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EP: And what about Kaavi?

TF: Okay, look, I didn’t want her to get hurt. Not like this. I just wanted her exposed. She deserved to be exposed. She’s such a fucking fraud. Forget the years she spent belittling and outshining me. Lecturing me and pretending she was better than everyone else. Forget all of that. What kind of friend marries her best friend’s ex-boyfriend anyway? There was something seriously fucked-up in her head. And still, and still, she’d never be anything but my father’s little princess while the rest of us are just forgotten.

EP: Sounds like you have a lot of pent-up anger toward your sister.

TF: Well, duh. Of course. But I didn’t hurt her, if that’s what you’re getting at. I hate her, sure. But my parents would probably set up some sort of shrine for her or something, if she died. She’d be a fucking martyr if she was murdered. If I can’t compare to her while she’s alive, could you imagine what a disappointment I’d be if she was dead?

No, I just thought, well, Amaya being here will stir up some old feelings. I mean, I knew what Amaya was thinking—she wanted closure. She told me so. That was all she wanted.

EP: When did she tell you this?

TF: [Pause]

EP: Miss Fonseka, could you please elaborate on when Miss Amaya told you that she wanted closure?

TF: Okay, look. This is going to sound fucked-up, but you have to know that I didn’t mean any harm. I just—damn, I’m just sick of being left in the dark about everything, okay?

EP: I understand. Please go on.

TF: Well, I always thought there was something strange about Amaya. The way she lurked around my family. The way she hung on to every word my father said but gave my mother and me the cold shoulder. Even though my sister and her were inseparable, I knew something wasn’t right.

And then there was that summer, five years ago, when she suddenly showed up in Colombo and stayed with my family. I wasn’t here at the time. I took a leave of absence from my university and traveled to India. It wasn’t a rehabilitation center, as many here like to call it, you know. I just needed time off to reset and find myself. College in New York was harder than I thought it would be, my grades were slipping, and I’d met this guy . . .

Anyways, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something . . . happened. Something bad. I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors by now—about her and my father. The timing of Nadia’s adoption always felt off to me. My parents had never discussed having another child before, much less adopting. And then Amaya just, well, disappeared. Okay, look, don’t get me wrong. I was happy she was finally out of our lives. But like I said . . .

It started out as just a way to keep tabs on her at first. I used to check her Facebook and Instagram, just to see what she was up to. To be sure she was keeping her distance from my family. She was hardly on social media though. I couldn’t really get a sense of her life. Then I noticed she had shared a post from some support group—Dr. Dunn’s, I think. He’s some famous podcast motivational speaker. I joined the group, just to check it out. Just to see what she was up to. Turned out she was very active on there. I just lurked, at first.

Okay, look, I don’t want you to think I’m some sort of creep. You have to understand. Amaya went from practically living at our house, to being closer than I ever was to Kaavi, to being adored by my father, to suddenly vanishing from our lives. I was just curious. About what happened, about Nadia, about whether she ever planned on coming back.

But then Kaavi announced that she was going to the US for her college reunion. And I wanted to know whether Amaya and she were meeting up. I tried asking Kaavi but she was cagey about it—she never really spoke to me about shit anyway. I wanted Amaya to stay away. She never brought anything but bad news, and things had finally settled down. And so I created a profile, under a different name, and I sent her a message.

EP: I see, and when did you first establish contact with Miss Bloom this way?

TF: Probably around [Pause] I think it was around August, the year before last.

EP: So that was about one and a half years ago. And what was the nature of these messages?

TF: Nothing damaging. Nothing wrong. I just befriended her. Of course, I couldn’t tell her who I really was, you know. She’d never have spoken to me, not honestly anyway. I just wanted to make sure she was still in LA, not San Francisco, where my sister was going for this bullshit reunion. Kaavi tries to be tough, but I know their friendship broke her heart, even though I never learned what happened. That was probably why she was going to the reunion to begin with—to try and speak to Amaya.

And then, my online friendship with Amaya, well, it just got out of control. She was suddenly messaging me at all hours, confiding in me, trusting me. I thought it would be a good idea to keep the conversation open. Just so I could try to learn more. About what happened.

EP: And all this time she thought you were someone else?

TF: Yes, she still does. She thinks my name is Beth, a call center associate from Milwaukee with a history of drug abuse.





16


AMAYA


Day of the Poruwa Ceremony


I WOKE UP to a text from Beth.

How are you holding up?





I didn’t feel like responding. How was I holding up? I wasn’t holding up at all. I was barely holding on. But I didn’t feel like talking to anyone right now, because I couldn’t face being honest. Not that I had to face Beth at all. Not that I ever had to truly face Beth, if I didn’t want to, even though she was easily my closest friend.