Avoiding Responsibility (Avoiding #2)(28)

Lexi scrunched her feet up underneath her and wrapped her arms around her knees effectively cutting him off from her. She closed her eyes and tried not to think about Jack. Her breathing hitched and she bit down on her lip hard enough to keep her mind occupied with the pain. "Uh…I just had to get away," she finally muttered.

He scooted closer to her on the bed and wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulders. "Hey, I'm not trying to pry. I'm just curious."

"Well, can we not talk about this?" she asked looking up at him with a fearful expression across her face. She had no idea what would happen if she started talking about Jack at that moment. She might end up blurting out what had actually happened and with everything in such a delicate position in her life – both Ramsey and her emotional state of being – she wasn't sure she could handle it. He might turn and run in the opposite direction if he knew. That would be the logical thing to do.

"Yeah, sure, if that's what you want," he agreed. "I just don't want to see you hurt like that ever again."

"Maybe another time," she told him relaxing some into his body. She was so afraid to talk to Ramsey about relationships in the event that he would in turn ask her similar questions. But she was so curious about his past. Even though she knew it wasn't smart, and she had just refused to talk to him about what had happened she couldn't keep herself from asking, "Have you ever been in love?"

Ramsey stiffened at the question his entire body going rigid. Lexi glanced up into his eyes which had hardened. His jaw was set tight; his breathing controlled and even, as if he was thinking about each inhalation. Lexi had no idea that simple question would have elicited such a reaction, but she immediately regretted the decision to ask.

"Uh, sorry," Lexi said trying to do damage control. "I guess it's a sore subject. Don't be mad."

He breathed out heavily and turned to face her. His features had returned to their normal softness. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to flip out. You just caught me off guard."

"Oh. Sorry. Really, I didn't mean to pry."

"No need to apologize," he said waving off her apology. "I should have just answered. I've never been in love."

Lexi's eyes widened in surprise. That certainly had not been what she had expected. "What? Really? Haven't you ever had a girlfriend?"

"Not in the real sense of the word."

"Never?" she asked in disbelief.

"I've…dated," he said that word carefully, "a lot. I've just never had anyone hold my interest."

Lexi's mouth had fallen open at some point, and she had to force herself to close it. How could someone have gone through their entire life without a girlfriend…without ever being in love? She wasn't exactly good with relationships, well she was terrible, but she had been in love. Tragically in love, but still there was always that cliché statement – to love and lost is better than to never have loved at all.

She was reminded of Bekah's comment to her about Ramsey being a player. She didn't know how to take that now that she knew what kind of person Bekah really was. On the other hand, hadn't he just confirmed his player status?

And if nothing ever held his attention, why was he still after her? Was it because she denied him what he wanted? She didn't want to be something that he was only after for the chase. She didn't want him to get what he wanted then dismiss her out of boredom. If he could do that to other girls, he certainly could do that to her.

"Wow," she managed to get out. "That's…depressing."

Ramsey laughed aloud. "It's been kind of lonely if that's what you mean," he said pulling her into him.

"But you're so attractive."

He laughed again heartier this time. "Thank you. I feel as if that is a contributing factor in why I have never found someone to hold my interest. I've heard," he told her sliding his hand into her hair and beginning to massage her head and down to her neck, "that most women are interested in my appearance. This makes it rather difficult to find anyone who wants more than that, or if they do, they want my money."

"Uh huh," Lexi said closing her eyes as his worked his way down to her shoulder blades.

"You never seemed interested in either."

"I'm interested in your looks," she murmured cracking a smile.

"Oh really?" he asked kneading the knots out of her back.

"God, that feels good," Lexi huskily said pushing her body back against his. She was trying to suppress her physical desire for him, but the way his hands were moving just made that more and more difficult.

Ramsey groaned at the feel of her. "Yes, yes it does."

"Oh," Lexi said realizing that she had effectively pressed herself flush against him and that a simple massage was beginning to turn into much more if she didn't stop herself.

Ramsey turned her body around and stared into her big brown eyes. His eyes drifted lower landing on her lips. He smiled as she did the same thing. Coming forward his lips pressed firmly against hers. His tongue darted out opening her mouth and massaging her tongue with his. She groaned deep in her throat. Her hands came up and pushed up into his blonde hair egging him on. His arms wrapped around her waist pulling her closer.

Just as Lexi was about to scramble to strip his clothes off, he pulled back from her. "As much as I want to continue," he said his eyes smoldering with desire. "I know we should take this slow."