Yellow Wife(6)

“Working on it, Ruthy. Pheby’s birthday is still two seasons away.”

“Wantin’ her far up north. Where her freedom matters.”

Master slurped up his stew. “Ruthy, this is delicious.” He moved the bread around in his bowl for the last drop, then pushed back his seat, satisfied. “Taking you down to Charleston with me in a few days. Make sure you tie up loose ends.”

Mama nodded her head. “But what is the plan for Delores?”

“There is a school in Massachusetts that I have been in contact with. She will be older than the other girls, but with all that Sally taught her, she will do fine.”

“A real school?” Mama showed her teeth.

“Our Pheby will have a good life. Now, you quit worrying me, gal, and bring me some more wine.”

Mama rose and did as she was told. Master reached into his pocket and held out a square piece of chocolate wrapped in shiny gold paper.

“Thanks for the song today.” He winked.

I stood and curtsied.

“Delores, get on back to the Big House now before you missed.”

I kissed Mama on the cheek and shoved the chocolate into my skirt pocket. It was not until I had started on the path to the stables that I realized I had forgotten my shawl. The wind stirred up, causing goose pimples to sprout across my arms, such that I considered roaming back. But then I remembered the one time I interrupted one of Master’s visits to the loom house and caught Mama laid across the bed with her dress up, while Master’s pants were gathered around his feet. His pale white hind parts moved back and forth, and he groaned like a wounded animal—the sound that lingered in my head for months. Mama caught me standing frozen at the top of the ladder. She made her eyes large and mouthed for me to go, so I did. When I finally returned to the loom house later that night, Mama waited with a bowl of split pea soup.

“Ain’t many choices for a slave woman. Just know everything I do is for you. I’ma die a slave. I knows that. But you, baby, you are meant to see freedom. I’s makin’ sure.”

After that night, we came up with a signal. Candle in the window meant clear to come up. No candle, keep walking.



* * *



When I reached the stables, nightfall swallowed me in darkness. I coughed three times and then Essex opened the side door and drew me in. He smelled like a mix of soap and cedar, and I pressed into his skin.

“Hey, beautiful. Thought you weren’t coming.” He kissed me until I felt warm and sticky, and I placed my hands on his chest to restore my breathing.

“Mama held me up.”

I followed him up the ladder to his flatbed loft over the haystacks. A single candle burned but did not mask the odor of damp animals and droppings.

“How do you sleep up here with these smelly horses?” I pinched my nose.

“Sleeping with the animals is how I become Massa to them.” He untied my headscarf and released my curls. “Got something for you.”

“What is it?” I sat cross-legged with my skirt pulled down over my feet.

“Close your eyes and no peeking.”

I could hear him rummaging around. “Now, open them.”

My lids blinked open to see Essex holding up two leather strips. Hanging from each was a wooden carving of a half of a heart.

“This one for you.” He took one of the necklaces and tied it around my neck. “Just a little something to hold us over till I can marry you properly and get us ’ways from here.”

I touched the heart to my lips. Then he gave me the other necklace and I tied it around his neck.

“I love it.” I nuzzled my nose against his chin stubble until I felt him blush. “Thank you kindly.”

“Anything for you.”

Essex made a pillow out of hay and wrapped it in a piece of cloth. We settled back into the nook of the loft until our bodies were flush against each other. His strong arms around me made me feel safe. Essex nosed my hair, trailed his lips in sweet kisses down the side of my face until he found my mouth.

“You taste like sugarcane.” He undid the buttons to my top, fondling away my chemise until he cupped my breasts with both hands. I arched and groaned as he massaged my nipples. Heat rose between us. I could sense desire taking over my reason and logic, so I kissed him one last time and then elbowed him away.

“What’s the matter? Don’t you want me?” he panted.

I fastened my buttons. “More than words can say.”

“Then what is it?”

“Mama said not to catch no babies till I am free. Only a few more months, then we can leave this place and have as many babies as we want.”

“You believe Massa’s promise?”

I nodded. “Tonight he told Mama he was sending me to a school in Massachusetts. How much you save up for your freedom?”

“Round one hundred dollars since Massa been letting me hire myself out. But Parrott said a good stable boy like me worth two, three times more.”

“What are we going to do?”

Essex leaned in real close and made his eyes big. “I aims to run if I have to.”

“Hush that talk.”

He put his mouth on my ear. “I have been testing how far I can get when I’s working the horses on other plantations. Making a plan.”

“You talking foolish, Essex Henry.”