Avoiding Responsibility (Avoiding #2)(48)

Lexi reached for her luggage. "Oh, there's something you can't tell me. Shocker!" she said sarcastically.

"Hey," Ramsey spoke sharply, reaching out, and gripping the luggage with his hand, "I've got this." Lexi looked into his bright green eyes and released her hold. "Just give me a minute," he told Jack before hauling her suitcase upstairs.

Lexi followed behind angrier than she had originally thought. She knew that she had reason to continue to be angry at Jack. What he had done to her was completely unacceptable on so many levels. She still hadn't told anyone exactly what had gone down that fateful night last August more out of shame than anything. Jack had hurt her, but just as bad she had let him. She had blindly believed in what he was telling her, and thought that together they would have a future. After seeing everything crumble before her eyes, she had been forced to keep a wall up against those feelings at all times. Even a minor crack in that wall coupled with her anger about the whole Ramsey situation had made her unnecessarily snap at him.

Taking a right into the guest bedroom, Ramsey set her suitcase down next to the dresser before turning to face her. "What was that about?" he asked her keeping his voice level.

Lexi shook her head back and forth debating whether or not it was even worth it to bring up. "Nothing."

"Look I know that you're not happy about all this, and that there are issues with Jack and Bekah and me. But you asked what I had to do as a groomsman. Well this is one of the things that I have to do as a groomsman," he said rolling his eyes. "It's not like I want to talk to him about whatever he needs, but Bekah needs to me to do this. She's my sister even if she can be a bitch."

"I know, Ramsey. Alright?" she asked throwing her hands up in defeat.

"I'm not trying to make you feel bad," he said reaching forward and pulling her into his arms. "I just have to deal with him. You snapping won't help the situation. You'll still have to deal with him either way too."

Lexi sighed knowing he was right, but hating admitting it. She had wanted to remain indifferent to him. He just made her snap. After six years of being on edge around him constantly, it was difficult to not care. "You're right."

He planted a kiss on her forehead before releasing her. "Get comfortable. You know where everything is. Hopefully this won't take long."

As soon as Ramsey closed the door, Lexi kicked her luggage with such force she had to hop around on one foot due to the pain. She crumpled to the ground to examine the damage which had only furthered her anger and frustration. Her toes were red, but she hadn't broken the skin. They just felt cramped as she tried to wiggle them. After lying on the floor for another minute, she stood back up and began to pace the room.

How much longer could he really take? She desperately wanted to know what they were talking about and why it was taking longer than just a minute or two. She assumed it had something to do with the preparations for this weekend, but then why would he need to speak with Ramsey alone?

She knew he probably wasn't that comfortable with her being there. She wouldn't have been comfortable in the same situation. But that didn't mean he could just dismiss her the entire time that she was here. He hadn't even remembered inviting her here and by the look on his face she was the last person he wanted to see. Not that she cared.

Or so she kept telling herself. She was going to be at his damn wedding and suffer through the lies that they were going to tell each other. She was going to laugh during their vows and smile devilishly when he puts a real ring next to the fake one she was already wearing like a trophy. These were the things that she wanted to do, but they weren't the thing she wanted to do the most.

She wanted to ruin Bekah. She wanted to object in front of everyone that these two individuals were fit for marriage. When asked on what grounds, she was capable of giving so many different answers: infidelity, lust, greed, manipulation, lies…the list was endless. And these were all attributes that the mass crowd that would be present would be unaware of. It would be a triumphant beautiful moment for Lexi.

Chyna hadn't thought so. Even without knowing all the details, Chyna had disagreed with the idea. Her logic was probably right at least. She might be destroying Bekah and Jack, but to what end? Did it make her any better than Bekah to destroy something and in front of everyone? Lexi had tried to block out those questions. She had never stooped to Bekah's level once. Not once.

And there had been plenty of opportunities for sabotage. She could have ruined everything long ago and yet she hadn't done it. Chyna continued to refer back to those occurrences. If she hadn't been capable of doing it then, what made Lexi think she could do it right before the wedding? The only answer she had ever been able to come up with is that it was her last chance. After that, they would be wed. She would no longer have a chance.

Still, she kept asking herself what she was going to have a chance for. She wasn't going to magically win Jack back after all of this. And she didn't even want that anymore. Despite what had happened with Ramsey, a future was still a potential with him. There was no potential left with Jack. Just a long lost love of someone who could never fully reciprocate those affections. A part of her would always love him, but he couldn't be hers ever again. Not after what had happened…after what they had gone through. It had been too much. The last thing she ever wanted to do for him was show up at his wedding to see him become another woman's husband.