Wolf Girl (Wolf Girl, #1)(52)

“I can’t be held down,” I told him, my face still in my hands.

Two warm hands grasped my forearms and peeled them away from my face, until I was staring at yellow eyes. “Did someone hurt you, Demi?” His voice was that scary half wolf growl.

I swallowed hard, releasing a deep sigh. “It’s my turn to tell you something.” I pulled my arms out of his and patted the bed.

His entire body was tense, jaw clenched as he sat next to me. “You can tell me anything. But first, are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

The fact that he was being so sweet just made those half unshed tears pour over. “I’m fine, you didn’t hurt me. This is … an old emotional pain that resurfaced.”

He was silent, still, unreadable other than the yellow eyes that kept peeking out behind his lashes.

It was on the tip of my tongue, but I wasn’t ready, so I just sat there, trying not to think about that night. Other than Raven and my mom and dad, no one knew my story. It was something we all covered up at my request and tried to move on from. Sometimes burying old wounds worked and sometimes they rose up like zombies waking from the dead.

Finally, when I couldn’t take it anymore, I spoke. “When I was fifteen, I went to a party in Vampire City…” I breathed.

His eyebrows rose like that was impossible and I nodded. “My best friend Raven and I snuck out with a vampire girl at Delphi and we went to a party with older guys.”

Those yellow eyes were back as he sat rigid next to me. “What happened?” he growled, but I knew that the anger wasn’t at me, it was at what he knew was about to come out of my mouth in the next sentence.

“I was gang raped by four vampires and left for dead—” I didn’t even finish my sentence before the splitting of seams ripped through the space and Sawyer shifted into his wolf. His clothes tore to tatters as his giant gray wolf landed on all fours and looked up at me with pained yellow eyes. Tears streamed down my face as his wolf leapt up from the ground and nuzzled my neck, placing his paws on my shoulders like a hug.

A soft wolfie hug.

A sob escaped me as I wrapped my arms around his giant furry wolf and held him closely. “I think that’s when my soul split. The cuffs, they kept me human, so I couldn’t fight back.” I tried to breathe to calm myself down, but my throat felt so tight as his wolf draped across my body like a blanket and I held him. “I don’t remember it. I mean I do, but in flashes, the before, a little of the during, and then way after. There was so much blood, three of the four guys were killed … it looked like an animal had attacked them, but now…” A cry ripped from my throat. “I think that my wolf somehow broke free and saved my life.” I had held this in for so long that now that it was out, I couldn’t stop the floodgates. “She saved me,” I wept, “and that’s why I am this way, that’s why I’m broken.”

I squeezed his wolf so tightly I was afraid I would break his ribs and reinjure him, but he just lay on top of me like a loyal animal therapy dog or something and let me get it all out. When he realized I was done, he licked the tears from my cheeks and I laughed. “Gross.”

He pushed off of me and started to shift back and I suddenly was nervous about seeing Sawyer in his human form after divulging all that. Telling a soft fluffy wolf your darkest secret was a lot different that a six-foot-six-inch-tall Adonis. Sawyer turned away and I caught a glimpse of his naked butt as he walked into his closet. He returned with basketball shorts and a t-shirt on.

When he reached me, I avoided eye contact as he fell to his knees before me. He was patient, waiting until I looked at him, and when I did I was shocked at the anger I saw in his eyes. I frowned, and he reached out and brushed a finger over my cheek. “Nothing about you is broken.”

The tears were back as I realized I’d waited for a man I loved to hear my story and tell me that.

I just nodded.

“And in the future, I will let you take the lead in the bedroom,” he said, but his words didn’t match his blazing gaze and steel jaw.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, suddenly wondering if he was mad at me.

Sawyer stood. “I’m going to need the name of the guy left alive from that night, Demi.”

My mouth popped open. “What? No wa—”

Sawyer’s chest started to heave up and down, fur running down his arms. “I’m going to need that name, Demi. Now.”

The bossy alpha was back. I stood and so did he as I butted my chest up against his. “My parents filed a complaint with Vampire City, but they said since I was banished I had no protection.”

Sawyer fled from the room and then there was a crashing noise in the living room.

Holy shit, this man had a temper.

I hobbled out to see that he’d kicked the coffee table in half. It lay in a splintered wood pile at his feet. He looked up at me, barely holding on to his humanity. “Demi, I need that name before I go and light the entirety of Vampire City on fire!”

My eyes nearly fell out of my head. “Sawyer, it was five years ago—”

“Name!” He fisted his hands and they shook. I’d seen my father like this once in my life. The night I told him and my mom about my assault. He’d barely been able to keep his wolf inside, even with the cuffs on.

“Fine! It was fucking Vicon Drake, okay!” I screamed, and he went very still.