A Fool's Gold Christmas (Fool's Gold #9.5)(57)
She glanced at her wrist—not that she was wearing a watch. “Oh, look at the time. I need to grab some lunch before the pets arrive. I’ll see you after the first of the year.”
She released the chair and willed her body to stay strong. All she had to do was grab her bag, and then she could escape. If she could just have a few minutes by herself, she could get her feelings under control and survive the day.
“Evie, wait.”
She kept on walking. She could see her purse on a table. She reached for the handle and continued toward the exit. Once outside, she broke into a run. Her previously injured leg protested a little, but not enough to slow her down. She turned at the first corner she came to, and then another, ending up on the edge of the big park in town. It was cold and gray, but there still wasn’t any snow.
She put her hand on the bark of a bare tree and tried to catch her breath. Only instead of inhaling, she began to sob. Deep, soul-ripping sobs that welled up from deep inside of her.
He was leaving. Dante was leaving. Worse, he was going to be with someone else. There was another woman he would laugh with and talk to and make love with. Someone else would hear his silly jokes and know the warmth of his body first thing in the morning. Someone else would be with him for Christmas.
After not being willing to trust herself enough to love anyone, she’d finally given her heart, only to have it tossed back at her. Dante didn’t love her, and he certainly didn’t want her to love him. He’d told her that from the beginning. She just hadn’t been listening. She hadn’t believed.
And now he was gone, and somehow, she had to get through days and days of activities, including the performance on Christmas Eve.
She gulped in air, then straightened. She could do it, she told herself. She was strong. She’d handled worse and survived, she would get through this. The trick was to not let anyone know. Sympathy, while well meant, would only make it harder to go on. When Christmas was over, she would figure out how she was supposed to stop loving him, but for now, she would simply put one foot in front of the other. After all, she was used to dancing through the pain.
Chapter Eighteen
“I love him!”
The girl speaking was maybe six or seven. She hung on to the large black Labrador mix with both arms. The dog, probably four or five and still skinny from being abandoned and trying to survive in the mountains, wagged his tail back and forth, obviously pleased by the turn of events.
Evie did her best to get lost in the moment, to feel happy for the family and their new pet. The young couple took the offered food and the information on care.
“We went to the shelter several times,” the wife said happily. “He’s perfect for us. We’re calling him Wally.”
The little girl beamed up at her parents. “I’m so happy, I almost don’t need presents this year.”
“That’s pretty happy,” her dad said.
She nodded. “We could ask Santa to take them to children who don’t have a new puppy.”
The parents exchanged a look of pride and love.
“That’s very nice,” her mother said. “Let’s talk about that when we get home.”
Evie handed over their dog license and the rest of the paperwork. “Have a great holiday,” she said and watched them walk away, Wally trotting at their side.
“Another happy ending,” May said as she walked over with more completed forms in her hand. “We’ve found homes for all the puppies and kittens, which isn’t a surprise but is still nice. Most of the cats are claimed. Someone took all the fish earlier. Did you see that? I don’t understand fish as pets. They can’t even interact.”
“I think you’re just supposed to watch them.”
“I’d rather watch a movie.” Her mother gave her a quick hug. “I see you’re adopting that cat.”
“Alexander. I’m taking him home with me this afternoon.”
“I hope you’ll be very happy together.” Her mother studied her for a second. “Are you all right? You’ve been quiet today.”
“I’m fine,” Evie said quickly. “Just tired from everything I have to get done. The performance isn’t that many days away and we start full rehearsals on the actual stage next week. I need to make sure my dancers are comfortable with the entire show. All those seats are intimidating.”
She hoped talking about the upcoming performance was enough of a distraction to get her mother to stop asking questions. Eventually she would have to come clean about what had happened with Dante, but right now she couldn’t talk about it. Not only was her heart breaking, but she was also left feeling stupid. It was as if she’d had a party and no one came. There were decorations and food and music, but no guests. While she’d been busy falling in love, Dante had been looking for a way out. He’d found a good one, too.
All she had to do was get through the rest of the afternoon. Then she could go home and have a private meltdown.
May stared at her. Her gaze was so intent that Evie was sure she’d figured out the truth.
“I know what it is,” her mother said at last, then startled Evie by suddenly starting to cry. “It’s all my fault.”
“That’s not possible,” Evie said, as tears filled May’s eyes and spilled down her cheeks.
“Of course it is. You’re my daughter and I love you so much. But I lost you because I was stupid, and what if you never forgive me? What if I’ve done too much damage? What if you can’t forgive me?”