Wraith(65)

‘No problem.’

He looked surprised, as if he’d been expecting me to argue. He was right about one thing: he really didn’t know me very well. I offered a meek smile and his expression relaxed. Poor Gabriel, I thought, telling myself it was pity and not guilt that I was feeling.

‘Before we go, tell me something.’

I raised my eyebrows. ‘Yes?’

‘What’s your favourite colour?’

‘Blue.’

Gabriel smiled. ‘Like the sky.’

Yeah. So? ‘What’s yours?’

His eyes dropped to my lips. ‘Dusky pink,’ he murmured. He grinned at my expression. ‘Okay. I really like yellow the most. Like sunlight. What’s your favourite type of music?’

It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him I’d not heard proper music for months but that wasn’t what was going on here. I gazed at him, vaguely exasperated. ‘R&B, I guess. You?’

‘Classical.’

I managed not to roll my eyes.

Gabriel smirked. ‘I have a penchant for Rihanna as well.’

I scoffed and moved for the door. He caught my hand and pulled me back. He scanned my face, suddenly looking serious. ‘I know you’re holding a great deal back from me, Saiya, and I know you don’t really trust me. Colours and music don’t mean that I know you well as a person. I don’t need to know those kinds of things to feel the connection we have between us and how deep it runs.’ He took my hand and placed it against his heart. ‘Our hearts beat in unison now. I’m not being cheesy – it’s actually true.’

He let out a short laugh but the look in his eyes intensified and his pupils darkened until they were almost black. ‘I’d been prepared for the physical sensations my Fior Ghal would inspire but I hadn’t expected the emotional sensations to be so extreme as well. We might have met under traumatic circumstances and you might despise me for not acting sooner to help Stirling but I promise you one thing: I will spend the rest of my life proving that I’m worthy of you. Whatever it takes.’

My mouth was dry. Underneath my fingers, I felt the steady thrum of his heartbeat. He was right, it did mirror my own, but that did nothing to make me feel better. I tried to remember how he’d treated my shadow form. I tried to remember that I hated being touched and that I was really nothing more to him than a vessel for his child. In the end all I could do was pull away and ignore the brief flash of disappointment in his face.

‘Let’s go,’ I muttered. ‘It will take us a while to walk round.’ I didn’t look at him again, I simply walked out of the room.

But when I heard his footsteps following me, I did relax. Infinitesimally, anyway.

***

I wasn’t ambling carelessly around Stirling Castle because I could; I had a definite destination. Ghrashbreg had stated that the wraith was being held in the dungeons. He wouldn’t have very long left. By my estimate, his shadow must have been separate from his real body for at least twelve hours; much longer and he’d pass the point where he’d have the energy to slip unnoticed out of the city. The Gneiss goblins could be holding his physical form and they might destroy him for his failure to kill Ange. I couldn’t let him give up on escape. If there was a way to help him, I would find it.

I took a circuitous route because the last thing I wanted Gabriel to know was my destination. As he caught me up, I paused at a portrait of an extraordinarily ugly looking goblin and pretended to be interested in the brush strokes. Then I headed outside. I stopped in the inner courtyard and glanced around, as if not sure where to go next.

‘There’s a pretty garden over to the east,’ Gabriel murmured.

I didn’t want to go there, I wanted to go in the opposite direction. I’d never been inside the building where the castle dungeons were located but I knew where it was. I tilted my head towards Gabriel and managed a smile. ‘That sounds good although…’

‘What?’

I shrugged and looked abashed. ‘I’d quite like to see the sunset from up here. Any time I’ve been here before, I’ve been working in the kitchens at this hour and not had the chance to see it. Considering the views you can get up here, it must be something.’

His expression softened. ‘You’re more of a romantic than I realised.’

No, I thought sadly; I’m just better at lying than you realise. It occurred to me that I really wanted to tell him the truth but I knew it would cause more complications than I could deal with right now. Instead I smiled and he returned it with a dazzling glimmer of white teeth that made my heart lurch. Then he turned towards the left and the western side of the castle where we could enjoy the sunset together – and where I would have easy access to the dungeons.

We passed numerous goblins. At one point, I spotted Boxburn, the Filit to whom I'd promised some nettle soup. He glanced in my direction and for a moment it seemed as if he were coming over and speak to me but his eyes drifted to Gabriel and he swallowed, before quickly turning on his heel and heading in the opposite direction. Interesting.

Although my motive for heading to the western wall was sneaky, I couldn’t help being impressed by the view when we got there. From the edge of the sandstone parapet, rolling hills with a faint covering of evening fog stretched out as far as the eye could see. Majestic trees dotted the landscape, their verdant green visible even from this distance.