Walk Through Fire (Chaos, #4)(173)

I didn’t get out. He wanted to go over the top taking care of me, I’d let him.

Instead, as he parked wedged in with the other cars, cut the ignition, and angled out, I planned the rest of my day.

Make sure the girls were okay. Call my sister, Kellie, Justine, Ronnie, and get their asses to my house so I had my personal sisterhood close to prop me up so I could continue holding it together. Take a shower that might last a decade. Get out, call Tyra, and get her to set up an emergency Chaos sisterhood meeting.

Then spend the rest of the day attempting not to have a nervous breakdown.

Logan came to my side of the car, opened my door, and lifted me out. With me in his arms, he shut the door and stalked to my back door.

He was still pissed. Then again, he’d stood close throughout the whole story I’d told to the police so he wasn’t actually still pissed. He was more pissed.

Not good.

We were several feet away when the door was opened by Big Petey.

He gave Logan a look I tried to ignore, then turned a relieved smile to me as he vacated the door so Logan could carry me in.

He also shut the door behind us as Logan walked me to the edge of the bar and dropped my legs to put my feet on the ground.

Through this, I saw I didn’t have to call Tyra because she was already there. So were Lanie, Tabby, and Carissa.

It was a minor relief to tick that off my to-do list but I didn’t really get to feel that feeling.

This was because I was suddenly hit by a small force that, although small, sent me slamming into Logan.

I looked down and saw Zadie with her arms around me.

Okay, maybe my shower wouldn’t last a decade.

Maybe I wouldn’t take one at all.

And I definitely wasn’t going to have a nervous breakdown.

I already knew a kid’s hug had healing powers beyond the beyond.

But getting that from Zadie was beyond anything.

I put my hand to her hair as her hold spread warmth through me.

“I’m okay, sweetie,” I whispered.

She jerked her head back, giving me a red face, wet eyes, and an agonized expression.

“They said they were Daddy’s friends!” she cried. “They said they had something special for him!”

I struggled against her hold to crouch down in front of her. When I got into position, I took her in my own hold, not loose, not scary tight.

Just safe.

“We all, every one of us, make mistakes,” I said gently. “We trust people we shouldn’t. And it makes us feel dumb.” As she took a hiccoughing breath, I smoothed her hair away from the side of her face. “That’s not right,” I went on. “Someone does something wrong, it’s their bad. Not yours.” I moved my face closer to hers. “That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be smart. But you also gotta stop beating yourself up. You didn’t do wrong. They did.”

Her damp eyes went to the swelling on my face. “They hit you.”

“They did,” I reminded her. “Got my arms around you, Zadie. Am I here? Am I home with you and your sister and your dad? Am I okay?”

She drew in another hiccoughing breath but didn’t answer.

“I am, sweetie,” I answered myself (though it was a kind of lie, I wasn’t exactly okay, but I wasn’t going to share that).

“I was mean to you,” she whispered.

“Sometimes, learning how to do right isn’t the easiest lesson,” I told her. “And you were feeling a lot for reasons that were real, darling. There’s nothing wrong with wanting your family together. I get that.” Her lip quivered and her bright eyes got brighter so I cupped her soft cheek in my hand, stroking it with my thumb. “But you saw your daddy happy. You saw your mom was good. You didn’t handle the situation right in the beginning, Zadie, but if you get there in the end, that’s all that matters.” I gave her a small smile and asked, “Are you there?”

She took in another broken breath and nodded.

“Will you be my friend?” I asked.

She nodded again, this time more decisively.

No, definitely no nervous breakdown.

With that, no matter what happened to me that day, I was all good.

Everything was all good.

So I gave her a full grin and shared that.

“Then we’re all good.”

I saw Logan’s hand reach beyond me to cup the back of his little girl’s head.

“Love this sweetness, Zadie, but you gotta let your old man take care of his woman,” he said gently.

She looked up to her dad, her chin trembled, then she nodded and let me go.

I started to straighten but didn’t get there because the second Zadie stepped away, Cleo hit me hard, wrapping her arms around me and holding on tight.

“Glad you’re okay, Millie,” she whispered, her voice frail.

To combat that, I curved my arms around her and gave her a tight squeeze to let her know I really was okay.

When I started to release, she pulled away and moved directly to her sister to guide her deeper into the living room.

Pure Cleo, taking it on herself to do anything she could, great or small, to help out her dad.

I gave her a wink and as Logan guided me firmly to the hall, I turned my gaze to the women in my living room. I tried to give them a look that said we have to talk.

I wasn’t sure if they got my message before I had to look away to go down the hall.