A Castle of Sand (A Shade of Vampire #3)(81)

I love her. I can’t keep doing this to her.

I ran both hands through my hair, not knowing what to do. I’d reached the point where I couldn’t live without her, but neither could I live with her without destroying her. It felt like I’d been sitting there for an eternity, just gazing at her and chastising myself for taking advantage of her by drinking her blood once again. Still, the taste of her lingered on my mouth—sweet and enticing… So enraptured was I by what just happened, by my own confusion and my own guilt that I practically jumped from my seat when someone began knocking on the door.

I grimaced at the idea of it being Zinnia. I then realized that while I was indulging myself making dinner out of Sofia, she hadn’t had a bite to eat since we arrived. I quickly opened the door, certain that it was somebody bringing her something to eat only to find myself disappointed to find Aiden Claremont standing on our doorstep.

“My daughter?” he asked. Straightforward and curt.

“Asleep.”

“Good. We need to have a talk, you and me.”

I nodded. He stepped in and I closed the door behind him. He spun around to face me. “Every single human in this building—me included—perhaps my daughter being the only exception—wants you dead.”

At that, I couldn’t help but chuckle wryly. “So I’ve gathered.”

“The great Derek Novak. One of the best hunters the order has ever known…now prince of the vampires.”

King actually…I looked up at him…but then you don’t really need to know that.

“This thing you have with my daughter stops now. You can’t keep using her for whatever reason you have for wanting her.”

“I’m in love with her,” I said through gritted teeth. “I fully intend to marry her.”

“Marry her? She’s mortal! If you loved her, you wouldn’t deprive her of the future she deserves. You wouldn’t deprive her of an education, a family, children of her own…”

At that, I couldn’t find a proper response. I’d been plagued by that thought ever since Sofia returned to The Shade. I knew I was being selfish with her.

“Be straight with me, Novak. Man to man. Have you had a drink of my daughter’s blood?”

I looked Aiden in the eye and nodded, guilt once again washing over me. His fists clenched and he stepped forward and I wouldn’t have blamed him if he socked me right in the jaw, but he held back.

“You are only safe from us until after Ben Hudson’s burial. It’s you she’s running to for comfort. It’s you she needs. After the burial is over, you will return to your cursed island—wherever it is—and you are never to see my daughter again. And you will leave without telling her.”

He knows about The Shade. He just doesn’t know where it is. I knew the risk involved if I should ever travel back to The Shade directly from the hunters’ headquarters. A plan of action formed in my mind, and I realized that in my head, I’d already agreed to his terms. I simply couldn’t be around Sofia. If I stay with her, I will ruin her. I can’t do that. Not to her.

I nodded at Aiden. “All right. But know, sir, that I love your daughter like I’ve never loved anyone before.”

“Empty words coming from a vampire.” He scoffed. “I’m not sure your kind is capable of love.”

I once again looked at the bite marks on Sofia’s neck and found myself thinking, I’m not sure either.

EPILOGUE: SOFIA

Truth be told, I found it terrifying how much I’d allowed myself to need Derek. While going through the motions of Ben’s burial, having to look Lyle, Amelia and Abby in the eye and tell them what had happened, Derek was there for me, holding my hand, being strong when I was not.

Since the first night of our arrival at Hawk Headquarters, he’d not dared take a drink of my blood again. It was clear to see how guilt-ridden he was over the whole encounter. Aiden had been providing him with packets of animal blood to keep him from starving. Still, it didn’t escape my notice how he often swallowed hard whenever we touched.

I knew he was tormented about something, but he was in a world all on his own, and nothing I did seemed to be able to penetrate through his walls—not the same way I was able to before.

It felt like he was slipping away from me…a sandcastle being washed away by cruel, violent waves.

But Derek wasn’t the only reason for the chaos in my heart and mind. The mysteries of my past were about to unravel full force and I was completely unprepared for it. Tossing and turning in my bed, dreams reminded me of memories I’d tucked away, deep in my subconscious.

I was listening to the pitter-patter of the rain over our roof, watching droplets form on my bedroom window. I was delighted to hear the familiar growl of a vehicle pulling up in our gravel driveway. I knew what that sound meant. Mommy’s home.

I loved my babysitter, but there was nothing like cuddling against the familiar contours of my mother’s body. I always thought of her as the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.

But when I saw her face that night, I could immediately tell that something was different about her. She wasn’t looking at me with delight. She was looking at me the same way I did the cookies stashed in one of the kitchen jars.

“Hello, baby,” she greeted me before pushing my bedroom door wide open. “I want you to meet someone.”