that had been building inside Stevie Rae's stomach suddenly dissolved, and she ran to the gate. With no other thought except getting to her mama, Stevie Rae scaled the stone wall easily, landing on the other side.

"Stevie Rae?" she repeated, this time in a questioning whisper. Finding it impossible to speak, Stevie Rae just nodded, making the tears that had started to pool in her eyes slosh over and spill down her face.

"Oh, baby, I'm so glad I got to see you one more time." Her mom dabbed at her face with the oldfashioned cloth handkerchief she was clutching in one hand, making an obvious effort to stop crying.

"Sweetheart, are you happy wherever you are?" Not pausing for an answer, she kept talking, staring at Stevie Rae's face as if she was trying to memorize it. "I miss you so much. I wanted to come before and leave this wreath for you, and the candle and this real cute eighth-grade picture, but I couldn't get here because of the storm. Then when the roads was opened I couldn't make myself, 'cause visitin' here and leavin' all this for you would make it final. You'd really be dead." She mouthed the word, not able to speak it.

"Oh, Mama! I've missed you so much, too!" Stevie Rae hurled herself into her arms, buried her face in her mama's poofy blue coat, and breathing in the scent of home, sobbed her heart out.

"There, there, sweetheart. It's gonna be fine. You'll see. Everything'll be okay." She soothed and patted Stevie Rae's back and hugged her fiercely. Finally, after what seemed like hours, Stevie Rae was able to look up at her mom. Virginia "Ginny" Johnson smiled through her tears and kissed her daughter, first on her forehead and then gently on her lips. Then she reached into the pocket of her coat and pulled out a second handkerchief, this one still neatly folded. "Good thing I brought more than one."

"Thanks, Mama. You always come prepared." Stevie Rae grinned and wiped her face and blew her nose. "You don't have any of your chocolate chip cookies with you, do ya?"

Her mama's brow furrowed. "Baby, how can you eat?"

"Well, with my mouth like I always have."

"Baby," she said, looking increasingly confused. "I do not care that you are communing through the spirit world." Mama Johnson said the last part with a woo-woo tone to her voice and an attempt at mystical hand gestures. "I'm just real glad that I get to see my girl again, but I am gonna admit it'll take a sec for me to get used to the idea of you bein' a ghost, and all, 'specially one that cries real tears and eats. It just don't make good sense."

"Mama, I'm not a ghost."

"Are you some kinda apparition? Again, baby, it don't matter to me. I'll still love you. I'll come here and visit you lots and lots if this is what you want to haunt. I'm just askin' so I can know."

"Mama, I'm not dead. Well, not anymore."

"Baby, have you had a paranormal experience?"

"Mama, you have no idea."

"And you ain't dead? At all?" Mama Johnson asked.

"No, and I really don't know why. It did seem that I died, but then I came back, and now I have this," Stevie Rae pointed to the red tattoo Markings of vines and leaves that framed her face. "Apparently, I'm the first ever Red Vampyre High Priestess."

Mama Johnson had stopped crying, but at Stevie Rae's explanation, tears filled her eyes and overflowed again. "Not dead...," she whispered between sobs. "Not dead..."

Stevie Rae stepped into her mama's arms again and squeezed her tight. "I'm so sorry I didn't come and tell you. I wanted to. I really, really did. It's just that, well, I wasn't myself when I first was un-dead. And then all Hades broke loose at the school. I couldn't get away, and I couldn't just call you. I mean, how do you call your mama and say, `Hi, don't hang up. It's really me and I'm not dead anymore.' I guess I just didn't know what to do. I'm so sorry," she repeated, closing her eyes and holding onto her mom with everything she had.

"No, no, it's fine. It's fine. All that matters is that you're here and you're okay." Her mama pried Stevie Rae off her so she could look her over while she wiped her eyes. "You are okay, aren't you, baby?" "I'm fine, Mama."

Mama Johnson reached out and cupped Stevie Rae's chin, forcing her daughter to meet her gaze. She shook her head and in her firm, familiar, mom voice said, "It's not nice to lie to your mama."

Stevie Rae didn't know what to say. She stared at her mom as the dam of secrets and lies and longing began to break apart inside her. Mama Johnson took her daughter's hands, one in each of hers, and looked into her eyes. "I'm here. I love you. Tell me, baby," she said softly.