A Want So Wicked (A Need So Beautiful #2)(21)

“Be careful of the cliff beyond the tents,” Abe tells Marissa. “It’s a nasty fall to the bottom. Don’t go wandering off by yourself, okay?”

Marissa is frozen, and at first I’m not even sure she heard him. But then she nods slowly, before leaving to walk silently up the hill back to the party.

Abe seems rejuvenated when he gets in next to me, the interior light illuminating him. “Marissa’s not a fan,” he says. “But she wanted me to tell you good-bye.”

She didn’t say that, but I don’t want to admit that I was listening. “She seems pleasant,” I respond. “Ex-girlfriend?”

“Sort of. But she hates me now, in case that wasn’t obvious.”

“Oh, it was.”

Abe chuckles, doing a three-point turn to get the car turned around to head back toward town. When we’re moving, he reaches to brush his fingers down my arm, over the place where my scratches are now fading. “As long as you don’t hate me, Elise,” he whispers. “The rest of them can go to hell.”

My eyelids flutter and I’m suddenly tired, completely drained as if I’ve been working all night. I lean my head back against the seat, Abe’s hand slowly caressing my skin. Comforting me as I drift into a light sleep. We’re not far when a high-pitched howl breaks in the distance. Startled, I sit up, Abe’s hand falling from me. I try to see out the window but it’s too dark.

“Coyotes,” Abe says, clicking on the radio. “They come out late at night around here. Lots of vicious things do.”

The car’s headlights cut through the desert night, and ahead of us the world is blank. A film reel of desert playing over and over. I see Abe’s fingers twitch as if he means to reach for me again, but instead he adjusts the volume and puts his hands on the steering wheel.

I lean back into the seat, staring straight ahead as a voice nags at me. Because although I’m tired, I hear words in the back of my mind—even though I’m sure I never heard them said out loud.

Jump off the cliff.

CHAPTER 10

Abe touches my shoulder to wake me up when we finally arrive at my house. We’re parked in my driveway and it’s only ten thirty, a half hour early for my curfew.

“Thanks for taking me out, Abraham,” I say, my voice a little sleepy. “Who would have thought you were such a gentleman?”

He scowls. “Don’t use my full name. And I am a gentleman. Or at least I am to you.” He pauses. “Right?”

“You are indeed charming.” I unbuckle my seat belt, grabbing my purse from the floor as he shuts off the engine.

“Which is impressive. I’m usually bored with girls after one day.”

I laugh. “I must be special.”

“You have no idea,” he murmurs. “Can I walk you to your door?”

My house is dark other than the front porch light as Abe and I move toward it silently. I wonder if my dad is already asleep or if he’s waiting for me on the couch. I just hope he’s not peeking out the window.

When we stop, Abe puts his arms around my waist, holding me close to him as he looks down at me. As tall as I feel, he’s taller and I have to tip my head back to see his face. His eyes are dark and deep.

“I should go,” he says, but doesn’t pull away.

“Probably.” I’m suddenly hyperconscious of Abe against me, the way his fingers are intertwined behind my back. My heart thumps and I’m not sure if it’s from nervousness or desire.

A slow smile spreads across Abe’s face. “Can I kiss you good night?” he asks.

I swallow hard, thinking back to Marissa. The contempt in her eyes from across the fire. The pathetic way she came after him later. I don’t want that to be me. “Abe,” I start. “I don’t think so. I don’t want us to end up hating each other.”

“You could never hate me.”

“Crazier things have happened.”

He seems to consider this, but then moves to rest his palm on my neck, a tender spot just under my jaw. “We could just try it,” he whispers. “If it doesn’t feel good we could stop.”

My stomach flutters at the thought. “Chances are, it will feel great. That’s not what I’m worried about.”

“Then you worry too much.”

I’m about to tell him that he sounds like a trashy-romance-novel hero when he leans down and brings his mouth right to the corner of mine, but not touching me. “Can I kiss you now?”

“I . . .” His breath is warm across my lips, his thumb gently stroking my jaw. But when I close my eyes, there is only panic and guilt. “I can’t.”

Abe sighs, sounding disappointed, but not angry. “You’ll change your mind,” he says, quickly kissing my cheek before letting me go. It takes me a minute to gather myself, my body still humming with adrenaline.

Abe backs away, holding up his hand to say good-bye. “Have a nice evening, Elise,” he calls. “Told you I wouldn’t ruin you yet.” And with that, he turns to leave.

I watch after him, not sure why I didn’t kiss him. He’s certainly cute enough. Sweet. Charming. But at the same time, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Maybe everyone’s right. Maybe I do need therapy.

I go inside, and my dad and Lucy are asleep, the house still as I crawl into bed. I think about Madame Marceline. I’ll find her tomorrow. I’ll ask her exactly what’s going on with me. I just hope she has an answer.