A Season of Angels (Angels Everywhere #1)(64)

“This sounds ominous.”

He chuckled, but she noticed his laughter contained a dash of concern. “I’d feel a whole lot more comfortable if we got one of those pregnancy test kits,” he continued.

“Why does it matter?” she asked, laughing off his request. “We’ll know sooner or later, won’t we?”

“You’ve been on this emotional high all week and I’m afraid if it continues much longer—”

“But I am pregnant,” she said with supreme confidence. “I know it’s finally happening for us. There’s never been any physical reason why we can’t have children. Dr. Benoit assured us of that countless times. How many times has he claimed all we need do is relax and that it’ll happen when we least expect it? I don’t know about you, Andrew, but I’m floored by this.”

“Leah, please, listen to reason.”

“Our time of waiting has passed,” she insisted, unwilling to listen to his arguments.

“If you’re so certain, then it won’t matter if you take the test now or later, will it?” Andrew pressed.

“I’m not going to buy another one of those awful test kits. I hate them.” She eased herself away from him and stiffly folded her arms. They’d been through this routine countless times and the result had always been devastatingly the same.

Negative.

No matter how long she studied the results she couldn’t make them read what she yearned for so desperately. No, she wouldn’t subject herself to that again.

“Leah, please. I just don’t want you to get yourself worked up over this. You’re a few days late and already—”

“I don’t know that I’m late. You don’t either. To my way of thinking, you’re making more of this than necessary. As you said before, if I’m pregnant, great, if not, well, then I’m not pregnant.”

He was uncharacteristically silent, but Leah knew her husband well enough to recognize how deceptive this calm could be.

“Let me do this my way,” she asked, reaching for his hand and kissing his knuckles.

He didn’t respond immediately. “I can’t stand by and watch you do this to yourself. How many times have you gone through this?” he demanded. “It’s always the same and each time your hopes go a little higher and you fall a little harder. Each time it takes you longer to recover.”

Leah knew what he was saying was true, but this was different. This time she’d throw back her head and shout for joy. This time her heart and her soul would be left intact. How she wished there was some way to reassure Andrew.

“I don’t want you to worry about me,” she said.

“I am worried.”

She leaned against him. “Don’t, please.”

“Does this mean you won’t take the home pregnancy test?” The fire crackled in the distance adding punctuation to his request.

She hated to refuse him anything, but it was necessary. Those tests dredged up far too many unpleasant memories. That was all in the past, and her future, their future, was spilling over with promise.

“No, Andrew, I won’t. Not this time.” She threw her arms into the air and fell backward so that she was sprawled across his lap, smiling up into his face. “Now kiss me, you fool.”

He closed his eyes as though to blot her out. “Leah, for the love of—”

She didn’t allow him to finish, but gripped hold of his neck and levered herself upward until her mouth met his. As familiar as she was with her husband’s body, Leah knew exactly what she needed to do to evoke a strong and positive response.

“Leah.” Her name became a helpless plea.

“I have this incredible urge to ravish you,” she whispered, opening the buttons of his neatly pressed dress shirt. He groaned when her hands met his warm skin.

“Dinner,” he managed, between slow, deep kisses.

“What about it?” she asked, rotating her hands around to his back. His heart was pounding hard and fast, but then so was her own.

“Can wait,” he told her brokenly.

Leah smiled softly to herself. “That’s what I thought.”

It wasn’t until she was dressing for work the following morning that Leah found the pregnancy test kit. How long it had been sitting on the bathroom counter she could only speculate. Probably from the night before.

The night before. A small, satisfied smile lit up her eyes. They might be an old married couple, but the lovemaking couldn’t get more incredible or more romantic than beneath a glowing Christmas tree in front of a flickering fire.

She carried the test kit into the kitchen with her and set it down on the kitchen table in front of her husband. “Is this a hint?”

“As broad as I can make it,” he said, and finished his glass of orange juice. “For the love of heaven, let’s get this agony over with.”

It was then that Leah knew.

In the beginning she was afraid he was worried about her building her hopes upon a foundation of sand. But it was more than that. Andrew was suffering the torment of the unknown himself.

For years, Andrew had disguised his feelings, not allowing her to guess how very much he wanted children.

He was studying her now, his features sharp and anxious. “How much longer will you wait?”