A Gate of Night (A Shade of Vampire #6)(29)

I choked as I tried to suppress the tears, wondering what life would’ve been like had we lived a normal one. Get it together, Sofia. You’re bearing his child. You can’t go through the whole thing depressed. I knew little about pregnancy or children, but I had it in my head that my emotions affected my child. Having had Ingrid Maslen as my mother—I’d sworn early in life that I was going to be a good mother to my children. I determined to start as early as I could.

I began to hum a tune to my unborn child. The same tune Derek had hummed to me countless times. Our song.

Never had I wished for normalcy more. I was a pregnant teenager. I wasn’t supposed to go through this alone. I needed my husband. I needed my family.

But this was the life I’d signed up for when I married Derek, and I could blame no one for that choice. Daily, I drew hope that I would be with him again, that this life within me was going to know how strong, loving, and wonderful a father Derek could be.

For now, I just need to keep myself together, stay alert and try to remain on Kiev’s good side… for Olga’s sake.

“Enjoying the breeze?”

Kiev’s voice made my heart beat faster. I caught my breath. Chills shot up my spine. He induced sheer terror in me, but I wasn’t about to show him that.

He sat beside me and shifted his attention to my stomach. “How’s the pregnancy going? I trust the fresh air has been helping. Are you not getting cold?”

Based on the smile on his face and the uppity tone of his voice, he seemed to be in a cordial mood—a good sign.

“You seem rather pleased with yourself,” I commented, maintaining a flat, civil tone with him.

“Hello to you too, Sofia. How was your day?”

“Devoid of sunlight. Yours?”

Just like The Shade, The Blood Keep was under an eternal night. No mornings. No sunshine. As much as I loved The Shade, I couldn’t imagine raising my child never seeing sunlight. Suddenly, the house Derek and I had checked out back in California seemed like heaven.

“You didn’t seem to mind the lack of sunlight when you were at The Shade.” He grabbed the picnic basket I had with me. Olga had prepared the food inside the basket. Kiev thumbed through the food there. “This looks healthy. You haven’t even touched it.”

I wasn’t thrilled about having him around, but it didn’t look like he was going to give me a choice. “The Shade was home.” It was enough that Derek was there.

“The Blood Keep is your home now.”

Never.

He threw me a bag of sliced apples. “Eat.”

I didn’t want to irk him, so I took the bag and took a bite from one of the slices.

Most of the time, Kiev was kind to me—or at least he tried to be. I never did understand why. At first, I’d thought it was because of an attraction toward me, but he had made no advances on me since he’d arrived from The Shade.

I was dying to know what had happened at The Shade and what had happened to my husband—but the island and Derek were topics that were not to be broached if I wanted to remain unhurt, unscathed.

“Those sketches…” Kiev eyed the sketchbook I had on my lap. “They’re all of him?”

I took another bite from the apple and chewed silently. My silence was enough of an answer.

“Why do you torture yourself this way, Sofia?” He reached for the sketchbook and began looking at the sketches. He seemed to get annoyed by it, because he eventually tossed the book back to me. “Forget him.”

“That’s never going to happen, Kiev, and you know it. Derek’s not going to stop looking for me. He’ll destroy this whole place if he has to.”

Kiev’s eyes flickered with anger. He grabbed me by the jaw. He gripped hard, enough to make me yelp in pain. “I would think that you already know better than that, Sofia. Your husband wasn’t what he once was, and even at the height of his power, he was a slave to this place. Just like you are now,” he said through gritted teeth. “Don’t irk me further by talking about these daydreams of yours.”

I glared at him, my sense of defiance and independence rising over my fear of him. Just to annoy him further, I looked him straight in the eye, and continued to talk about Derek. “He’s going to come for me and you know it. He’s going to hold my child in his arms and he’s going to be a great father. He already managed to escape this place, didn’t he? What makes you think he won’t know how to return?”

Kiev frowned, his grip tightening. For a minute, I thought he was going to hit me, but then I was reminded of who was going to suffer for what I did.

“I’m sorry,” I quickly breathed out. “I just… I’m sorry, Kiev.”

“Olga’s going to have a rough night thanks to you.” He didn’t seem pleased with the prospect, his fists clenching.

I wondered whether he was clenching them to defend Olga or to punish her. With him, I never knew. Most of the time, he seemed to really care about the young girl. I even thought it hurt him more to cause her pain than it did me.

“Don’t hurt her. I made a mistake. It won’t happen again.”

He pushed my face away, my head jerking backwards. “Olga told me that you asked her where the food you’re being given comes from. I want to know why.”

I answered with a shrug. “I’m just curious. I have no idea where this place is. I was just wondering where The Blood Keep gets its food.”