Asa (Marked Men #6)(82)

Dixie came back into the bar laughing and smiling. Church asked her if she had been talking to a guy, to which she just rolled her eyes and told him to mind his own business. I didn’t know what was going on between those two other than a whole lot of back-and-forth, but I figured they would either figure it out or they wouldn’t. Dixie was a mushy and soft sweetheart. Church came across like he was made of iron and concrete. It was an odd combination, but I had seen stranger things work and lead to happily-ever-after, so I just kept my mouth shut as we closed down the bar.

By the time I climbed into the Nova to drive the few blocks to my crappy apartment, I was drained. The reality of how fast my life was changing, the fact that it was all moving in the right direction but that I was doing it alone, sort of ripped me in half. I was proud of myself for making so many right steps, but still felt broken about the fact that none of those steps were taking me in the direction of the person I wanted.

I shoved my key in the door very aware that my time of coming home to this shit hole of an apartment was very nearly at an end. I chuckled when I realized I was going to have to hijack one of the girls and take her with me to buy an entire house worth of furniture. I didn’t own enough to even fill up one of the rooms in the place that was now mine.

It took me a second to recognize that I wasn’t alone once the front door was closed. All the lights were off like I had left them, except the light in the bathroom was on and casting a faint beam of light onto my bed, which was very much occupied. I tossed my keys on the bistro table and walked toward the bed. My eyes locked on the chocolate-brown pair that were watching me carefully.

She was naked. Sitting up on her knees and looking at me like I had all the answers. Her auburn hair hung loose all the way to her waist, offering a small amount of coverage for the very pink tips of her breasts, which tightened and peaked as I drew closer to her. It wasn’t until my knees were touching the very edge of the mattress that I noticed around her slender wrists shiny metal handcuffs had her hands locked together in front of her. My heart started to race and I had to blink several times to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.

We just stared at each other for a long-drawn-out moment. I needed to ask her why she was here after all this time. I needed to know what all of this meant. Instead I reached out a single finger to push some of her hair off of her shoulder so it wasn’t covering her up anymore and I could let my eyes feast on all of her. She was so beautiful. I grasped the chain that kept the handcuffs together and gave it a little tug to draw her closer to me. She crawled toward me without a word.

“I bought you a house today.” The truth of that statement rang steady in my voice. Her mouth fell open in a little gasp of surprise.

“What are you talking about?” I tugged on the handcuffs again until I had her arms high enough to loop them around my neck. All her plush and naked curves pressed into me and I finally felt finished. She was what I needed to be a complete man. Whole.

“I bought a house today. But I need you to make it a home, Royal.” I bent my forehead down so that it was resting against hers. I shouldn’t have been pouring my heart out to her until I knew why she was here, if this was as real for her as it was for me. It was going to kill me if she walked out again. “What’s up with the hardware, Red?”

The metal around her wrists was hard and cold around my neck.

“Well, I had this brilliant idea to show you that I trusted you, that I need you more than I need the truth. I figured getting naked and handcuffing myself to your bed would not only illustrate that I do trust you to do the right thing by me but also fulfill one of the fantasies you’ve been throwing around since the beginning. Only I forgot you don’t have a headboard, let alone a headboard I could attach these to.”

“No one has a headboard made for handcuffs in the real world.”

She rolled her eyes and a smile tugged at her mouth. I was a goner. I wasn’t going to let her go again even if she wanted me to, but I needed to know why she was suddenly here, so I told her, “We need to talk about your change of heart, Royal.”

She lifted one of her burnished eyebrows at me and her dark eyes danced in merriment. “I know. But I’m naked. I have on handcuffs and I really missed you, Asa.” She turned her head a little so that she could touch her lips to my own. “Plus you bought me a house. I think I need to say thank you in a way you’ll always remember.”

My better judgment told me to figure out where this was leading, to remind her that I had a major secret I was never going to be able to tell her, but she kissed me again. Every predatory instinct I had ever had roared to life with the need to claim, possess, mark, and own her forever as mine. Common sense had never been my strong suit anyway.

I tumbled her back on the bed with a growl.

CHAPTER 20

Royal

I spent weeks vacillating between the overwhelming amount of love I had for this man and the burning need to know what he was keeping from me. One day I was sure that whatever secret Asa was hiding didn’t matter because I wanted to be with him more than I wanted anything. The next I would be eaten alive with curiosity about what he was hiding, and I knew I would never be able to let it go. It was like being caught in the middle of an emotional tug-of-war between my head and my heart, and neither one was winning.

My mom kept telling me to get over him. Dom kept telling me to go after him and I had no idea what the right thing to do was. I was lonely and I missed him, but it wasn’t until Ayden called me today and told me that Asa had bought a house and that he never would have done that if it hadn’t been for me, that I really understood that I did love him enough to let him lie to me. Ayden also hinted that if I really thought about it, I could probably figure out why he was adamant that he keep this particular thing from me and that got me bogged down and long-repressed instincts churning back to life. When some of the pieces started to click into place, I had to evaluate whether I really wanted to know the truth or not. I loved him and I loved my mother, and I had a feeling prying into that particular Pandora’s box was going to change how I felt about one if not both of them forever. Plus, while Ayden wasn’t about to let the proverbial cat out of the bag, she had given me enough hints and clues on top of my suspicions to know that certain lines that were unforgivable no matter how much I loved either of them hadn’t been crossed. I knew whatever had happened between the two people I loved the most wasn’t pretty, and I was resigned to leave it at that if it meant I got to keep them both.