At Peace (The 'Burg #2)(9)

Then I forced myself not to watch because firstly, I didn’t want to see and secondly, I was not an un-awesome, uptight Mom who would watch her daughter and her new boyfriend out the window.

But as I was turning away, my head whipped back and my eyes narrowed on the drive.

Except for under my car, Kate’s car and Dane’s pickup, the drive had been shoveled clean of snow.

I stopped looking out the front window to look left, out the window at the side over my kitchen sink facing Joe’s house.

The house was dark and there was no shiny, black, new model Ford pickup in the drive.

There wasn’t one the next morning either.

Or the next.

Or the two weeks after that.

Chapter Two

Hunger

I drove home from the garden shop thinking a variety of things.

First, I was thinking that full-time paychecks didn’t mean much of a change to part-time ones, especially when taxes and insurance were deducted.

Second, I was thinking that I spent an awful lot of time while Kate and Keira were growing up wishing I could do things. Things like go to a movie whenever I wanted. Things like take a long, hot bubble bath when the spirit moved me. Things like reading a book without the word “Mom” shouted over and over again (as in, “Mom, where’s my backpack?” and “Mom, Keira’s bothering me,” and “Mom, I’m hungry”). Now, with Kate out with Dane all the time (or in with him at our house, which I preferred seeing as I could keep an eye on them, however I still didn’t see much of Kate during these times) and Keira, who seemed to be attempting to make an art form out of socializing, they were never home. I could go see a movie, have a bubble bath and read a whole book if I wanted to. But, of course, since life mostly sucked and not a whole helluva lot worked out for me, I didn’t want any of that anymore. All I wanted was my girls to be home.

I could have probably handled this better if Tim was at home or I knew he was coming home instead of knowing I was going to an empty house, a one-woman dinner and nothing but aloneness until weeknight curfew hit (eight o’clock) or weekend curfew hit (ten o’clock for Keira, eleven for Kate). Unfortunately, this wasn’t an option.

I turned down the street and my mind left these thoughts as I saw the lights on and the black pickup in the drive at Joe’s house.

“Great,” I muttered under my breath.

It bothered me that he was home, why, I couldn’t imagine. He’d be gone tomorrow and I didn’t care about him anyway. I doubted he’d come over and ask me to have a drink with him at J&J’s or that I’d even see him at all. And there was no snow to shovel, making me think he might be a decent guy even though I knew he was not. And I knew he shoveled my snow, I knew this because I asked Colt if he’d done it and he’d said no and I’d asked Jeremy if he’d done it and he’d said no and since my other close neighbors were either too old (Myrtle, the widow who lived across from Joe and Pearl, the spinster who lived across from me) or bitches (Tina, who lived next to me on the other side), it had to be Joe.

But him being home, seeing his truck in his drive, for whatever reason bothered me, I couldn’t deny it.

I turned into my drive and parked under the awning. The days were staying lighter longer but night was edging in, it was getting late. Bobbie had asked me to do a bit of overtime and I did it. I needed the money for one, for another, why not? There was no reason to go home when Kate and Keira were both out.

I grabbed my purse, exited the Mustang and I stopped when I heard a woman’s laughter. I looked right to see Joe in his black leather jacket and jeans, sauntering to his truck. Behind him was a woman in a skintight, black mini-skirt and a jeans jacket. She had loads of long, wavy blonde hair and she was petite but wearing a pair of high-heeled, black boots. She was trotting after him on a half-run with such grace it was like she’d been born in high-heeled, black boots. She was still laughing and I stood in my open door, one arm on the hood of my Mustang, watching as she caught his hand and skidded on her heels, pulling his hand to her. He turned, she tipped her head back and she must have said something, something I didn’t hear, something she thought was funny for she laughed again.

But I could swear, even with the distance, I saw the white flash of Joe’s grin. I didn’t know him very well but, if asked, I would have said it wasn’t physically possible for Joe to grin.

Then he folded her in his arms, enveloping her with his large body and his head came down, hers tilted back and they started making out.

A sharp pain gripped my heart.

It hurt to watch. It hurt a lot and yet I couldn’t tear my eyes away.

There was something about his big body in his dark clothes, his powerful arms around her, holding her close to his long frame, enfolding her in a way that was about sex (or leading up to it, probably) but looked like more. Maybe safety, protection, his dark head bent to her blonde one, all of this, for some reason, cutting me clean to the bone.

I wanted that for me. I missed that, God, did I miss it and I wanted it back and it felt, in that moment, I’d never have it again.

And that f**king hurt.

I tore my eyes away and as silently as I could so Joe wouldn’t hear, I closed the door to my car and walked to the side kitchen door. I was about to insert my key when the door was thrown open from the inside, the light switched on, Keira and Kate stood in the frame and they shouted, “Surprise!” at the same time I felt a strong arm curl around my belly from behind. I was lifted clean off my feet and whirled in the air.