We Own the Sky(96)



This has just crushed us even though I think deep down I knew it was

coming.  How  on  earth  can  God  be  so  cruel,  James  is  only  seven  and they say he has probably a few months, maybe even weeks and I knew it was  bad  when  he  was  diagnosed  but  thought  we  might  at  least  have  a year or two. I think my husband knew this all along but when the doctor came  I  have  never  seen  him  look  so  sad  so  broken.  Our  life  has  just gone  and  I  don’t  know  how  I  can  carry  on  if  we  lose  him  and  no  one seems to know anything, whether there’s anything now that can help and I just can’t make sense of it, I am just broken.

Re: Newly diagnosed

by Rob? Mon Jun 5, 2017 11:02 am Dear motherofdavid,

I’m  so  sorry  that  you  have  received  this  news.  There  are  no  words  to make it better. After going through this with my own son, I think there is no making sense of it and it is best not to even try, at least for now.

All you can do is cherish every moment you have together—as you say

yourself, you don’t know how long that will be.

I wish you and your family all the best. Please feel free to get in touch if you need to talk. I sent you a PM with my contact details and I’m here to listen any time.

Rob

Subject: Sorry

Sent: Wed Jun 7, 2017 12:05 pm

From: Nev

To: Rob

Dear Rob,

It’s probably too late now and there’s nothing I can say to you, but I just wanted  to  tell  you  again  how  sorry  I  am  for  what  I’ve  done.  It  was completely wrong of me and I have hurt you and countless other people.

I  am  trying  to  make  amends  and  contacting  all  of  the  parents  I  have deceived. I have also been voluntarily to my local police station to give a statement  about  my  role  in  all  this.  I  realize,  given  the  case  against  Dr.

Sladkovsky,  that  I  might  face  criminal  proceedings.  I  will  accept  any punishment for what I have done and I deserve everything that’s coming to me. I am worried about my Chloe but I have spoken to my sister and

she said she could look after her if I had to go away for a while.

As  I  said,  I  don’t  expect  forgiveness,  but  I  do  want  you  to  know  how sorry I am and if there was any way I could make it up to you, I would.

Best Wishes,

Nev

Subject: Re: Re:

Sent: Thu Jun 8, 2017 12:05 pm

From: naws09

Recipient: Rob

Hi  Rob,  just  a  quick  note  to  say  I  was  very  happy  to  see  you  on  Newly Diagnosed!  I  know  it  might  not  seem  like  such  a  big  thing,  but  it  has helped me so much. (That sounds terrible, I know. I don’t mean to make it about  us  when  of  course  it’s  about  helping  people  going  through  an awful  time,  but  well,  I  hope  you  know  what  I  mean.)  If  I  can  be philosophical  for  a  minute,  I  suppose  in  each  of  us  there  is  this  need  to give,  to  love,  to  share  ourselves—and  when  we  have  children,  we  have this perfect vessel for that. A place we can put all of our love. When I lost my son, suddenly that was all gone. That love didn’t have anywhere to go anymore. I think that’s what I’m trying to do on Newly Diagnosed. Trying to help people but also trying to find a place for all my love (as selfish as I know that sounds).

Subject: Re: Re:

Sent: Thu Jun 8, 2017 12:15 pm

From: Rob

Recipient: naws09

Thank you. You expressed it perfectly. I want to write more later, but have to  run  out  now.  I’m  a  little  confused  from  your  last  message.  You  said when you lost your son. Did you lose another child, as well as Lucy?

Subject: Re: Re:

Sent: Thu Jun 8, 2017 12:16 pm

From: naws09

Recipient: Rob

I wouldn’t make a very good spy.

Subject: Re: Re:

Sent: Thu Jun 8, 2017 12:16 pm

From: Rob

Recipient: naws09

What do you mean?

Subject: Re: Re:

Sent: Thu Jun 8, 2017 12:17 pm

From: naws09

Recipient: Rob

My little slip, my giveaway.

It’s me, Rob. It’s Anna.





beachy head

we were sitting in the sun having a picnic, looking down at the lighthouse and the rocks, and all you could talk about was the box, the kids takeout box from the chinese restaurant. god, that box, Jack, you were so besotted with it, wouldn’t let it out of your sight. you even slept with it in your bed, still with the grease stains and prawn-cracker crumbs until mommy insisted we wash it out. i know what you loved about it, jack. it was the pictures of the balloons, the chinese lanterns, the humming birds flying into the burning sun.

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