When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing(50)

What Adhav does is fundamentally different from delivering a Domino’s pizza. He sees one member of a family early in the morning, then another later in the day. He helps the former nourish the latter and the latter appreciate the former. Adhav is the connective tissue that keeps families together. That pizza delivery guy might be efficient, but his work is not transcendent. Adhav, though, is efficient because his work is transcendent.

He synchs first to the boss—that 10:51 a.m. train from the Vile Parle station. He synchs next to the tribe—his fellow white-hatted walas who speak the same language and know the cryptic code. But he ultimately synchs to something more sublime—the heart—by doing difficult, physically demanding work that nourishes people and bonds families.

During one of Adhav’s morning stops, on the seventh floor of a building called the Pelican, I met a man who has been using the dabbawalas’ services for fifteen years. Like so many others I encountered, he says that he’s suffered no missed, late, or errant deliveries.

But he did have one complaint.

In the remarkable journey his lunch takes from his own kitchen to Adhav’s bicycle to the first train station to a dabbawala’s back to another train station to the thronged streets of Mumbai to his office desk, “sometimes your curry is mixed with your rice.”


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* A dabbawala typically earns an average of about $210 per month—not a princely sum by Indian standards but about enough to support a rural family.





SEVEN WAYS TO FIND YOUR OWN “SYNCHER’S HIGH”

Coordinating and synchronizing with other people is a powerful way to lift your physical and psychological well-being. If your life doesn’t involve such activities now, here are some ways to find your own syncher’s high: 1. Sing in a chorus.

Even if you’ve never been part of a musical group, singing with others will instantly deliver a boost. For choral meetups around the world, go to https://www.meetup.com/topics/choir/.


2. Run together.

Running with others offers a trifecta of benefits: exercising, socializing, and synching—all in one.


3. Row crew.

Few activities require such perfect synchrony as team rowing. It’s also the complete workout: According to some physiologists, a 2,000-meter race burns as many calories as playing back-to-back full-court basketball games.


4. Dance.

Ballroom and other types of social dancing are all about synchronizing with another person and coordinating movements with music.


5. Join a yoga class.

As if you needed to hear one more reason that yoga is good for you, doing it communally may give you a synching high.


6. Flash mob.

For something more adventurous than social dancing and more boisterous than yoga, consider a flash mob—a lighthearted way for strangers to perform for other strangers. They’re usually free. And—surprise—most flash mobs are advertised in advance.


7. Cook in tandem.

Cooking, eating, and cleaning up by yourself can be a drag. But doing it together requires synchronization and can deliver uplift (not to mention a decent meal). Find tandem-cooking tips at https://www.acouplecooks.com/menu-for-a-cooking-date-tips-for-cooking-together/.





ASK THESE THREE QUESTIONS, THEN KEEP ASKING THEM

Once a group is operating in synch, members’ jobs aren’t done. Group coordination doesn’t abide by the set-it-and-forget-it logic of the Crock-Pot. It requires frequent stirring and a watchful eye. That means to maintain a well-timed group you should regularly—once a week or at least once a month—ask these three questions:

1. Do we have a clear boss—whether a person or some external standard—who engenders respect, whose role is unambiguous, and to whom everyone can direct their initial focus?

2. Are we fostering a sense of belonging that enriches individual identity, deepens affiliation, and allows everyone to synchronize to the tribe?

3. Are we activating the uplift—feeling good and doing good—that is necessary for a group to succeed?




FOUR IMPROV EXERCISES THAT CAN BOOST YOUR GROUP TIMING SKILLS

Improvisational theater requires not just quick thinking but also great synching. Timing your words and movements with other performers without the aid of a script is far more challenging than it looks to an audience. That’s why improv groups practice a variety of timing and coordination exercises. Here, recommended by improv guru Cathy Salit, are four that might work for your team: 1. Mirror, Mirror.

Find a partner and face her. Then slowly move your arms or legs—or raise your eyebrows or change your facial expression. Your partner’s job is to mirror what you do—to extend her elbow or arch her eyebrow at the same time and same pace as you. Then switch roles and let her act and you mirror. You can also do this in a larger group. Sit in a circle and mirror whatever you see from anyone else in the circle. “This usually starts subtle and then builds until the entire circle is mirroring itself,” Salit says.


2. Mind Meld.

This exercise promotes a more conceptual type of synchronization. Find a partner. You count to three together, then each one of you says a word—any word you want—at the same time. Suppose you say “banana” and your partner says “bicycle.” Now you both count to three and utter a word that somehow connects the two previous words. In this case, you both might say “seat.” Mind meld! But if the two of you offer different words, which is far more likely—suppose one says “store” and the other “wheel”—then the process repeats, counting to three and saying a word that connects “store” and “wheel.” Did you both come up with the same word? (I’m thinking “cart”—how about you?) If not, continue until you both say the same word. It’s harder than it sounds, but it really builds your mental coordination muscles.