A Break of Day (A Shade of Vampire #7)(55)

“Hey!” Zinnia’s voice sounded out from across the open space. She jogged toward us, Gavin by her side.

“Sweet Jesus, what happened?” Gavin said on seeing the two babies and Aiden as a Hawk.

I recounted the details of our adventure to them as they listened in awe. After I’d finished, Zinnia went up to Aiden and gave him a hug.

“I’m glad you’re back, sir.” She grinned. “I missed you.”

“I guess I missed you too, kiddo.” He smiled.

“Um… Sofia?” Gavin’s voice now took on a serious tone. “I hope you don’t mind, but we held a funeral ceremony while you were gone. All the bereaved families, we needed to do something for them to help soothe their pain. And we didn’t want to wait around, what with all the bodies…”

It cut me to the core that I hadn’t been there for it. I thought of all the innocent lives lost at the hands of the Elders, people Derek and I were duty-bound to give protection to. I thought of the immunes those evil spirits had managed to sneak through to Cruor already, lives we could never reclaim.

I thought of Sam.

And I thought of Xavier.

I knelt down on the ground and said a prayer, holding a small ceremony of my own for them.

Chapter 40: Vivienne

A gust of sea wind blew against my face, drying the tears and making my eyes sting.

I sat on a high mountain plateau overlooking the most magnificent view of the island. The waves crashing against the shore and the gentle swaying of the redwoods seemed to dance to some kind of untold rhythm.

Peace.

That was what this was. A peace was settling over the ravaged island, slowly drawing its inhabitants back to comfort. Inviting them back to the routine of daily life.

I had a choice whether to let it draw me in too, or whether to continue stirring up the storm within me and cling on to dreams of an impossible future.

I shifted on the ground, moving closer to where I remembered last sitting with Xavier the night he was possessed. I touched the grass next to me, hoping to feel the shape of Xavier’s body molded there.

Then I stood up and walked over to the edge of the cliff. And I wondered if, had I not been such a fool and instead given myself to Xavier years before, he would have been stronger in resisting the Elders. I wondered whether my constant resistance had weakened his spirit and resolve to live.

There are some cliffs that are just too late to jump from, Vivienne.

I sat down and dangled my legs off of the edge of the mountain. Then I lay back and gazed up at the stars.

I replayed in my head those last few words we’d exchanged that fateful night, as I’d already done a hundred times since.

“You said you’d wait until I’m ready.”

“And I’d do that, Vivienne. You know I would, but…”

But…

“What were you going to say, Xavier?” I whispered out loud, looking up at the stars, hoping his spirit was somehow watching over me. “But… you just wanted to hear it from me? You just wanted to hear me say those three simple words?”

Tears began to stream more heavily down my face.

“Well, I’ll say them now to you, Xavier… my love. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.” I felt like a crazy person repeating the words over and over again. I’d started in a whisper but soon worked myself up into a frenzy, bellowing against the harsh wind.

“I LOVE YOU, XAVIER!” I screamed until my voice cracked. I broke down, my body utterly exhausted and racked with sobs.

“I love you too.”

The smooth baritone voice I ached to hear.

I smiled, my eyes still closed. Is this what happens when you cherish a memory of someone so much—you start to hear their voice in your head? Then I will cherish you forever, my love, to continue hearing that sweet voice of yours…

“I love you, Vivienne.”

There it was again.

I rolled onto my back and opened my eyes, expecting to take in the beauty of the stars. And while I beheld their beauty, my eyes were met with so much more.

The face of my beloved, staring down at me, a smile etched on his lips. The unshaven face of that beautiful dark-haired man I craved with every fiber of my being.

I reached up, expecting my hand to pass right through the apparition.

“Ouch, Vivienne. That was my eye.”

Now you’ve done it, Vivienne. You’ve gone mad. You’ve truly gone mad.

I sat up and looked at the ghost of Xavier. I extended my hand once again, this time aiming for his cheek. It was rough with stubble. I brushed my fingers over his lips. They were soft and moist. I wondered what would happen if I kissed them. Whether I would be able to feel his lips against mine, or whether he might vanish before I could experience such a pleasure.

I didn’t need to wait long to find out. Strong arms enveloped my waist and pulled me against him. And then came his kiss. Gentle at first, his lips brushing against the corners of mine, tracing the outline of my mouth, and then increasing in intensity until I was absorbed in his taste.

As I breathed in his scent, tears fell afresh from my eyes. Delirious tears of ecstasy.

“I love you, Xavier… I-I wanted to t-tell you…”

“I know. I know,” he whispered into my ear, cupping my face with his large hands. “And, um, I’d be surprised if there’s a single person on this island who doesn’t know after that…”